Feeling lonely

[Popeyy]

Hi all,

don’t know what I’m expecting to get from this but think I just need to vent.

I’ve always made friends easily and had lots of friends but over the past five years, friendships have ended or drifted.

It’s got to the point where I feel like I don’t have any friends. I have recently moved jobs so WFH and only speak to work colleagues for business. The friends I do have don’t seem to really care about me. They hardly ever text and will take a while to reply to texts even though I know they’re on their phones all the time.

My best friend hasn’t replied in three months. I had an operation which she knew about and hasn’t reached out at all.

think I’m just at the point where all I seem to do is reach out and get nothing back. I understand people are busy but it hurts that they don’t make the effort with me when I suggest doing stuff as they are busy etc but always seem to be out with different people.

is it me? Or are the people I thought were my friends actually aren’t?

I think we are at a really weird time in the world at the moment.

I am finding it hard to keep up with friendships. I'm shit to be honest and wonder why anyone would still want to be friends with me.

We've moved house, into a place that needed a total refurbishment, which we have been dealing with. Our cars constantly have issues. My dd has been going through an extremely hard time lately and private counselling has cost us a fortune.

My husband has had skin cancer and we've been dealing with that - all good now thank god.

I have totally neglected my friendships.

This is not a reflection on me as a person. I still love my friends dearly. I hope they feel the same, but priorities just take over in life.

I'm working to get better and I might be one of the friends who has ignored you. It's not cos I don't care, it's cos shit is going down.

Give them the benefit of the doubt before writing anyone off 💐

Hope this makes sense

Thank you. It makes perfect sense. It had not accrued to me to think of it like this.

Not just you at all.
I think everyone got used to life without socialising for the last few years, and now it feels like an effort. I love my friends to pieces but I do find the weeks slip by without being in contact.

I also think that spending so much time online, be it at work or socially or just during our downtime is draining us of energy and motivation for ‘real life’ people and stuff.

In the same boat here. I feel like I reach out to people a lot and get nothing back. I recently asked a friend for a favour- nothing that would put her out and she didn't even reply. That was a week ago. This is someone who I have been kind to and done favours for. It's hard sometimes and It makes you question yourself as a person but I think people just get wrapped up in their own lives and are busy.
Still doesn't change the fact we've got no decent friends though really.

Totally get where you're coming from. Been really upset by two different very long term friends today, I know I'm too sensitive but honestly you wonder why you bother some days as it can be so hurtful being close to people sometimes. Hugs xx