Allow DM to look after 4yo DS after 2 mini strokes

[sunflowerandivy]

DM has had two mini strokes in past 3 years and was admitted to hospital on both occasions. DM has seen neurologist who confirmed TIAs as opposed to any other neurological reason such as MS/ MND.
DM on blood thinners and still drives (within DVLA rules)).
DM wants to take DS on days out - driving places or at her house but I think it's too risky due to stroke risk AIBU?

DM is 75 years old

I had 2 suspected TIAs, days apart, in my forties, 15yrs ago.

I am on aspirin as a blood thinner and have had nothing like them since, have driven thousands of miles all over UK on my own, for work and pleasure, so I think you are being very very unreasonable.

It doesn’t follow that she will have another TIA or stroke, the blood thinners are given to counteract that risk. The only time I think about them is when I am declaring for travel insurance!

Were both the TIAs prior to be medicated with blood thinners? I think if they were and she is taking her meds properly and keeping an eye on her blood pressure then I think you should let your mum live her life as she wishes including with your DS.

You need to get some proper advice from a medical professional as to the risks involved really as I think that's the only thing that will put your mind at rest.

FWIW I had my last TIA whilst pregnant with my now 17 year old, had had 2 before that. Not had one since and have had more children too.

I probably wouldn't leave any 75 year old alone with a small child for a prolonged period of time, forget letting them drive them on days out. I'll probably get flamed but 🤷 I would have doubts about their physical fitness to keep up with the child. And yes 2 mini strokes would make me anxious about the driving part specifically.

She's on blood thinners since the first TIA. So had her second whilst medicated.

In that case I think you need to leave it a while without her driving your DS and preferably not driving at all, and get her a Careline pendent/bracelet. A 4 year old could be taught to press that in an emergency if she does have another TIA whilst with him and is unable to press it herself.

@EgonSpengler2020 a very sensible suggestion. Unfortunately she's in denial about the incidents. Refers to them as "funny turns". She would never give up driving unless made to and would go ballistic if we suggested a care line bracelet! (Her own parents are in their 90s and have careline pendants). This is why it's so difficult, she can't really accept that it's happened