Abandoning job for health?

[Sandsout]

Be so grateful for advice. Am kicking myself.

I have had busy, stressful, public sector jobs for 25 years. 2 primary age children, great husband..but work takes over my entire life. I sleep badly due to work anxiety. 70 hour weeks normal.

I have been in serious, debilitating pain since Wednesday of last week. Not able to eat or sleep or function. GP clear I have acute gastritis and most likely a stomach ulcer.

Will need a complete change in diet and remove dairy gluten sugar alcohol etc to mend, as well as medication. In some ways I'm happy to be given a kick start to improve my health.

But I'm so cross with myself that work stress has helped me get in this state, and even with the pain and the wake up call, I'm still working as there is so much to do, and I feel I'd be letting the local population down as well as my staff and colleagues etc.

Wwyd - do I need to accept I need to step back? I am terrified I will be in this sort of recurrent pain for life, but clearly not terrified enough to immediately step back. And I know in my heart I need to

Get signed off for a while. I'm assuming you can afford to if you're talking of quitting.
At least if you're on SSP you'll have a little bit of money and a job to return to if you want it.

Yes, you put you first.
If you dropped dead tomorrow you would be replaced at work.

Health is literally the single most important thing in life. Everything else is fixable, changeable, or you can find a way around it. Don’t gamble with your health.

in your shoes, I would step back from work and see if I could find a therapist. You’re going to deal with guilt and stress in other forms if you aren’t able to get to the bottom of why you feel driven to work yourself into the ground. I’m saying that with genuine care, not as a criticism.

Are you in the police? It sounds horribly familiar.

Firstly, if you were run over by a bus tomorrow, there'd be aperiod of grieving then they'd recruit to replace you and that would be the end of that.... No one, and I mean no one, is indispensible. Inconvenient to replace, but not indispensible

Secondly, what would you say to an employee in your boat? You'd tell them to take a few weeks off sick and review their position then.

I've had a few tears in my stomach lining over the years - not stress - and that was hellish enough. Get the treatment, sort your diet, take a few weeks, hell take a few months off sick and get better.

Your work will still be standing when you get back.

If you rephrased it currently as the fact that you are abandoning your health for a job which could probably replace & not give you a second thought in a month, does that help?

What is the reason for the 70 hours?

job culture?
poor job description?
management role?
poor manager?
your conscience?
imposter syndrome/your confidence?

something else?

OP

firstly, I get recurrent gastritis, and there is no reason to cut as many things out of your diet unless a gastro has told you to? Whilst in the acute phase you want to blend foods like if you were recovering from a stomach bug long term just be sensible.

Secondly, my dad has just been made redundant after working 80+ weeks for the past 40 years. Company are shitting all over him. He’ll never get back all the missed school plays/parents evenings etc etc that he missed to put work first. Don’t be like him. Recognise that you working those hours is due to your employer not resourcing your job properly NOT any shortcomings in yourself.

hope you feel better soon, it sucks. In a flare I put a piece of salmon, half a bag of white rice and chopped courgette in a Bowl, cover and microwave. Sprinkle with soy sauce, eat. Gentle, tasty and quick and doesn’t seem to make things worse.

plus, you know no ibuprofen/nsaids??