10 year old haircut

[Jourdain11]

DD1 (10) has been asking to get her hair cut short for months. It's been long for most of her life, so I was a bit worried that she'd regret it and be upset, but on Tuesday she took the plunge and got it chopped to a pixie cut (but sort of with bangs at the front). It looks very cute and she loves it! We also used to have a daily battle about brushing, because her hair is thick and wavy got very knotty - now it takes around 30 seconds to run a comb through it.

However... there was an event at the school on Friday and no less than 3 people, including DD1's teacher, made "interesting haircut" type comments and hinted that she might be "questioning her gender identity". I said she'd wanted the haircut for months and got sage nodding and a question about whether she was trying to tell me something. Yes - she was trying to tell me that she wanted short hair!

If DD1 were transitioning or questioning I absolutely would be open to hearing what she felt and wanted. But ffs, can a girl not get a short haircut without people assuming that she's nb or wants to be a boy?!

”interesting haircut" type comments

what did they actually say? Because it’s more than likely they were just surprised she’d gone from really long hair to drastically short. I’ve done it as an adult and people do tend to react with alarm tbh, even those who smile and say the right things can’t hide the ‘OMG!’ In their eyes because it’s gone so short.

One said, "hmmm, interesting haircut!" and raised their eyebrows. Another said, "M's had all her hair cut off!" which was more of a genuine surprised reaction I think (and made me laugh, because it sounded like she thought I might not have noticed!). Then someone said "I see M's had her haircut - it's rather drastic, isn't it?" So there was a spectrum.

It’s the current fashion for all girls to have long hair and all boys to have short. It’s really backwards and boring IMO, and for me it’s in the same category as the fact the toys are more gender separated than they were 20-30 y ago. When I was a tween / teen, lots of girls had pixie cuts / bobs, and lots of boys had grown their hair to go with their vaguely alternative style. It was just more interesting and no one would assume eg a metal fan to be questioning his gender identity 🙄

Your dd's teacher needs to get a life and a grip learn to keep her silly opinions to herself. Kid gets haircut = questioning gender identity, is mad.

Your dd's happy with it, you're happy with it, end of story.

How rude of them all.

My youngest DS who is 8 has hair down his back. He constantly gets girl comments or mistaken for a girl, asked if he wants to be a girl. He just wanted long hair like his grandad. He always wears it up for school as well.

It's a subversive act at the moment to have short hair if you're a girl.
My DD is at high school and almost no girls have short hair anymore. She's amazed no one has asked her if she's NB or trans yet. But they do assume she's a lesbian.

Sadly some very small minded people still think short hair on a female = lesbian. I as a middle aged woman have experienced this whenever I've cut my hair very short. A certain group of mums at school nearly lost their minds when I had a buzz cut 😂

DD for her hair cut short a few months ago, she is 12 and still getting called a lesbian.

My 10yo dd has kids in the playground telling her she must be a boy, as she has short hair. Actually arguing with her!

Her best friend is a boy, with long hair in a pony tail, which also blows their minds.

Tell them you are both really pleased with it and how awesome it looks and suits her.

Then quietly tell them to stfu being so rude.

Call them out on it.

So the next person that says what an interesting hair cut id reply

Yes isn't it and how fab it looks on dd with a smiley cheery voice.

You will always get rude people sadly that think girls with short hair are questioning things or want to change gender.

You can't teach stupid I'm afraid op but what you can do is make them look like twats in the nicest possible way when they do it.

Keep it positive trust me theyl feel silly for the comments and if they don't that's on them.

I can see that people comment if they notice a big change, but it can make you feel so self conscious. I waited 10 years between deciding that I wanted to cut my hair short, and actually doing it, mostly because I didn't want the attention of everyone commenting on it.

I'm glad your daughter is enjoying her convenient hair style and hope people don't keep making weird insinuations.

I think it looks really nice and suits her - the only reason I didn't let her have it done right away was because she's always had long hair and I thought she might be upset and regret it. She used to have it in plaits/a plait but didn't want that any more, so it got in such a tangle. It's such a relief not to have to do daily battle over it!

I see quite a few girls who have a short bob, but few with short-short hair.

It's kind of ridiculous that people assume that a girl with short hair is lesbian, but I find it crazy that they'd assume she has gender identity issues.

My DS used to have really long ringlet curls. One day he decided he wanted it all chopped off, so we did.
He was the talk of the school playground the next day!
I think drastic haircuts are likely to attract attention. BUT I think the implications in your case are ridiculous!

It's ridiculous I agree, not to mention rude! My daughter is 8 and recently had her long hair cut into a very short bob - her request, although I was delighted. She's very active and her plaits/ponytail never stayed in place for long. By the end of the school day she would look like a scarecrow. The shorter hair really suits her face shape too. And brushing/washing is so much easier.

But omg the comments!!! Her dad took her to the hairdresser who actually said she wasn't that happy about doing it because "what if mum doesn't like it?" Since then so many school parents/ teachers have remarked on it being a surprising choice or "I bet she regretted it when she saw it". So rude!

Conversely my son had long hair at that age (again his choice and really suited him) and people used to ask me and him when he was going to get it cut. One bloke cycled past us one day and yelled "get yer 'air cut!". He sounded really angry about it. Eventually he did as he was sick of the teasing about "girly" hair. He's now 17 and it's long again! He no longer gives a toss.

Yep, my DD would always come home looking like a scarecrow too and getting a brush through it was a nightmare! She likes it short and I think it really suits her. Back when I was her age (we're talking ca 1998) there weren't heaps of girls with short hair, but nobody would have thought it odd or even particularly unusual. Certainly nobody would have commented about it, except maybe to describe someone, i.e. "the girl with short brown hair".