If you organise a pot luck you should actually cook?

[Marleh]

A good friend of ours insisted on doing a pot luck style dinner for the solstice, where you all bring a dish to share. That’s fine, I love tasting different things.

Each of us spent a few hours cooking something the night before or day of. Someone made a fancy cake. Someone made some veggie parcels, someone else made some salads, someone made pasta bake etc etc.

The host? Brought two roundels of cheese and two breadsticks and a packet of crisps. She said oh you know she’s so busy, she was at work from 9am to 3pm, so didn’t have time to cook before dinner at 7pm.

She has done this many times before. AIBU to think if you organise a pot luck dinner, then you should cook?

Did she say everyone had to make something? If not, if it was just an arrangement to 'bring something', then it was everyone's choice to make something and it's not reasonable to complain about someone who made a different choice.

And as pp said - her contribution was the suggestion, the venue, the cutlery and glassware, the tidying up beforehand and the cleaning afterwards.

Next time, clarify whether you're expected to cook or buy something.

Two breadsticks? What, little individual grissini or two sticks of bread?

When I host an event - it’s around 8 hours work and usually quite significant expense. 5 hrs to assemble and create and 3 hrs tidy up. It depends how you host. I would never not cook a dish but sometimes think I am a muggins. I could not compare the effort of cooking a dish to hosting, it is insignificant- plus when guests are there you are ‘on’ taking coats, serving drinks, ensuring all are getting along, music etc. I imagine she is feeling under appreciated and possibly rightly.