Who keeps the money?

[StColumbofNavron]

DC14 asked for an expensive musical instrument for Christmas with a view to taking music for GCSE. They have subsequently decided not to do music GCSE, give up their instruments to focus on said GCSEs and thought they wanted to keep the instrument to play for leisure. They have now said they probably won't play it anymore so we should sell it. (We bought a new one because they have been playing a number of years and had previously had a well used second hand one and then was without for a while).

My question is, if I sell it (and it will be me, he will just leave it languishing) who should get the money? It is his at the end of the day and was a gift, but it cost a fair bit for only a few months use and I will be the one putting the effort in to getting rid of it. To be honest, I am actually thinking I will put it into his savings account rather than necessarily keep it myself. I just don't want him to squander the cash.

You want him to spend it on pillows and duvet covers?

I don't think big ticket items like that need to have their actual monetary value reimbursed. It was obviously a special gift with a purpose, not a usual Christmas gift, and you're going to lose money on reselling it when it never got used. Plus it's six months since Christmas now, so I'd just keep the money or stick it in savings for him later!

I'm just making stuff up - I'm sure there are bigger things he will want for the new bedroom but I couldn't think of any and pillows and duvets were the only thing I could think of. 😳

A gaming chair and lava lamp are more likely and obviously far more fun option.

I was bought a violin as a Christmas present when I was young. After I gave up several years later, my mum sold it and kept the money. I was extremely upset as it felt like she was taking the gift back because I hadn’t worked hard enough or been good enough at it. Let him keep the money OP.

It's his money.

We were in this exact situation. Electronic drum kit.

DD advertised it herself on gumtree and got £250 for it (few years ago).

The money was hers to keep, which she put towards something else.

DD advertised it herself on gumtree and got £250 for it (few years ago).

But he isn't going to do this.

I am 100% not taking the money, but I am going to try to exercise some control over it being spent wisely. Or he might surprise me and do it himself, in which case I will stay out of it.

My mum sold my doll's pram when I was about 9 or 10. She kept the money.

I don't think I've ever got over it 😂

He should keep the money but he should be the one going to the effort of selling it

I sold it via my FB account and sorted the collection as she was only 13 but DD made the decision to sell, it was her item to sell so she reaped the financial rewards. She ended up deciding to sell loads more which was great for us during a move, less for us to box up, store and move.

I'd be putting the top up above the usual amount you spend in his savings account and telling him so. So he gets say £100 to squander and the rest is for something sensible. Or he's better off than his brother.

Your son should get the money.

Agree save it for another time - next gifts or save for driving lessons (a present for xmas) here are X amount of lessons for you like a voucher.
That's such a faff to deal with.