..to think having a baby destroys your body

[sjxoxo]

Had my first baby about 5 months ago; all fine apart from a few issues with breastfeeding; BUT.. my body is destroyed. Like unrecognisable to me. And I hate it.
Am 5”6. Was 56kgs before pregnancy. Went up to 86kgs during pregnancy. Now stuck at 75kgs and literally find myself repulsive. I’m actually embarrassed to go in and see colleagues tomorrow I feel that hideous…
I knew it would be hard physically but feel really depressed about myself now. Terrible back ache, saggy boobs, everything wobbles; my midriff is literally like something I’ve never seen before! I know a bit about diet and exercise and even with that knowledge I think I’ll never ever physically recover from having a baby. I don’t see how we can ever get our sex life back either. I wasn’t expecting it to be this ugly. AIBU for feeling so so utterly hopeless… did you manage to get your body back and fully recovered/fit again? The parenting bit is fine but I can’t bear the thought of living the rest of my life with this hideous body…. 😞

I felt the same! But it's such early days for you. The weight just started dropping off at around 6 months post Parton for me. And quickly got to the lightest I'd ever been without really trying. Breastfeeding and always on the go probably! My stretch marks faded into barely lines (I'm pregnant again now and they've come back), but confident that they'll go again!
My boobs are not the same, and after I'm done breastfeeding all my kids I'm considering a reduction. But that's it. I was mortified by my body and didn't feel like me at all. But it didn't stay like that, you're not broken and baggy forever I promise!

The body changes are big, but 5 months isn’t much time, and, because you are still carrying extra weight, your body is not where it will be.

Please try and own where you are now, you did an amazing thing, and if your colleagues are interested in your appearance at all (unlikely) this is what will be in their minds.

In the meantime, build a gentle plan to slowly get your body to where it can reasonably be. If you can afford it, a specialist personal trainer would be great, or try mothers classes as the trainers will have at least a bit of an idea.

I'm pregnant with my third and apart from boobs that have had the life sucked out of them, my body looks the same.

You're 5 months out. Give it time. You're probably exhausted and hormonally out of whack! It will get better. 💜

Your body did an amazing thing growing another human. 5 months isn’t that long for it to recover after what it’s been through. Try to be more gentle with yourself.

Unfortunately I don’t think there is enough knowledge about the long-term damage/changes that pregnancy and birth can cause. It can be a shock and there really didn’t enough support to help.

Plus it creates unrealistic expectations that we’ll just ‘bounce back’.

I wish some one had told me to where a corset after giving birth

My ribcage is totally fucked and if I ever get to a point of wearing a tight fitting dress or top then I will look deformed. One side sticks out at an angle

It definitely is noticeable as people have commented when I have worn a tight fitting t. Shirt

I know other people who look amazing and back to their pre pregnancy weight in months and are toned and fit but they are the ones that do make it their mission to get back in shape, not just dieting and general exercise or being very very lucky.

Yes down below is not right. Maybe prolapse
Weight - i was back to 8.5 stone and in my jeans within 2weeks but around youngest being 3 i gained loads. She stopped bf and i didnt sleep for all those years. Which has affected my brain too.

Yeah, my nigh-on 2 year old totally nixed my body. It seems to all be made of skin and flubber now, whereas there was a bit of muscle before, my stomach muscles have separated a lot and haven’t stuck back together, I’m a size bigger than I was, I had an assisted delivery, an episiotomy and my stitches popped before I’d healed so down there ain’t never looking the same again, my pelvic floor is shot despite numerous trips to the physio, but MOST soul destroying - my feet are half a size bigger so none of my carefully curated shoe collection fit anymore.

On the plus side, I’m reasonably healthy, none of the above are life-limiting, I wouldn’t have my fabulous little person without the battle scars and honestly, no one else really cares/notices as much as you think they must. The shoe situation still stings though.