Am I the one in the wrong?

[elevenspowers]

Arranged to meet a friend on the Thursday just gone and she forgot and made other plans. This is the second time she’s done this and although not on purpose it hurts.

She sent me an apology text on the Thursday and I didn’t respond to it until Sunday. When I’m hurt I try to give myself time to not be reactive, my text back was telling her not to worry and asked how her weekend was.

She usually messages back the same day but hasn’t acknowledged it yet so potentially she’s now annoyed at me.

i just don’t think I did anything wrong unless someone can enlighten me?

YANBU! She sounds horrible, especially if she kept the plans she made after you had reminded her. I don't know why people are sort of blaming you for the situation. Also an explosive reactive response text would have been much worse. I think I would drop her as a friend if I was you or see how she behaves going forward and then reevaluate the situation.

So what on Earth are you asking about then

Well the first time, she’d made new plans with a friend who treats her quite shitty (let’s her down a lot and is rude to her). And the plans were made because her friend had let her down and it was then rearranged to the day I was seeing her.

That one really hurt because I would drive the two hour round trip to see her each week since lockdown (she can’t drive). Then I got dropped for a friend that rarely bothers to see her - when I was the original plan.

Think I’m probably just a filler friend as she doesn’t have any other friends but now she’s good friends with her boyfriends group of friends. Guess I served my purpose.

I didn’t expect a response in 3 hours.

You are being ridiculous now tbh.

She sounds like a real flake, OP.

Good that you've got pride and self esteem - focus on the people who do value you xxx

Does she not have any other friends, or did she cancel you for another friend the first time?

It really doesn’t matter because my gut instinct is she isn’t going to respond. And there’s nothing that can change what’s been done in the last few days. Sending a further text won’t help and she probably wouldn’t answer if I called:

If she wants to end the friendship over this then that’s her choice. It benefits me because I give importance to this person and always said to her she can even come live with me when her and her boyfriend were having issues - so it stops me wasting energy on someone who doesn’t want my friendship.

Thanks for the opinion. I need to reevaluate how I express my feelings/reactions.

You are a good friend to her, it is totally her loss and when her relationship blows up she won't have you to rely on.

Choose better people op. She sounds like a total taker and has never really contributed, she forgot about the meet up because she isn't investing anything.

Block her and move on with your other friends. Your plans sound really fun