To be really scared of public speaking

[Tigerlily1985]

I have recently been given a big promotion which I am really pleased about. I knew Id have to do more public speaking as part of the job but now it's here I'm terrified.

I have the first one tomorrow in front of 16 people and the thought alone is making me so nervous. I am rehearsing it all day today but I know I will still clam up/dry mouth/ loose track of what I'm saying.

It's a really important presentation and I'm worried work will think they have made the wrong decision hiring me if I mess it up!

Why do I get so nervous? No one else seems to get like this. Even in smaller meetings then it's my turn to speak my heart starts to go crazy!!!

Such good tips here. I also get very nervous although people never seem to notice - im always told I'm relaxed and confident, which goes to show people often have no idea of the inner turmoil underneath the surface!

I always have water and Bachs rescue remedy throat sweets on hand - calms me beforehand.

I also hugely recommend learning a couple of yogic breathing techniques. You can use these before the presentation/meeting, and even during if there is a gap.
There are various calming techniques, but the one I use most is called nadi shodhana- basically breathing in through one nostril for a count of 4, hold your breath for 6, then exhale through the other nostril for 6. It forces your mind to focus on counting and breathing properly and it slows down my tendency to hyperventilate when nervous because I'm breathing in too much and not breathing out enough!
Plenty of other simple techniques though that you can use, I just find that one particularly effective for calming nerves.

Another trick is to have a "grounding" object, like a bracelet or a ring, or even a little trinket in your pocket. And you touch it when you're nervous or panicky and the idea is it brings you back to the present and let's you focus.

You'll be great OP. It's normal to hate it, and like you I can sometimes get into a terrible state. But! It can be overcome :-)

I don’t disagree with the recommendations here around practice and massive over prep. It can all help and it was my go to strategy for ages.

The problem I had was that I was presenting so much that the over preparation and practice itself was relentless and so time consuming that I had no life. Propranolol, which I’ve been using since 2002, just did away with the need for most of that and now I can just wing it if I want to. I don’t wing it because that’s not who I am, but the endless grind of prep/stress/execute/repeat is gone and my stress levels dropped about 98%. Do a bit of googling on this.

Some think this is cheating somehow - that’s a common view in the classical music community where it’s often used for solo performance work. It is cheating in golf (putting!) and snooker. In the business world, bugger that, it’s each person for themselves 😂😂

Propanolol is very good for this

I think Propanol would probably be the answer too. I get the nerves so bad I feel like I'm going to pass out, and now I just actively avoid any situation where public speaking is required (I have GAD too which doesn't help). I always felt that mine was more a physical reaction than just feeling nervous, like my flight/fight response would kick in immediately and I'd get the racing heart, sweating, nausea etc. I think the Propanol would massively help with this so I could get the physical symptoms out of the way and focus. Sadly my GP said it would be foolish of me to take them because I have asthma, so that's not an option for me but maybe something to think about, as PPs have suggested.

Good luck!

Thanks everyone! I have been practicing all day so I am hoping I nearly know it by heart.

I'm really interested in the propanol- can a gp just prescribe that? I don't think I'll get it in time as I won't be able to speak to a gp easily.

Yes it’s a very common medication mainly used to lower blood pressure. Been around for decades so well understood and GP s can prescribe. Very cheap too and you don’t need that much. Non addictive.

When I went to see my GP to ask for it I was expecting a lecture of some sort but he just said “oh for public speaking…I use it for that too, it’s excellent”.

Propanol is a miracle pill for this. See if you can get a Samedaydoctor appointment (comes at a cost) and get a prescription. You may have time.

Longer term get a repeat prescription prescription and it will change your life.

I echo Toastmasters longer term.

I was on propranolol when I finally passed my driving test, so it might slso be worth considering.