I’m 46, married, 4 kids. 5ft 2, 14.10, size 18/20. I have a job that’s is OK, the hours suit me as far as the kids are concerned but I left my career behind a long time ago.
Dh seems happy to bumble along and is mostly focused on paying off our mortgage and debt before we retire. Chances of us being able to retire before we reach early 70s is slim.
We live as friends. I don’t know if it’s because that part of our relationship is dead or because I’m so disgusted with myself physically that I’ve shut the door on sex. Either way, DH doesn’t seem bothered. I couldn’t stick to a diet if you paid me.
Maybe it’s a case of comparison being the thief of joy - everyone else seems to be slim, happy and not in debt.
I just can’t find joy in anything. As long as my kids are alright I struggle to care about anything else.
I just feel so sad and so guilty for feeling this way.
I just a slap, right?