To ask what a healthy teenaged girl's diet looks like

[Fishandchipstwice]

I have always struggled with my weight - I am losing weight now with an incredibly restrictive diet with the help of the GP - 2 stone to go!

I am determined that my daughter will not go the same way I did. She is currently 15 and is within the healthy BMI, although on the 70th percentile. Her diet is currently OK but she has expressed an interest to lose a bit of weight and I want to support her in this.

She would like to lose a stone. She is active and on the go lots.

She currently eats

• sugary cereal for breakfast so we are going to swap it for a low sugar version which is portion controlled


• A cheese wrap, crisps, carrot sticks, an apple and a box of raisins for lunch. She is going to get rid of the crisps but is wondering if she should forego any carbs at lunchtime.


• for tea we eat fairly healthy meals but need to look at portion size.


• She has one sweet treat a day (such as a mini chocolate bar) which she is reducing to one a week.


• She only drinks water unless it is a special occasion.

Does this sound OK? I have had such an awful relationship with food that I struggle to recognise what is 'normal'. Any advice gratefully received - thanks

It's the daughter who wants to though. Forbidding it would lead to more problems imo.

Is she actually overweight?

I’d be focused on nutrition above all else. Starting the day with cereal is bad for children, teenagers and adults. Porridge with full fat organic milk, fruit, eggs and whole grain sourdough (gut health CRUCIAL for mental health) with real butter or avocado and greens on the side. All great breakfasts / brunches.
Start the day off better, get fresh air everyday, and make it about health NOT weight.

OP,
You are getting a lot of stick here.
Similar aged DD here.
I get where you come from! But please dont worry.
Rather than focus on diet steer her towards fresh air and exercise.
I do know that it is harder to get teens to go for a walk as that is "boring".
If they are not the sporty kind it's very hard to get teen girls to do something active.
Would she like dance classes?

A lot of pressure from their peers to be instagram slim and shop at the trendiest stores (IMO they make clothes only fit for toddlers)
I would say your daughter's diet is ok.
Try swapping the cereal out as others have said.
After a lot of battle I only buy oatibix, weetabix and porridge now.
I got a pack of kellogs granola for half term and it didn't last 4 days with just one child!
It's very easy to scoff the unhealthy cereal easily and they hardly make us feel full until lunch time.

I worry a lot too as DD is on the heavier side, it bothers her and she is in tears when we go shopping.
Recently her dentist commented that her teeth are showing signs of cavities.
I know she has been helping herself to lots of sugary snacks at school.

As long as you don't have similar health concerns I would encourage you to advice your DD not to diet.
Read a similar thread here on MN where a poster said "food is to nourish rather than punish the body"
That really stuck with me.

If she's a healthy weight then for gods sake don't get her involved in any kind of restriction. It could trigger all sorts of problems in terms of her relationship with food and to be fair, if you have your own issues with weight and food you are already at risk of 'mismanaging' this situation.

Her diet sounds fine to me and if she is a healthy weight then not sure what the issue is?

People on here will tell you that you have to cut carbs or never eat raisins or whatever, but in reality most adults that are a healthy weight eat anything and everything. I've never been overweight in my life (I'm 42 and have had three children for context) and I eat chocolate every day. And bread. Not loads of either but balance is important and that's what you need to teach your daughter.

If she's looking to make healthy choices then there are obvious swaps - brown bread instead of the wrap, grapes instead of raisins etc as people have mentioned, but the goal here should be health and not weight loss.

If she is determined to look at her diet then I would seek help from the GP.

Sorry OP!
You already mentioned she is active and always on the go.
Ignore my ramblings then!

Why does want to lose a stone?
She’s a healthy BMI and not overweight.
Why would you tell her no carbs at lunch?
Honestly OP, this sounds like a bad idea.

If she’s not OW then maybe she can do other things like eat better quality food (rather than diet) and undertake some exercise she enjoys.

If she's a healthy weight and loses a stone, that could be like 10%+ of her body weight! Does she really need to lose that much?

How active is your dd?

What does she drink?

Grapes rather than raisins is probably better for teeth as well as health.

No no no. Stop with the enthusiastic support. You are projecting your issues onto her. Do not encourage her to diet. Provide healthy food. She can make healthy chouces with no input from you. Do not encourage her to fixate on portion control. If anything is likely to make her have lifeling weight issues, it's stepping onto the dieting rollercoaster in her teens. She is a healthy weight.

Op i feel youre on a one eay ticket to an eatong disorder.

It sounds fine, other than she could do with more protein and fibre for breakfast - so muesli or porridge with plain yogurt and a piece of fresh fruit, or eggs/peanut butter on whole meal toast with fresh fruit.

I mean this kindly, but be very careful about passing your food issues on. Does she really need to loose weight? If she does focus on healthy eating rather than dieting. Unless she doesn’t like chocolate, one mini bar a week is a bit miserable.

We really need to change our language around this. Weight, diet, cutting out, would not be words I use around my DD.

Can you not just change your focus to good quality food regardless of calorie content? Have fun cooking dips and making snacks and experimenting with new meals?

My dd is same age but will be 16 next month. She is 5ft7 and weighs 8st 4lb looks slim and in proportion and was weighed recently at hospital appointment that’s the only reason I know. She eats non stop so her day typically looks like this

• 3 crumpets with butter and jam *Snack fruit or malt loaf
• lunch bagel, strawberries, grapes, cherry tomatoes, cucumber, carrots, crisps
• after school snack, apple and 3 rich tea biscuits
• dinner chicken breast, caser salad, red pepper, cucumber, cherry toms, celery, red onion and pita bread
• pudding yogurt

A stone is a lot for a 15 year old girl who’s already a healthy weight. Where has she got the idea she needs to lose weight from?

Breakfast is either porridge with a bit of maple syrup, or sometimes this horrendous 'skinny crunch' cereal she likes, or weetabix.

Lunch is usually a wrap - tuna, chicken or cheese with salad, some hummus and mini cucumbers to dip, piece of fruit. Sometimes some crisps.

Cereal bar for after school as she stays on for a lot of clubs after school.

Evening meal - I'm vegan so generally cook a plant based meal we can all eat. Vegan spag Bol.chill/shepherds pie with soya mince or lentils, big curry with lots of veggies and chickpeas, jambalaya, minestrone, butter bean stew, vegan sausage traybake. Pudding is yoghurt, banana and custard, berries with yoghurt. Once a week I buy them a cadburys pot dessert, where you tip in the flake bits or whatever.

If she's hungry in the evening (she's a night owl) she'll make a snack of PB on toast, PB with apple slices to dip, or some olives or something.

Weekends we're a bit more lax and they have chocolate crepes and stuff for breakfast (she has a younger sibling too, they eat roughly the same).

Don't be silly. If that was the case 90% of the population would have an eating disorder.

You say shes active then she will need the carbs.

Porridge is awesome breakfast, make with full fat milk and add some raisins and mixed seeds.

Overnight oats works the same - I leave my oats in full fat greek yogurt with grated apple and frozen blueberries in fridge overnight then ready in morning.

Instead of depriving herself of daily treats why not have a mini roll or biscuit everyday. Deprivation could lead to binging.

I'd focus on exercise and eating for health. Making sure she gets enough fruit and veg and plenty of fibre. I started getting interested in lifiting weights at 15/16 and they really helped me look and feel better as you can see yourself getting stronger but be worth consulting with pt on where to start.

I don't think you should be encouraging her to lose weight - instead focus on improving fitness and toning up. Do not remove carbs, they are not the enemy. A breakfast higher in protein will keep her feeling satisfied for longer. Your proposal is too restrictive on treats. Be very careful with this, she's at a vulnerable age for eating disorders.

Please don't encourage her to lose weight, teen girls are at a high risk of developing anorexia and all that's needed is weight loss and the right genes.

My dd has anorexia and it's honestly the most heartbreaking illness. I wouldn't wish it on anyone.

Your dd should be able to eat freely, teens need lots of calories as their bodies and brains are still developing.

Have you got any thoughts about all these responses @Fishandchipstwice ?

There's no harm in swapping out sugary breakfast cereal for something more filling.
My main concern is you saying your daughter is on the 70th centile. If this is for weight, where is she for height? If she is the same or higher for height then she is absolutely fine. Even if that isn't the case, muscle weighs more than fat so if she is athletic then she could easily weigh more than friends of a similar height! Make sure she has plenty of protein, calcium and some fat. Full fat yoghurt with berries (fresh or frozen) can be a good alternative for breakfast or pudding and I think it also contains vitamin D.

Dieting at this age gave me a lifelong problem with food and a shit eating disorder.

I was also got very fat with the yoyoing.

Don't let her diet OP especially if she is a healthy weight.

My DD is 16. You can’t forbid them to diet. They are seeing all sorts online. I try and keep focus on healthy eating not diet, make sure we have lots of healthy options in, talk about stuff. She goes to gym and eats a lot protein. She makes oats or overnight weetabix with fancy toppings for breakfast copies stuff she’s seen online. I do watch that she’s eating as she is very slim. She eats all food groups. It’s not easy to navigate.
If you ban her from dieting all she’ll do is skip breakfast and throw away lunch at school. Far more dangerous than letting her eat more healthily and buying oats not coco pops for breakfast etc.

At 15 she’s still growing and doesn’t need to be on a diet or cutting carbs.

I would change the sugary cereals in the morning, but only because she would be fuller with something more substantial. Perhaps scrambled eggs on toast, an omelette or spelt pancakes.

Tell your dd that she’s perfect as she is.

Weetabix is a fair choice and easy.

What’s this “stone” she wants to lose? It sounds like she eats a pretty healthy diet. She’s active?

I think we are unacceptable of everyone’s bodies and being body positive. Size 6/8 is not sustainable. If you don’t have a teeny frame and your genetically predisposed to have a body that small.