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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to wait until he gets back to text?

8 replies

BrownieBanana · 04/06/2022 17:07

Avoiding texting the guy I'm seeing as had a horrible night. In and out of panic attacks all night after I had a bad dream and woke up screaming, sweating and punching myself (ptsd related). He's away, and has been texting to see how I am just generally. Just want to turn my phone off and disappear into a hole because I don't want to lie and say 'I'm fine'. I'm so tired and have been in and out of tears all day. I'll be fine tomorrow. Would be really shit to tell him what's happened whilst he's away with mates? It would wouldn't it? My brain is fried. This happens really rarely but when it does it is so big.

OP posts:
Original poster
BrownieBanana · 04/06/2022 17:08

I sound really daft but just can't think straight right now.

OP posts:
Testina · 04/06/2022 17:15

“the guy I’m seeing” sounds very new and casual?

This depends on what he knows, and what you want to gain from telling him about last night.

If he doesn’t know, I’d text, “had shocking sleep last night, knackered today - early night so don’t worry if I don’t reply later - have fun with your mates!”

If he’s your committed partner and knows about the PTSD and how in manifests like this, then I’d send the above but acknowledging the true cause - and reassure that you’re fine now. If committed partner and you want some love from him after an awful night - I would tell him. But not if he’s been supporting a lot and feeling that needs a break.

Too much unknown here! But “guy I’m seeing” doesn’t sound close.

Testina · 04/06/2022 17:16

Also: I’m sorry you’re going through this.

Original poster
BrownieBanana · 04/06/2022 17:17

Testina · 04/06/2022 17:15

“the guy I’m seeing” sounds very new and casual?

This depends on what he knows, and what you want to gain from telling him about last night.

If he doesn’t know, I’d text, “had shocking sleep last night, knackered today - early night so don’t worry if I don’t reply later - have fun with your mates!”

If he’s your committed partner and knows about the PTSD and how in manifests like this, then I’d send the above but acknowledging the true cause - and reassure that you’re fine now. If committed partner and you want some love from him after an awful night - I would tell him. But not if he’s been supporting a lot and feeling that needs a break.

Too much unknown here! But “guy I’m seeing” doesn’t sound close.

Sorry. It's been 6 or so months. Not had 'the talk' to make it official but we are v close. Just taking it slow because I have children and he hasn't met them yet.

OP posts:
SquishyGloopyBum · 04/06/2022 17:21

Just say you aren't feeling well and you are going to turn your phone off and try and sleep it off.

Original poster
BrownieBanana · 04/06/2022 17:21

SquishyGloopyBum · 04/06/2022 17:21

Just say you aren't feeling well and you are going to turn your phone off and try and sleep it off.

Yes, good idea.

OP posts:
GaspingGekko · 04/06/2022 17:23

Think I'd go with a non-committal "hanging in there" type message. You don't have to be honest, but you don't have to say you're fine either.

Original poster
BrownieBanana · 04/06/2022 17:26

GaspingGekko · 04/06/2022 17:23

Think I'd go with a non-committal "hanging in there" type message. You don't have to be honest, but you don't have to say you're fine either.

I think I might just not say anything at all as I'll probably be fine by the time he comes back. I worry about scaring him off with my 'issues' too. Shouldn't have started this thread. Sometimes just good to get those stupid little worries out.

OP posts:
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