Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be angry with my Mum

6 replies

Theblacksheepandme · 02/06/2022 15:11

I don't quite know how to start without waffling. I did the ancestry DNA and found out who I thought my biological Father was is not and an old family friend is. My biological Father is a long time dead and so is my Dad that raised me.

It wasn't a surprise and I sort of did the DNA to search for answers. I was always treated as the black sheep of the family and there was a lot of arguments and toxicity within the family. When my Dad that raised me died it just got worse. My Dad was lovely and really was the only person that made me feel loved. My Mum is toxic. I have been nc with my Mum and family for 10 years.

Anyway, I confronted my Mum and she did a President Clinton and said she did not have sexual relations with this man.
I have cousins from this persons side of the family. It is so upsetting and I am so angry with her. I asked some of my brothers and one of my sisters. One brother said he didn't know, the other brother pretended that he didn't know who I was even talking about and my sister told me I was causing trouble and told me off. I have been watching a Stacey Dooley programme on DNA and it has triggered all sorts of feelings. This man died when I was a teenager and I was at his graveside when he died. Did everyone know but me? I have had counselling but I just wish my Mum would tell the truth.

OP posts:
Whowhatwherewhenwhynow · 02/06/2022 15:14

Wow that it so wrong of your mum to lie to you.
then to treat you badly as a result.

I imagine it’s a lot more common than we know for people to not know their true father.

AryaStarkWolf · 02/06/2022 15:18

I'm so sorry that she did that to you and also that no one is even sympathetic to you now you've found out, how cruel of them :(

Does this man have any family? Any other kids who may be your siblings?

Theblacksheepandme · 02/06/2022 15:22

Yes he has a son.

OP posts:
AryaStarkWolf · 02/06/2022 15:29

Theblacksheepandme · 02/06/2022 15:22

Yes he has a son.

Have you/would you contact him?

Theblacksheepandme · 02/06/2022 15:48

@AryaStarkWolf
When I spoke to one of my cousins through the DNA ancestry, she told me that he wasn't very nice so I don't know. I have had enough toxicity to last me a lifetime. I am happy with my little family.

OP posts:
Theblacksheepandme · 02/06/2022 16:01

I used to go to my biological Father's house with my Mum and Dad. Him and his wife and son would be there. His son was in his early 20's and I was quite young. Do you know I don't think I was even a teenager when my biological Dad died? I distinctly remember having a strong bond with him. His son would be a good bit older than me. I wonder does he know already?

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread