Hello
I think in the wrong board, but I realise I might come across as BU.
I am in a little bit of a bind and I am hoping I will find some solutions here from this wonderful network. I live in London and I have a new job in Bristol. I will need to go into the office from September 2 dpw. My husband can work from home although he needs to be in Reading 3 times a month
My husband wants a change to city living, so we are looking at other nearby areas to rent, while trying to sell our property in London. We are craving some space, and living closer to my family who are in Exeter.
The main issue is the schools.
I understand that we will not be allocated a place by the LEA until we move. However, we do not want to move until we have a place at a school of our liking.
My son had a terrible first couple of terms at a school 2 years ago, where he was silently bullied and it shattered his confidence. He is shy and sensitive but had no issues making friends prior to starting school, one which was very big on preaching inclusivity for all except for all but not so good at following through on their slogans. I was told at numerous teacher meetings that I was over-reacting, and perhaps my child was just very shy or over-sensitive.
We pulled him out and he is now thriving at his new school which happens to be a faith school. I am a practicing Catholic, my husband is a born-again Dawkins disciple but we have agreed on the faith school route and he can make his mind up later. I have a younger child who turns 5 in a couple of years’ time.
So schooling is the single most important factor here, more than the house or area. If our children are thriving and happy, then I can make peace with everything else (apart from it being an unsafe area). However, we have been told by most of the schools we went to visit and liked, that we will be on a long waiting list until we move because we are not within the catchment area, I cannot risk moving until we have a good school. I feel incredibly guilty about uprooting my son as it is especially since he has new-found confidence, he is on the school council and loves his football. Compared to a little boy of a couple of years ago, who grew pale before our eyes, dropped weight, began bed-wetting, and developed a nervous tic. My husband is very much of the same opinion.
I should add we cannot afford private, so it has to be state school route.
I’ve been told by colleagues that I am over-sensitive, that children are adaptable and we should get on with the move, and go for the first available space at a local school until we get a place at the school we do like. I want to avoid this scenario for the above reasons. As a child, I also moved primary schools 4 times due to my father's work, and I found it an isolating experience.
Has anyone been in this quandary - finding a good school first before moving? I know it is usual to find the place first, but I cannot take the risk of ending up at another school that fails my son.
All helpful suggestions very welcome.
Thank you!