To be suspicious of this new neighbour

[kimfox]

A man I've never seen before just came round and knocked on the door (I'd seen him passing and looking at my front garden so he'd obviously doubled back to come to the door). His opening gambit was that he wasn't a JW - so far so good. Said he'd just moved "back" in down the road as he grew up around here, then asked if we have a fly problem round these parts! We don't live near a lake or in a pine forest so I thought that was odd - asked if I thought he needed to get fly screens? My answer: Umm, well like anywhere you might get a few mozzies in the summer and you could get fly screens if you want?

Then he complimented me on our front garden and said could he come round another time to ask what plants grow well around here. (I'm hardly Alan Titchmarsh!! If it doesn't die from neglect it's a great plant for my garden!) When he started talking about the plants "would it be OK if I.." I thought he was going to ask to have some of them like another CF neighbour I didn't know once did because "I had plenty to go around"!!

All quite innocuous I suppose but I felt like he wanted me to invite him in. WIBU to think all this was slightly odd, and to definitely NOT want him in our house, or is he just a nice chap recently returned from abroad who is just looking to meet the neighbours and I'm being an unfriendly cow-bag?

That would creep me out to but he could genuinely have nobody and be just trying to meet people or he could be a serial killer who knows. Maybe ask some of your other neighbours if they've had any dealings with him

That's what I thought - I'd think it would have sat better if I'd happened to be out there, and the conversation had happened more organically. "Hello! Lovely garden!"
"Oh thanks, it's not bad is it?"
"I'm Tom by the way, just moved in down the road" etc

But fly problem?! Errrr, what?! We are popping in to another neighbour later to discuss a planning application (such an exciting road) I will ask if they've met him..

'Don't worry, I'm not...' is always an attempt at a scam in my experience.

It all felt a bit "forward". And perhaps his intro was what set off my inner cynic.. glad it was me that went to the door, DH is much friendlier & would probably had him in for a cuppa there and then

Listen to your gut instinct.

You do not have to be nice to anyone. Let alone a random man.

He grow up round there ... I wonder if you now live where he used to, or where a good friend of his used to live? And maybe he was fishing to see what the house is like now ...

That would probably make me wary too. Did he give you a name, and are you sure he lives where he said he does. I think I'd be trying to suss that out whilst remaining polite but distant unless he gives you any reason not to.

Maybe his fly problem is coming from his basement 😱 Just kidding 😐

Thanks for that - I do worry sometimes that I don't make any much effort with the neighbours, so thought maybe this was just me being unnecessarily stand off-ish. (I just don't want to be in the pocket of near neighbours so im pleasant, but don't have them round - I like to keep them at arms length. A few of my local friends like to know everyone's business so I leave it to them & find out anything interesting third hand!)

It sounds perfectly ok to me. Maybe it is odd for him moving back and ot knowing anyone and he was trying to connect with the community. Sounds like he was just being clumsy/needed an excuse to talk.

Yes that occurred to me because we once had a letter from someone wanting to see the house as they used to live in it - allegedly! He said the house he's now in was his grandparents so stayed in it often (I asked) .. but that could be rubbish - but why make it up?! Going to assume that may be true.

Nutcase . Disengage.

😂No - but I will check it out with others who pay more attention to who lives where - he probably does live there - he was just passing & looked like he decided to knock on the spur of the moment. He told me the house number.

WIBU to think all this was slightly odd, and to definitely NOT want him in our house, or is he just a nice chap recently returned from abroad who is just looking to meet the neighbours and I'm being an unfriendly cow-bag?

I don’t see how you could really know for sure after one random conversation.
If you see him again follow him home and report back.

Maybe.. could be completely harmless & a great laugh of course..I'm not having a random stranger around just yet though. I can't get over the flies. Or inviting himself back. Perhaps it's a hangover from my upbringing but I always think you should wait to be invited..