To expect an update from the conveyancing solicitor ...

[shambolico]

... when I know my buyer's solicitor sent him some queries 3 weeks ago? Should the correspondence be copied to me? If I have heard nothing, is that because the queries are sitting in his intray untouched, or might he have just replied to them without telling me?

I have emailed and called for an update, but he hasn't responded.

Background: It should be a very simple probate sale of my mum's house because there is no chain and no mortgages involved. It took my solicitor 6 weeks to draft the contract, so I know he is swamped.

Unfortunately I had the same experience, had to chase up everything. Some very simple enquiries which I could respond to in a minute sat for weeks. One one occasion I came home from walking the dog in an area with poor mobile phone reception to over 20 increasingly urgent messages about an enquiry from the buyers solicitor. Subsequently when copied in to the response, I could see from the email trail that the enquiry had been made by the buyers solicitor 3 months earlier! On other occasions I was asked for information that I had already provided weeks before. So frustrating.
My advice, chase any issues, request regular updates and follow up every telephone message with an email to avoid the inevitable - "sorry message wasn't passed on". At the beginning I would wait for a response, like you thinking they must be busy, but laterly realised I was just being ignored so would contact daily until they replied - I was paying (a lot) for this service. I am not a solicitor/conveyancer but would have lost my job if my communication with clients was so poor.

Quite possible they have been responded to without your input but you are entitled to an update IMO (I'm a property solicitor).