Mil, hot water.

[TheCountessOfGrantham]

Annoyed.

MIL stayed over. Fine. Dh just got off the phone with her and she was apparently complaining like mad that we don't have a "hot water on demand service." She means a combi boiler. How the fuck it affected her I don't know, she can't use the bath due to mobility issues, we have three showers which all run nice and hot! She used one! The hot water comes on for an hour in the morning and again in the early evening, providing enough for baths and washing up if required. Not that she washed up. And we have a dishwasher anyway. Apparently she said that we seriously need to upgrade our system that's in perfect working order and she doesn't know how I can handle such a lack of hot water. Not him. Me. But the water is hot for most of the day! Seriously, there's only about two hours in the middle where it's not steaming hot.

We kept our old boiler and hot water tank after the plumber advised us against a combi boiler. I seriously don't understand what there was to complain about! Did she want to just run hot water down the sink? Or was she expecting a nice hot sink wash at 4am? Aibu to think she's a crotchety old mare?

'It works well for us' on repeat and then change the subject. If she doesn't want to stay over, no problem. She can stay in a nearby hotel.

Some people love to complain, does she have form for this?

Maybe she thinks she’s being helpful or something?

Yanbu though, it’s rude for any guest to go on and on about a perceived inconvenience. If she doesn’t like it she doesn’t need to stay over in the future.

I agree. He rid of the old boiler.. Your mil!!

Well yes she is out of order but to be honest this is just an eye roll, not something I'd be so worked up about to post.

Seeing as you only have it from your DH that she was 'complaining, is it possible that she was actually standing up for you (do you spend more time in the house than him?) telling him he shouldn't leave you stuck without a decent boiler and he's failing his husbandly duty.

Obviously if she's someone who just likes to moan about everything then YANBU.

I would do faux surprise, tell her that youve never been inconvenienced by it so have no idea what she means, and ask at what point was she affected by the lack of a combi boiler.

And see if she can actually give you an example where she was put out by it.

Probably, but I don't have anyone else to talk to right now, and this is a forum people use for such, so......

Oooh, no, she would never tell her baby that he was failing at husbandly duty!

Can you really not understand how someone would be annoyed at having to time showering or washing dishes to a particular schedule?

she is rude to complain about someone else’s home. If she doesn’t like the conditions, she can simply book a hotel next time she wants to visit. She should have just kept her opinion to herself and made a polite excuse to do just that the next time she was there.

We don’t have PILs over to stay/we don’t stay at theirs. We meet them on neutral territory and, on occasion, they stay in a hotel. Or we do. MIL is a grandiose narcissist.

Ask your DH to keep your MIL at arm’s length and put very clear boundaries in place to protect you from her exhausting, draining personality. If he can’t do that, reconsider your relationship.

Yes, I think you are being unreasonable to be so mad about it. My parents complain about all kinds of stuff that they think we should have to make our lives easier..stuff we don't need, never use and can't see the point of. But for them they think we are depriving ourselves. And yes, they are old and set in their ways and they do go on about stuff.

Unless there is a back story about your mil, if this is her only fault I'd let it go. She loves water on demand and thinks everyone should. Just ignore it.

I'll whisper this gently op. When we upgraded our boiler the gas bills reduced because it was more efficient.

However I understand about raging wrinklies. My mother is still offended that dd didn't have a pony Where were we to keep a pony in inner fucking London.

I’d tell her you can’t afford a new boiler and she can pay for one that suits her needs if she wishes

They don't? The showers are electric, they're hot all day and night. The water from the tap is also hot for the majority of the day!