I’m not from UK but been here for almost 17 years. It’s a nice country and I’ve contributed to the the economy and the society as much as I can. But I’m really struggling when it comes to making friends…I don’t have a single friend or family in this country. I’m struggling with the loneliness and fear that I’ll end up in a cocoon which is not healthy…
a lot if people think it’s easy to forge connections when joining a club etc. But my experience largely has been-
although the general public are nice there is always a invisible line in which some are in and some are not so in. Im not saying it’s racism per se- I belong to the ethnic minority group but everything which happens is not racist. Or I refuse to see it that way. It’s more a general feeling if ‘let’s keep it at a arms length’ attitude.
another one is drink- if you don’t drink you be one an outsider- I don’t drink. Not because of anything else other than I never liked it..but I have noticed that stands in the way. As in if you drink, you are fun. If you don’t, then ok I’ll stay away from you.
i come from a place where people talk…a lot! To everybody!! Although as annoying as that was when I was a teenager now I see there was a inclusive attitude - but I’ve noticed when you are new the conversations (not all but most) are exclusive. So you struggle to join in.
Again this is not a ‘us and them’ or ‘oh look everyone is a racist’ thread. It’s a genuine question to anyone who is struggling like me to know how are you managing this? And to anyone else who might have some ideas!!