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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask why hairdressers are so violent with long hair?

46 replies

Chocolatefreak · 21/06/2022 14:00

Just been to a new hairdressers as my usual one is off sick. As someone who's had long hair pretty much for the last thirty years, I'm always astonished about the brutal treatment of my long hair by hairdressers. This is what they nearly always do, and it's annoying because it's damaging:

  • Shampooing hair twice, with extra tangly rubbing to the dry ends (once is enough, and you don't need to massage the ends, only the scalp, the soapy water running through when rinsing is enough to wash the ends)
  • Using hot water! Cool/lukewarm is less damaging.
  • Not using conditioner (helps combing through and dryness)
  • Trying to comb by dragging comb through from scalp rather than starting at ends and working up - or worse still, using a brush to attack your head - again from the roots, so your head is painfully dragged back
At hairdressing school don't they include any training on how to treat long hair? And yes I sometimes offer to comb my own hair - but they're the professionals!

Yes, I know this is a first world problem, sorry! Rant over for the next three months!

OP posts:
Vodika · 21/06/2022 14:02

What cheap skates are you going to who don't use conditioner?

Marvellousmadness · 21/06/2022 14:03

Go to a better hairdresser
And comb your hair yourself next time ...

Honeyroar · 21/06/2022 14:06

I agree with a lot of what you say. My long straight hair never knots at home , yet some hairdressers over the years have got it in terrible knots while washing it, been really rough trying to comb it out and rolled their eyes at me in the mirror as though it’s my hair that’s the issue. I frequently say it never knots at home!

orwellwasright · 21/06/2022 14:08

I'm with you, OP. Add curls in to the mix and it's a recipe for disaster. 'No, I don't want loads of serum, thanks'.

SirenSays · 21/06/2022 14:08

This is so true! The last time I had a proper cut she used the most drying products, knotted my hair into a ball and then spent an age combing it out with the world's smallest comb.

When I have shorter hair they always want to hack off more than I want. But when it's long they're really reluctant to cut it short. I feel like I spend half the appointment reassuring them I'm not going have a breakdown when it's cut and the other half saying "Shorter please!"

xogossipgirlxo · 21/06/2022 14:11

My hairdresser is really gentle, but my mum's brought tear to my eyes. Awful.

Chocolatefreak · 21/06/2022 14:14

@Marvellousmadness I went to a new one as my usual one (who I've managed to train a bit, lol) is off sick.

I've been to expensive hairdressers and cheap ones, same rough treatment.

Like I said, I do sometimes offer to comb my own hair, but they're the professionals, FFS. My hair isn't even particularly long!

OP posts:
Lightning020 · 21/06/2022 14:17

They can also scratch your ears with their comb.

RonObvious · 21/06/2022 14:19

SirenSays · 21/06/2022 14:08

This is so true! The last time I had a proper cut she used the most drying products, knotted my hair into a ball and then spent an age combing it out with the world's smallest comb.

When I have shorter hair they always want to hack off more than I want. But when it's long they're really reluctant to cut it short. I feel like I spend half the appointment reassuring them I'm not going have a breakdown when it's cut and the other half saying "Shorter please!"

I get this too. I tend to get my hair cut pretty infrequently, so when I do, I often just want it all hacked off. I've had hairdressers refuse to do it before.

Basilbrushgotfat · 21/06/2022 14:20

I wear it short these days but I used to have to very long and never encountered hairdressers like this 🤨

LaFloristaCalista · 21/06/2022 14:21

I go to a curly hair hairdresser so they are very careful. Curly hair is fragile. However in the past I've come across hairdressers like to describe. I tend to complain on the spot. I am sure they don't treat their own hair like that

BobbinHood · 21/06/2022 14:23

I have really long hair and have never experienced this - except the hot water but I’m quite sensitive to heat and assume it’s because other people are wimps about cooler water. I usually get asked if I want conditioner, but they’re generally much more careful and gentle than I am with my hair myself.

Thatswhyimacat · 21/06/2022 14:25

I once had a piercing on the top of my ear that lasted for 3 weeks before my hairdresser ripped it out with a brush, after having caught it and been asked to be more careful several times already.

I've never been to a hairdresser that didn't put conditioner on?

purplecorkheart · 21/06/2022 14:28

I haven't really experience any of what you said but to be honest a lot of the issues could be resolved with simple requests during the consultation. Tell them that you want the water lukewarm, that you want only one shampoo and that your hair tangles so you want it detangle for end to root.

BogRollBOGOF · 21/06/2022 14:30

RonObvious · 21/06/2022 14:19

I get this too. I tend to get my hair cut pretty infrequently, so when I do, I often just want it all hacked off. I've had hairdressers refuse to do it before.

I spent two years growing my hair for my wedding so there was plenty to play with for styling. Spent two hours at the hairdressers having it put up on the wedding morning then went back two days later to have it cut to shoulder length for my honeymoon (I was going traveling in hot countries so shorter was more comfortable and practical)
Are you sure?
Yes
Are you really sure?
Yes, really sure!
😆

steff13 · 21/06/2022 14:30

I've always had long hair and I've been to quite a few hairdressers, and I've never experienced this. I'm in the US, though, maybe they teach things differently.

UpToonGirl · 21/06/2022 14:31

Never been to a hairdresser that didn't use conditioner but YANBU.

I feel like so much hair gets ripped out. I've actually started cutting my own hair - looks better than most hairdresser cuts I've had!

worraliberty · 21/06/2022 14:34

Chocolatefreak · 21/06/2022 14:14

@Marvellousmadness I went to a new one as my usual one (who I've managed to train a bit, lol) is off sick.

I've been to expensive hairdressers and cheap ones, same rough treatment.

Like I said, I do sometimes offer to comb my own hair, but they're the professionals, FFS. My hair isn't even particularly long!

You don't see a possible correlation between you 'training' qualified hairdressers and the rough treatment?

RidingMyBike · 21/06/2022 14:34

I've got reasonably long hair and never experienced this - have had it cut in various places across the U.K.?

Scianel · 21/06/2022 14:34

I stopped going to the hairdresser in 2015 when the one I'd been using for years closed down, I can't face any of it again.

stealthninjamum · 21/06/2022 14:36

I agree op, I have never found a hairdresser who wasn’t too rough with me and I’ve been to expensive salons and cheap ones. I have curly hair that knots as soon as it dries but when I wash it it’s a simple process to remove the knots. Hairdressers seem to brush hard to pull the knots out and i can see them making my hair a frizzy mess when they just need to be more gentle.

Toucan123 · 21/06/2022 14:38

I've been to lots of different hairdressers over the years and experienced this many times. The worst is when they've tried to dry my hair by vigorously rubbing my head with a towel. I hate it when hairdressers are really rough with my hair then complain to me about how "knotty" it is, as if there's something wrong with my hair and not their hair washing/ drying skills!😡

CaptainMyCaptain · 21/06/2022 14:40

My hair is long and curly. They often want to use a brush and then blow dry it both of which will turn it into a frizz. I usually walk out with it still damp.

LookAtMyCircumstance · 21/06/2022 14:48

I was put off one place where it seemed compulsory for all the hairdressers to have false nails and send the entire haircut jabbing me in the scalp with their massive talons. The hair wash was torture, there was a slight break during the cut but the blow dry was just violent. I had mention it, but she kept on even with my wincing.

Chocolatefreak · 21/06/2022 14:52

@Toucan123 oh yes, the towel - rubbing!

Then, starting to detangle from the scalp with a brush! Ouch! 😭

OP posts: