To think it might be possible to let go of things that are holding me back.

[EternallyOptimisticish]

Name changed for this because it's SO unlike my usual posts on here. Also shamelessly posting in AIBU for traffic which I may regret...

I had a massage today for the first time in years. It was quite gentle and at first I thought it was a bit nothingy. But it really got to me at a deep level and I found myself feeling very emotional and reflective about all sorts of things. I was walking home and I had a strong sense that I can do better and choose to let go of the stuff that is holding me back.

It's nothing major - I have a decent home and job, and good people around me. But I just feel like I get in my own way so much, and I felt a really strong sense today that I can do better.

Specifically, I could let go of:

• Constant low level overeating meaning I'm heavier and have less energy than I could have.
• Endless procrastination and a fairly messy and neglected house
• Too much time getting irritated or incensed by strangers online. Sometimes being a total twat because I'm sure I'm right.
• Easily wound up by day to day life and wasting mental energy on stuff that doesn't really matter
• A general pessimism and anxiety at work that bears no resemblance to the generally OK feedback I get from my manager.

I guess I'm saying I had a strong feeling that I could be a healthier, happier, more constructive and more relaxed person if I could only get out of my own way. But how? It almost feels like there is a spiritual step I need to take but I can't see what it is.

So - am I being unreasonable to think there might be a next step which could bring about a spiritual sea change? Anybody done it? Any suggestions what that might be? Or should I just accept it was just a momentary reaction to a good massage and carry on muddling through as I am?

YABU: Yawn. You had a massage, your life is fine, get over yourself.

YANBU: Yes, it is possible to get out of your own way and become more at peace with yourself and the world.

Maybe we could aol report back here on steps we have taken each week towards a more positive existence?

Interesting post, thank you. I find doing a sport I am passionate about stops me from ruminating about whether things could be better because it is quite all consuming and just brings constant bursts of happiness. But, meanwhile many bits of my life that could be improved stay unaddressed. Am now wondering if I am putting a bandage over a wound or whether I am just finding a good way of dealing with a non perfect world! It has given me food for thought. Perhaps it’s possible to be dedicating myself to my hobby and sorting out my weight / relationship etc

Before I even read your post about EMDR I was thinking get some EMDR. So get some more EMDR. I think your body is still holding onto some of the trauma and the massage tapped into something. Have you read The Body Keeps the Score? The most important thing is for you to know, it’s not your fault.

I also have the same thoughts as you and could've written this post. Maybe take things one day at a time

Great thread, following with interest.

My 10% today - not thinking that I HAVE to do Proper Meals all the time and then failing and feeding everyone toast because the thought of meat, two veg and a sauce is too much.

I got the smallest to help me make a one pot macaroni cheese thing, it's got broccoli in so tick in that box, and it took 10min to put together.

I feel like this and although I slip back into bad habits sometimes I find my number one motivator to be a better person is exercise - it makes me feel strong mentally which means I'm less likely to eat junk and just generally makes me feel more positive and upbeat during the day. Wether that be a hiit workout or a nice long walk with the dog.

Also doing more things for me and my well-being - looking after myself, treating myself when I can make me more tolerable of life. Always nice to have something to look forward to and to make memories.