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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Teenagers next door

108 replies

purplephazersettostun · 01/06/2022 13:20

My neighbour has two teenage children. One sitting A-level and one GCSE's which means they're on study leave apart from exams.

They have a kind of teenage snug at the end of their garden - glorified shed really with lights and speakers etc. This means that from 11am every day they are blasting (bad) dance music till 11pm at night. The night time I can cope with, but I work from home, and the only place I can work is the dining room - which is their side of the house. I am really struggling with working and having meetings with incessant music and screeching of teens. I mentioned it to neighbour who rolled her eyes and said to just ignore it.

I've got 3 months of this ahead of me! I don't have an office I can work from to escape it. And soon I will want the window open too. How can I explain that this is an issue and that EVERY SINGLE DAY and constant music isn't really acceptable?

OP posts:
CoralBells · 02/06/2022 11:48

lljkk · 01/06/2022 18:05

I'm gonna suggest something super radical.
Which is that OP TALK to the teenagers.
Lean over the fence & explain the situation and ask them to be quieter. Spell out times you're working & where you would be sitting, what you can hear, & why it matters and try to bend over backwards about things like noise 6-11pm on Friday & Saturday.

Teens are used to adults setting boundaries. They are idealistic about being responsible citizens. They hate idea of adults spying on them & knowing their business. Which could be their own fault for being so oblivious and that's embarrassing to them, to boot. Even more so if mum is a partying chum: they may rebel by wanting to be hyper considerate & responsible. So be positive in a "of course you're nearly adults & I know you want to be good neighbours' tone of voice when you talk to them.

Give them a chance to rise to being their best selves.

The op has already raised the issue with the neighbour and been brushed off.

Somanysocks · 02/06/2022 12:23

Do the 15khz thing and see if it works, just tested it on myself and I can hear up to 10khz and it's pretty awful. I'm in my fifties.

Desperate measures Op.

BarrowInFurnessRailwayStation · 02/06/2022 12:28

Get a mosquito infrasound generator. If they complain they know what to do to restore harmony 🙂

GirlInACountrySong · 02/06/2022 12:28

It will soon be 6 weeks of screeching 7 and 8 year old girls on the trampoline/paddling pool and screaming toddlers

You can't really do much it's life!

WFH is unfortunate but the neighbourhood proximities must have been a consideration when you took the job?

BarrowInFurnessRailwayStation · 02/06/2022 12:37

You can just about hear this if you hold it close to your ear. It causes pain, sickness, disorientation and dizziness.

GirlInACountrySong · 02/06/2022 12:38

Do these items everyone is recommending work on little kids,babies, toddlers? Or just teenagers?

Pancakeorcrepe · 02/06/2022 12:43

This would drive me demented 😩😩😩

BarrowInFurnessRailwayStation · 02/06/2022 12:50

GirlInACountrySong · 02/06/2022 12:38

Do these items everyone is recommending work on little kids,babies, toddlers? Or just teenagers?

Yes, they work on young people whose hearing is more acute. Unless you had babies, toddlers etc. living next door to you, the sound wouldn't effect them because it doesn't travel very far, it remains localised.

DuckbilledSplatterPuff · 02/06/2022 13:01

Curiosity101 · 01/06/2022 13:45

There are noise cancelling headphones designed for use in places like call centres that would fix your problem. Myself and DH bought a pair each so that we can work next to eachother in the same home office.

We've got Jabra Evolve2 85 and Jabra Evolve 75.

This and also ask your neighbours again. They've basically just dismissed what you said and rolled their eyes. Be specific.
Also. Tell them their teens can start a "Silent Disco" phase ( you can buy kits for this.. everyone listens to the music on headphones) during work hours.

Speak to Noise control too and ask what they can do about it and what they recommend

AnotherForumUser · 02/06/2022 13:07

skybluee · 01/06/2022 17:37

I'm surprised bees like alcohol, I would've thought they were teatotal tbh.

Show quote history

Oh bees do like a wee dram of fermented nectar. But like many drunks they are banned from entry to the hive... fantasticfacts.net/2770/

AngelinaFibres · 02/06/2022 13:13

Alliumpoppyrose · 01/06/2022 13:56

Download or look up "15000 Hz 15 kHz Sine Wave" on you tube or internet.
Play this on an outdoor speaker or portable blue tooth speaker placed as close to their shed as possible on your side of fence and hide it with plastic sheet or cammo net. Generally older people will not hear it and its difficult to record to report.

Play it when they go out, no one will hear it apart from them. leave it going on full volume on repeat. As its high pitch its poor at penetrating solid walls so no one should hear it in side the house. If they complain just claim you have a cat scarer and you cannot turn it off 😄

Also called mosquitos . Brilliant for moving teens on. They may just move their loud music inside the house though. Are you in a semi.

AngelinaFibres · 02/06/2022 13:17

skybluee · 01/06/2022 17:30

I can't believe 20% of people think this is OK.

Presumably 20 % of people are 'fun mums'. God help their neighbours.

UnshakenNeedsStirring · 02/06/2022 13:22

Who are the 19% that voted you are being unreasonable? May be they are the scummy types who generate a lot of noise.
OP complain to your council. Take the recordings and just keep complaining to the council

SirChenjins · 02/06/2022 13:23

YA definitely NBU - selfish behaviour from them. Like PPs I wouldn’t have dared disturb our neighbours at that age and my own teens weren’t allowed to either. Whether you’re wfh or just going about your day to day living, you have a right to do that without that level of noise being imposed on you. I’d be straight onto the council - you’ve asked nicely, they’ve stuck their middle finger up to you, now it’s time to make it formal.

Blinky21 · 02/06/2022 13:38

Tell then you'll report them to the council unless they turn it down, councils will investigate noise nuisance at any time of the day and most will first send a letter. They are taking the piss suggesting you work somewhere else, don't stand for being bullied

debwong · 02/06/2022 13:41

Why on Earth did your no-mow May (a lovely thing to do) annoy your fun-mum neighbour?

GirlInACountrySong · 02/06/2022 13:43

Noise has to be extremely loud to hit the env health screening equipment parameters

FrecklesMalone · 02/06/2022 13:48

PizzaPizza56 · 01/06/2022 14:14

Why can't you work from the office? I went back in as soon as we could because the logistics of wfh weren't practical.

I'm permantly based at home. What a weird comment

MolkosTeenageAngst · 02/06/2022 13:53

Please don’t play this. I’m mid-30s and can hear it very clearly. It’s not only audible to teenagers. Younger adults and children will hear it too and it is an awful noise. It would be incredibly antisocial to your other neighbours to play something like this.

MolkosTeenageAngst · 02/06/2022 13:53

MolkosTeenageAngst · 02/06/2022 13:53

Please don’t play this. I’m mid-30s and can hear it very clearly. It’s not only audible to teenagers. Younger adults and children will hear it too and it is an awful noise. It would be incredibly antisocial to your other neighbours to play something like this.

Sorry, that was in reply to the Mosquito YouTube video - thought I had quoted it but obviously didn’t work!

mm40 · 02/06/2022 13:58

Thankfully when we’re younger we lived in an enormous Manor House and had our own wings (4 children) to entertain our friends in (and not smoke dope and drink vodka) and didn’t even disturb members of the same house. Can you just buy a mansion in the middle of nowhere

BarrowInFurnessRailwayStation · 02/06/2022 14:00

GirlInACountrySong · 02/06/2022 13:43

Noise has to be extremely loud to hit the env health screening equipment parameters

No it doesn't.

BarrowInFurnessRailwayStation · 02/06/2022 14:01

MolkosTeenageAngst · 02/06/2022 13:53

Sorry, that was in reply to the Mosquito YouTube video - thought I had quoted it but obviously didn’t work!

Show quote history

The sound has very limited range. It's not going to upset the street. It's got to be in the near vicinity in order to be detectable.

Rosebel · 02/06/2022 14:07

I know you have talked to the neighbour but did you actually speak to the teenagers? They might react the same as their parents but they might surprise you.
Offer them a compromise like playing music after 5 or 6 but not before.

GirlInACountrySong · 02/06/2022 14:09

@BarrowInFurnessRailwayStation well it did when we had the equipment installed for a few days for the neighbours noise

Uncarpeted adjoining house, not down the bottom of the garden

They did warn us it had to be a certain amount of decibels within a measured timeframe

What's the criteria now then?