AIBU for dumping a friend

[Babymomma47]

We have been ‘friends’ since childhood she was always the popular confident one and I was her shy sidekick tagging along. She’s always been a bit selfish and manipulative but I was always grateful to let me be her friend. Fast forward 20 years she’s been married and divorced quite young. I’m happily married with 2 kids, good job and finally feel happy and confident being me. She says I’ve changed and not the person I used to be. Doesn't like me talking about kids or work or hubbie so our friendship has become strained. I finally feel at the age of 40 comfortable in My own skin but she doesn’t like the real me. What to do? I can’t be myself around her anymore. AIBU after 20 years to move away from the friendship?

YANBU - she was only your friend while she felt superior to you.

Yes, you've outgrown each other.

I wouldn't dump, just let drift

It almost seems like she wants the friendship to end too by putting all those restrictions on your conversations.

You could ask her by phone, if she still wants to be friends with you and listen very carefully to her reply? Catch her unawares with a phone call and you may get the truth.

I'd stop engaging with her.

She led the friendship but you've forged a lovely family life , ahead of her.
Her insistence that you don't talk about marriage or family life is so that she doesn't feel 'inferior' to you as it reinforces that she no longer has the upper hand .

It's a bit childish but also rather sad.

I'd be minded to let this friendship go , sad though it might seem.

I think I’ve been carrying a lot of guilt on this issue and overcome with a flood of tears with all your responses. Of course this is only my side of the story and I know she’s had a tough life so I feel bad walking away from it. But our friendship has turned toxic and I’ve been in denial. So thank you for making me feel ok about this.

When someone says you've changed as a form of complaint, it means they realise they don't have power/influence over you anymore. Dump her and enjoy your life.

It's her, not you.

Having a friend who wanted to talk about their 'hubbie' would give me the ick though.