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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this is doable?

21 replies

YellowLego · 23/05/2022 17:00

Been offered a new that I’m considering accepting. Job is a 16K payrise from what I’m currently doing. But (why is there always a but) two days a month it will involve a monster commute. 4 hours each way! The rest of the time it’s WFH. I think it would be fine. DH thinks I’m mad. Who wins?

OP posts:
HSKAT · 23/05/2022 17:01

I would.
Always travel down the night before etc

Furrydogmum · 23/05/2022 17:01

Are the 2 days consecutive? Even if not you could stay over in a cheapie hotel and still be quids in..

ethelredonagoodday · 23/05/2022 17:02

I'd think two days a month is doable?

Original poster
YellowLego · 23/05/2022 17:03

No not consecutive unfortunately. I think I would have to stay night before too.

OP posts:
TaranThePigKeeper · 23/05/2022 17:05

No reasonable employer would expect you to do four hours each way in the same day, so I am sure that the expectation would be for you to either travel there the evening prior, or to stay over after you finish in the office on the day you’ve travelled. Would this be driving, and getting there in time to do a normal 9-5? It would be v unusual if so. Maybe get some greater clarity about how it is supposed to work.

Original poster
YellowLego · 23/05/2022 17:05

No this is getting a train. I could drive and it would be 2.5 hours but I hate driving.

OP posts:
Bunty55 · 23/05/2022 17:07

For 16K extra? It's a no brainer. Will pay the electric bill :)

TaranThePigKeeper · 23/05/2022 17:08

YellowLego · 23/05/2022 17:05

No this is getting a train. I could drive and it would be 2.5 hours but I hate driving.

Ah, well, it would probably be doable if you drove, so they might not support staying over if it is just a preference. Did you have to be able to drive as part of the person spec?

Jedsnewstar · 23/05/2022 17:10

I would go on a tax calculator and work out the extra monthly pay. Say it is £1000 extra take home a month. How much would the commute cost in train/car?

Once you have the figures decide how much the job prospects would be in this new role. Plus how much you would likely enjoy the job.

It sounds like you already want to go for it.

TunaSalad · 23/05/2022 17:10

I would learn to love driving for an extra 16k, but still stay over the night before so you don't have to travel in rush hour. Even if you had to pay yourself a cheap premier inn won't eat up too much of the pay increase.

PakkaMakka · 23/05/2022 17:13

For me it would depend on how much time I'm in the other location. I regularly drive 2-3hrs to a site, have a couple of meetings and drive back. For me thats doable because although it's a long day, I'm not doing full 9-5 while there.
You would need to check your employer's expectations though; in my role, driving to the venue was assumed and we weren't funded for an overnight stay unless it was 3hrs drive or more. Unless there was a good reason why we couldn't drive (eg disability) they wouldn't pay for a train + accommodation (where we live, the train was sadly an expensive and inefficient mode of transport due to multiple changes/long gaps between connections)

Watchkeys · 23/05/2022 17:15

How will it impact your husband? Why does he need to be right on this?

Original poster
YellowLego · 23/05/2022 17:36

Watchkeys · 23/05/2022 17:15

How will it impact your husband? Why does he need to be right on this?

He will have to take the kids to breakfast club and pick up from after school club those days, which may mean rejigging his schedule. But I sort it all of the other days so don’t think it’s really too much to ask

OP posts:
Watchkeys · 23/05/2022 17:58

And have you asked him if he's willing to make that sacrifice? You don't really know why he doesn't want you to do it, or if he actually does want you not to do it.

It's fine for him to think you're barmy and still go ahead, as long as you're not asking for anything he's not comfortable doing/giving.

mewkins · 23/05/2022 17:58

I can't believe he would forego an extra 16k because he doesn't want to do the school run twice a month. Would he do the same in his job ? Turn down a promotion and payrise because it was slightly less convenient for you?

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 23/05/2022 18:00

Dh does this - about once a week, he gets a very early train down to London from Glasgow, does his day’s work, and comes back home - he gets in late, but he finds it workable, especially as he can work on the train.

Georgeskitchen · 23/05/2022 18:08

For an extra 16k I would stand in my head and sing the entire Beatles back catalogue.......in German 😀😀

shiningstar2 · 23/05/2022 18:09

£16.000 payrise? 2 days long travel but wfh rest of time??? Wow I wouldn't be turning that down op. I don't know if they would give expenses to stay over but even if not worth it for £16000 pay rise. Train down night before. Stay over, rest on train after work full Ming back. Two long days twice a month then wfh. Great. I would imagine that is far less time commuting than most people have in an average month. I would go for it.

Summersolargirl · 23/05/2022 18:14

For two and a half hours would you not consider driving? I’d there and back it in a day for that.

Homemadearmy · 23/05/2022 18:19

Is there a option to drive part way to make the commute easier and shorter?

Bigsighall · 23/05/2022 18:24

It’s what I do (well a 3.5 hour drive). It’s fine. I usually get a cheap hotel the night before

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