How the f do you meet likeminded people?

[Namechangefeelingdown]

I'm a lone parent. I have a few 'mum friends' who like to go out and have coffees and play dates etc, but really struggling to meet anyone who likes what I like, aka a really bloody good night out dancing all night. I work from home so colleagues live all over the country. I have tried meetup groups (there's only one near me) and that was an epic fail as it was all just really awkward. Bar just going out on my own and hoping I meet someone who will have a dance with me like a massive loser, how do I go about meeting people? It's so hard. I moved cities just before covid hit and now I'm feeling lonely and friendless...

do you work in a large organisation? My friends who are still single/ no kids mainly go out with work colleagues after work and carry on from there.
I’ll be honest I think you’d struggle to get many mums with similar age kids out- I like to go for dinner but clubbing like pre kids is my idea of hell.

Is there an amateur dramatics group? Because they are often piss ups disguised as theatre.

Ah yes, walking group, book clubs and church- the best place to meet fellow ravers

Yes I still do it occasionally at over 40. I have kids.

It's all about the drinks after the event. That can occur anywhere. Just because you like walking or reading doesn't mean you don't also like a drink and a night out.

My point is you have to try many things before something sticks.

I agree you need to find your interest group and then take it from there. I think quite a few people, given a few drinks and childcare sorted for the evening, are happy to let their hair down!

I'm not specifically looking for mums to go out with 😅

I don’t really have any advice but wanted to say you sound brilliant.

I was lucky - I have friends who decided to remain child free and so are still well up for a pub-based piss up or a night on the town.

What was awkward about the Meet-up group?

@Namechangefeelingdown I'm a single parent to two boys and I absolutely love a good night out! Although my youngest is still a little toddler so the nights out are on hold atm 😬 There are still some of us out there 🙈

I'm 45 and have no one to go out dancing with either!! I love trance & drum n bass.
I find it relaxing actually.

Going to a local Caribbean festival soon with my colleagues but I think they're more into the rum than the music... however. I will dance if I can.

There is a Facebook group I'm on called I think Raved in the 90s and lots of 40 & 50 somethings on there either miss dancing all night or still go raving...

I tried joining a book group as I love reading too but was the youngest by 20 years. And not my type of books.

I do have some good close friends but the ones who liked going out now have young families. I love my friends to bits, I just need one extra mate who enjoys a good night out!!

OP, your post really resonated with me. I’m due my first soon and am worried about this exact scenario. To be fair, I don’t like ‘clubbing’ anymore (I’m 35) but I like a nice bar with like a DJ in the corner or good music playing and get dresssed up and out for cocktails/ a few vinos etc. So many of my friends that have already got children just don’t want to do this anymore and I’m worried that once I have this baby, I’ll only make the type of ‘mum friends’ that want to go to baby groups and tea/ coffee. I’ll still really want a nice night out once every 6 weeks or something. Just something to look forward to and a laugh.

Really worried that I won’t find ‘my people’ in that respect.

No advice sadly, though you could try posting on local FB groups or join the Peanut app to see if you can find any like minded women?

POF used to have meet up nights in my area - they were nearly always in a pub or club

You do sound fab!
I'm a good few years older than you but my child is the same age and I still love dancing all night (well until 3am maybe 🤣). I'm still the same woman who pre kid used to go out dancing, have a couple of hours sleep and a strong coffee then go to work all day!

Not sure what to suggest to meet energetic people ha.
What about local dance classes/zumba?
The gym/power yoga
Park runs?

If you're brave, go to gigs by yourself, sometimes there's an after party. I've done that a couple of times and always found some dancing friends.
Good luck!