Current YR 6 children going into YR 7

[yourmumsnet]

Is there anything we should be doing from now until September that I may not have thought of?

Uniform order and practice journey there and back.
Encourage enjoyment and cherishing last month of secondary school.
Slowly allowing more independence.

Anything else? I feel like this is quite a big transition and I'm anticipating lot of growth from seeming like a child to admire teenage like over the summer.

I want to allow that growth but whilst keeping good boundaries and not allowing to do too much and selfishly, maintaining family things rather than the focus shift all on friendship groups.

• stay off the year group/school what's app groups, they are toxic
• drill into them that anything posted on tiktok, snapchat etc will be screenshot and is out there forever
• for the first term, keep your head down and mouth shut as much as possible around the 'loud' or older students, don't be a target. Wear the popular shoes/bag (I'm only talking about the first few months).

I think the social adjustment is huge, from being the oldest and mixing with 4 year olds to sharing the corridors with 16 year olds. It can be brutal. Keep an eye out for bullying especially in the first few weeks.

That all sounds negative but dd has had a brilliant first year, the main issues arise on social media/group chats and older kids pushing/shoving in the corridors, but she is learning to leave conversations and not get involved in every drama.

Following. Another here who will have a year 7 for the first time in September, such a big change!

I’d definitely encourage the holiday club. At least try day 1. It will make things harder in September if most of others went.
Sort bedroom for studying. I found they needed help to get sorted term 1 - ask what homework, check got books and kit (being punished for forgetting is a big worry) then they can do themselves as they get more confidence and a system.

Definitely get them to be more organised and independent. My daughter year 9 and she's good at this. My son going into year 7 is not!!

Never mind your DS adjusting - you need to brace yourself too!
Kids change when they start secondary. When they used to smile, they now grunt. When they used to admire you, they start to find you embarrassing. They talk another language too!

But for your DS, both my boys worked on making lots of friends quickly, so they had allies in all classes to reduce the risk of bullying. I know it sounds cold blooded but they both said to me that it was really useful having someone to stick up for them if needed in all their lessons. It's a jungle out there!

DS2 left his brand new phone on the bus on the first day!

This in spades.

Enjoying this summer holiday before the transformation of the secondary pupil takes place.

Sounds like an absolute minefield - really surprised at the response on this thread and the varied information too.

Don’t do the foolish thing that I did….

Bought 3 pairs of def. not cheap M&S trousers at the start of the hols (feeling smug and ahead of the game..) and turn them up the same day… only for DS to try on the whole uniform 2 days before new school and find the trousers were now ‘cropped’ in length😱😱 Little sod had grown a good 3 inches in the hols and we had a mad dash round town shoving him into cheap trousers that actually touched his shoes!!

Dont be me….x

See if there's a Facebook page for parents. We have one that's just for uniform losses and swaps and sales etc. Really useful. I was recently reunited with a PE top that disappeared at Christmas !

@Summersdreaming

Wise words there 👍👍

would also add, keep an eye on boys personal hygiene… at this age they quickly go from smelling of baby shampoo to smelling like a skunk!! I remember boys that ponged a bit when I was at school got bullied as they were easy targets. Ditto having ‘the wrong’ shoes, bag, blazer etc.

Definitely get them to be more organised and independent. My daughter year 9 and she's good at this. My son going into year 7 is not!!

I was really worried about my DS (and to be fair he is still in his own world half the time) but I've been surprised at how quickly he got organised. He's coming to the end of year 7. He's absolutely paranoid about getting into trouble and this is a good motivator to remember things. Having said this I walked to the end of the road with him yday (I don't normally, we happened to be leaving at the same time and he was just about ok with me walking part way with him) and he had to turn around and run back to get his glasses!🤣

Absolutely agree with all of this.
I have 2 at secondary school and this is good advice

Useful thread even if I have one in year 10, I have a younger sibling starting a different school in Sept added complication of recent ASD diagnosis and late Aug birthday means she’s no way ready to cope with the social skills & organisation required for secondary 😞I’m worried but we have check lists, and I’ve got her (sadly) to move from hair bunches to ponytails in last few weeks. Plus will be getting plain black bag, shoes & coat, anything to help her ‘fit in’. It’s the only way my eldest has survived she morphed half way through yr7, to handbag swishy hair & subtle make up to it in physically. Academically she’s kept her head down but she did fail some key tests in yr7 from lack of revision, in hindsight it was the best thing as she learnt her lesson early on and now actively has her own study plan around sports training. Depending on the child an element of ‘failing’ in that first 6-months can help them learn more self sufficiency- alas my youngest won’t cope with this approach and needs huge scaffolding at present even in year6.

I've currently got dds in year 8 and 10, there are plenty of things you can do to help the transition (uniform, trying the route to school, independence bulked etc), however, one of the most useful things is for parents to not stress to much (oh, I know!!! It's ridiculously hard not to do, i feel your pain!), your dcs will feed off your stress and make things harder for them. Honestly it all has a strange way of working out!

Great thread! My DD is the only one from her primary going to her new school and she'll be getting the bus into another town. She still seems so babyish, I'm ever so worried for her. Really hope she makes some good friends!

No late nights the week before school starts.

My DS is in year 9 and I didn't know that you could do this, so thanks

Does anyone have any tips for the children who have two homes? My DD's Dad and I aren't together, and sadly it's as far from amicable as its possible to be and not likely to change. I have worries about what might happen if she leaves books etc at his when she needs them the next day.

@Greyskiesaregonnaclearup good communication bw parents about who supplies what (bus pass, uniform, 1 pe kit or 2 etc) and keep all school stuff (exercise books , pencil case etc together in her school bag and they travel with her.

@Greyskiesaregonnaclearup My kids live between mine and my ex-husbands houses. They are always forgetting things and we are both constantly dropping things off at each others houses.
If your dd is pretty organised she should be fine and just make sure she keeps all her books etc in her bag.

If you don't already have some, buy some strong plastic magazine files, different colours for each day - worked well for DS, and in fact they will still be in use in Sept for Y12. In theory all books should either be in their next day of use file, on the desk or in the school bag. We had a suggestion that homework should be completed on the day it was set, unless there genuinely wasn't time or it was something which needed a longer time to complete and was best tackled at the weekend. And always pack the bag the night before.
And gradually step back your oversight of homework etc. DS is not a natural at organisation but took to the file thing and for the last 3 years has planned out their homework schedule online.
There is much to take in, but it should also be exciting.

If you afford it, stock up on stationery, because when they need it they need it. DS2 is especially bad for this - he'll come home and announce that his compass broke, protractor disappeared, pen has run out etc, and he needs replacements for the next day or he'll get told off. So now I keep a stash of stuff for those last minute replacements, because it's not like primary school where teachers will lend equipment. If you don't have it, you have to quickly borrow from a friend before the teacher sees and tells you off.

I work in a school and at some point most Year 7 students have a meltdown - it's so normal. Either they're shattered / get a negative point and think it's the end of the world / lose their locker key / get the weeks mixed up so bring the wrong kit or books / etc.

An old Deputy Head of mine once said too many parents expect child at senior school = mature child who knows what they are doing. They don't so do check they've done homework, help packing their bags etc at least for the first few weeks if needed.

It's a really exciting time though, many of them have outgrown primary school.

At the school my DD is going to, the year 11's run a stationery shop during break and lunchtimes. It's a proper business venture set up by the school too, not just some kid with a bag full of pens. I can imagine DD will get a lot of use out of it 🤣

How to read a timetable.

Most are done with the times going down the page

Formtime
P1
P2
Break
P3
P4
Lunch
P5
P6

• rather than Formtime P1 P2 Break P3 P4 Lunch P5 P6 (for example)

Make sure they know how to tell the time on an analogue clock, preferably without numbers - wayyyy too many children of all abilities have just never really got the hang of it due to mobiles and smartwatches being everywhere in recent years.

How to learn a route/multiple routes - forming a 3D map in your head is really useful for navigating around a large school site, especially if it includes spotting useful markers (such as the dining hall, entrance to where their form room is, etc) which help them to expand the map in their heads so they don't get so lost. An equivalent would be knowing the number 1 bus takes you straight outside the school gate, but if there's a bus strike affecting one company, you can catch the number 7 outside the gate, get off one stop before the bus station and catch the number 28 home - that kind of thing.

They need to know your mobile number off by heart. Their phone could be confiscated, stolen, out of battery or the computer system is down and staff need to contact you.