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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Can't afford rent, social housing wait ridiculous, what to do?

93 replies

BrownieBanana · 06/06/2022 17:51

I'm stuck living with a family member sharing a bedroom with my toddler. I can't afford rent as a 2 bed near me is £900+. Childcare fees are the same. That's my salary wiped. Even with universal credit it isn't doable on my wage. I'm going insane as have been living with tm family member for 2 years plus. I have 4000 on savings so that covers rent for 4 months but I 5eally don't want to just spunk it on unsustainable rent. I just don't know what to do as I can't even look at things like house shares with such a young child. What are other people doing? Just living with their family members for years on end? Makes relationships extremely difficult. Toll on mental health is huge. I'm 31. I'm so fed up. Just want my own place and for it to not put me in debt.

OP posts:
Fayekrista · 06/06/2022 18:26

You are entitled to a 2 bed, you need to check with local council what the lha is, there are rent deposit schemes that will also cover 1st months rent/deposit & act as guarantor for private rent.
You're likely entilited to a UC top up & part rent paid.
Go onto the website entitledto & they will give you a pretty accurate figure of what you can receive in help to.

girlmom21 · 06/06/2022 18:26

@DamnUserName21 but the OP's current situation is also hard. She needs to decide which is worse.

Onwards22 · 06/06/2022 18:35

YANBU!

It’s really scary how expensive private rent is vs wages.

Do you know your position on the list?
Do you know if you move up once your DD gets to a certain age?

You’ve done really well to have so much in savings!
Have you looked into shared ownership or help to buy (deposit £5k)?

You wont be wasting money on rent and you’ll be building some equity for yourself and DD.
I’ve not done it myself but it’s definitely worth looking into if you haven’t.

Onwards22 · 06/06/2022 18:38

I’d also still look for a 1 bed as you can reapply for social housing and say you were asked to leave your accommodation now which is why you had to get anything.

Hollipolly · 06/06/2022 18:40

Go to your local housing and request temp accommodation your seen as adequately housed right now OP. If your family were to throw you out you would be re housed a lot faster.

TheYearOfSmallThings · 06/06/2022 18:43

You should definitely get help with housing costs and be able to reclaim a proportion of childcare. I live in London and I know plenty of people who would never be able to afford to rent if not for these benefits. Don't move away from your family and job IMO.

worriedaboutmoney2022 · 06/06/2022 18:46

www.entitledto.co.uk

Have a look at this calculator and see what you could get

Crocsandshocks · 06/06/2022 18:48

You're on your way to a house deposit with 4 k. Can you borrow the rest and get a mortgage in a starter home? Contact a mortgage broker to see what's available.

NettleTea · 06/06/2022 18:50

Crocsandshocks · 06/06/2022 18:48

You're on your way to a house deposit with 4 k. Can you borrow the rest and get a mortgage in a starter home? Contact a mortgage broker to see what's available.

maybe a shared ownership - then if your income isnt enourmous you would still be able to get UC housing element and help with childcare

BrownieBanana · 06/06/2022 18:53

Crocsandshocks · 06/06/2022 18:48

You're on your way to a house deposit with 4 k. Can you borrow the rest and get a mortgage in a starter home? Contact a mortgage broker to see what's available.

Sorry so many people have asked questions! I've spoken to a mortgage advisor and they've just said no way on my wage and with childcare fees. I don't think I can live here another year. I genuinely cry myself to sleep every night because of it and have severe depression just because I don't have space. My son can't have playdates. I can't invite friends over. I'm so fed up.

OP posts:
dustandroses · 06/06/2022 18:54

You're not wrong, rents are ridiculous. Have you put the correct LA rent allowance into the UC calculator?

lha-direct.voa.gov.uk/Secure/Search.aspx

A little warning about UC and childcare costs you have to pay them up front for UC yes they will pay up to 85% but only in arrears, this is not well publicised but is a potentially devastating detail.

Are you receiving UC now?

Rosebel · 06/06/2022 18:56

I'd try social housing. If you can get your relative to "evict" you, you'll be homeless and with a young child I think they have to house you.
Unfortunately it might be temporary accommodation at first or in a different area so I'm not sure if that's better or worse.

Neverplayleapfrogwithaunicorn · 06/06/2022 18:57

It's a terrifying situation to be renting at the moment. We have rented our property for 11 years as we can't get a mortgage despite earning £65k PA between us.
Our landlord thankfully hasn't put rent up in years as the property is quite old fashioned. It was his mums house and he couldn't sell it when she passed away. It's the only house my daughter has ever known though and if we had to move we would only be able to rent a one bed flat for the three of us with the amount we currently pay for a three bed.
we are just praying that the landlord continues to appreciate good tenants.

My home town always had an abundance of much cheaper rentals. I just looked and there are two solitary places.

could moving to a cheaper place work for you? www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/123862556#/?channel=RES_LET

bellac11 · 06/06/2022 18:57

People are suggesting ridiculous ideas, OP has 4k in savings, that wont get her a mortgage, it will barely pay the cost of the survey and mortgage fees

Shared ownership is incredibly expensive, you pay rent, mortgage and service charge, plus the charges to apply for the mortgage and survey in the first place

OP would be better off renting a one bed in a cheaper area for a while and see if the local council will do a rent deposit scheme and find a landlord that wont need a guarantor.

Rent is a disgrace in this country

TheGoogleMum · 06/06/2022 18:57

I'm surprised more people aren't in this situation the way rents and house prices are going up!

Boymumsoymum · 06/06/2022 18:58

BrownieBanana · 06/06/2022 17:58

Work wise I work in research. Pays hardly anything but I'm applying for promotions and always looking for other jobs

Are you able to be more specific - I'm surprised your wage is so low working in research? Are you in a permanent full time job? Or do you mean 'research' like completing market research surveys etc for small amounts of money to fit with looking after your child?

orwellwasright · 06/06/2022 18:58

I really feel for you and wish there was more social housing available.

I can't add to the advice you've already received but to cheer yourself up why not have a read of the threads on here from rich people moaning they don't know what to spend their money on.

Lilly11a · 06/06/2022 18:59

Big ask but would the family member help with childcare for a period if it meant you could move out ?

Just till you get the 30 hours funded

Boymumsoymum · 06/06/2022 19:00

girlmom21 · 06/06/2022 18:26

@DamnUserName21 but the OP's current situation is also hard. She needs to decide which is worse.

Definitely this. Life isn't easy, lots of us have to make tough decisions. I live 1.5hours away from my nearest family members because I can afford a higher standard of living here. Yes I'd love to be closer to family but.....choices. which is the lesser of 2 evils

Mumnetter111 · 06/06/2022 19:01

Can you move areas to somewhere cheaper (e.g Hull you can rent a 2 bed flat there from £350 a month.) Once your DC goes to school you’ll have less money to spend on childcare. No it won’t last forever, in the future you could have found a partner and then there would be 2 incomes coming in.

BrownieBanana · 06/06/2022 19:03

Boymumsoymum · 06/06/2022 19:00

Definitely this. Life isn't easy, lots of us have to make tough decisions. I live 1.5hours away from my nearest family members because I can afford a higher standard of living here. Yes I'd love to be closer to family but.....choices. which is the lesser of 2 evils

I can't just move away from my job and my family. I already get help with my family for childcare and also for my mental health. I came out of an abusive relationship where I was nearly killed. Being near my family is part of my reviver plan. I absolutely cannot move for this reason.

OP posts:
ForestFae · 06/06/2022 19:03

Can you move areas? I’m from the north and the rents down south are absolutely ridiculous. I pay £700 mortgage for a 3 bed semi with 2 bathrooms and a garden. 900 for a two bed is a robbery.

Theres some nice places that have cheaper rates OP!

LakieLady · 06/06/2022 19:03

While UC is unlikely to cover all your rent in most areas because the Local Housing Allowance (LHA) is invariably lower than average rents, each LHA area is pretty large. Where I live, the average rent for a 2-bed is £1,300, in the nearby city, it's even higher. But 7 miles down the road in a different town, you can get a 2-bed for £1,100, which is almost exactly what UC will pay. It's worth exploring exactly which places near you are cheaper. Things will get easier moneywise once you qualify for free childcare.

Are you on the council's housing register? And do they know you are sharing a room with your child? You should be a slightly higher priority because of that. If you can provide evidence that your housing situation is having an adverse impact on your MH, that might increase your priority rating too. And ask to speak to a housing adviser at the council, they may have a network of private landlords who charge lower than average rents that they can refer you to.

There are some housing associations that take applications directly, rather than only accepting people from the housing list. Google and see if there are any in your area. This organisation helps people find HA properties in many different parts of the country: Places For People .

The housing situation in this country is dreadful. I worked with people in housing need for nearly 18 years, but it got tougher and tougher to find affordable housing from approx 2012, and I made a sideways move into welfare rights in 2018. Nearly all my former colleagues have moved on because of burnout.

I don't understand why there isn't a national bloody outcry about it, tbh.

BrownieBanana · 06/06/2022 19:04

I get some universal credit about half of son's childcare. Don't get any of my rent covered as I'm with family.

OP posts:
notanothertakeaway · 06/06/2022 19:04

OP, have you posted before? Your story is very familiar

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