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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask for your CF stories

39 replies

icanonlydosomuch · 19/05/2022 21:54

I love a CF story so it would be great to hear any new ones please!

OP posts:
fluffycereal · 19/05/2022 21:56

Do you have any of your own or is it just research?

icanonlydosomuch · 19/05/2022 21:59

Not research. I've just seen that someone has posted one and it made me realise how much I "enjoy" reading them!

OP posts:
Nevergoingtobemrsjones · 19/05/2022 22:29

my Mother used to take me shopping at tesco
shed not only fiddle her timesheets,she’d charge me petrol and for every £100 I’d spend,she’d spend less than £20
shed collect the points and when the money off vouchers came,I wouldn’t get a sniff of them
she went mental when I told her I wasn’t going with her and was planning on going to Asda from now on

i was on benefits years ago and got milk tokens
every month she’d demand them and spend them on milk for herself-she’d happily take milk from the mouths of her grandchildren
my life would have been made hell if I didn’t

she bought my son a bike from a car boot-didn’t bother to tell me,and told him I could pay her the £50 it cost at £5 a week
i paid,but made a note of every time I did until it hit the £50
I told her I’d paid her back-every penny
she stood outside my house,shrieking that I owed her £50
and the brakes where non existent-I know nothing about bikes so didn’t realise-my son broke his arm on the damn thing
i rang her to beg her to have the other kids so I could get him to hospital and was told she was clearing out my baby stuff from the attic so couldnt
i got my friend to sit with them while I was in a&e with him-my son had to stay in hospital overnight
she went to pick him up the next day with 3 of her friends in tow-I’m guessing to show what a great Nan she is-and threw a tantrum as I hadn’t rang to give permission for him to go with her

i had a two bed house years ago,with 3 kids,pnd and was barely coping
she moved my brother in,told him he wasn’t to pay rent,or luxuries like food or gas but told me he’d help with the kids
he did fuck all-just took over my house-banned me from coming home through the day,ate all my food,ran my bills up by over double and left endless mess everywhere for me to pick up
i threw him out after 3 weeks
and I was the bad guy

i do cross stitch as a hobby
she bought me a cross stitch kit and told me to do it
demanded it was to be finished in 4 days-it took me over 5 weeks and when it was finished,she tried to charge me for the kit,the frame and the bloody nail to hang it up!

im now nc-I could write a book on her cf ways

lifecanbehardattimes · 20/05/2022 02:57

@Nevergoingtobemrsjones

Jeez, she sounds like a nightmare. Well done for going NC

savethatkitty · 20/05/2022 03:09

𝐍𝐨𝐭 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐂𝐅, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐞𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐌𝐈𝐋. 𝐖𝐞'𝐝 𝐠𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐚 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐥, 𝐃𝐇 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐩𝐚𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐬 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐝𝐧'𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 2 𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐫𝐮𝐛 𝐭𝐨𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫. 𝐒𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐮, 𝐭𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐛𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐩𝐮𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐝 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐬𝐧'𝐭 𝐡𝐮𝐧𝐠𝐫𝐲.

KyaClark · 20/05/2022 03:51

savethatkitty · 20/05/2022 03:09

𝐍𝐨𝐭 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐂𝐅, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐞𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐌𝐈𝐋. 𝐖𝐞'𝐝 𝐠𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐚 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐥, 𝐃𝐇 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐩𝐚𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐬 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐝𝐧'𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 2 𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐫𝐮𝐛 𝐭𝐨𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫. 𝐒𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐮, 𝐭𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐛𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐩𝐮𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐝 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐬𝐧'𝐭 𝐡𝐮𝐧𝐠𝐫𝐲.

My husband's niece did similar. We went out for food and she ordered the double chicken pitta (instead of a single) and then stated she wasn't hungry so didn't eat any of it. Why order the bigger version?!

WiddlinDiddlin · 20/05/2022 04:04

I think your mums more an abusive arse than a CF @Nevergoingtobemrsjones glad you are NC with her!

My sister..

A friend who is a fabulous and wonderful illustrator was asking for videos of cats making odd noises - my sister has a cat that makes odd noises. I asked if she had any videos as friend is putting together a book of cat behaviour.

Sisters first question 'will I get paid'...

She delivers food. She meets a lot of dogs belonging to customers who would benefit from some training (tbh, both the customers and the dogs). I used to go to peoples homes and train dogs.

She asked if she could take some of my biz cards and offer them to customers if they seemed open to the idea. I said yes but not to push it, I would rather clients sought me out (which they did, and that generally works better for me!) than be pushed my way...

Then she said...

'.... and I'll get a 50% cut?'...

No.

Gimmied and stropped to come to an annual event with me one year - industry related for me and a chance to meet people I work with remotely, people interested in some of the stuff I do etc, some behind the scenes press/media stuff.

I usually do this on my own as up until covid, I could - and large crowds I found easier to negotiate by myself rather than constantly trying to keep tabs on someone else AND try not to get flattened by people not expecting to see a wheelchair (thus, not looking DOWN!)...

So she came along...

Got in the way. Interrupted my conversations with people to explain her presence to them (they really didn't care), explain she's not involved in the industry but is of course terribly knowledgeable (not) about it because shes my sister... talked over me, wasted their time and baffled some of them entirely.

She repeatedly told people it was astonishing that they'd want to talk to ME because im JUST WIDDLIN'DIDDLIN and it's baffling to her that anyone would find the thing I do interesting/fun/etc...

She also kept telling people that it was 'technically her day off' but she was my carer so she was still 'working'... (she wasn't she has never ever done care for me and I didn't need it then!) in a 'oh I am such a saint' kind of way. SO embarrassing!

Then as I was trying to review some footage for production team, she starts telling our cameraman how to do his job and commenting on the film we have (which needs to be broadcast in 10 minutes so really NO time for fucking about)... no one asked her, in fact I'd told her to go and get a coffee and chill for ten minutes... I genuinely thought he was going to yeet her out of the room!

Then on the way home... she asks me if I can submit a claim to Access to Work for her time that day - she was never hired for that day, and I only claimed AtW payments for driving/PA work for overnights, which she knew!

She doesn't come with me to such things any more and I have no further need for a PA who can't do care work now anyway so... fortunately those days are over!

Despite all this we do get on... just, in a strategically managed way and she has NOTHING to do with my work now in ANY way whatsoever!

SunnySundayMornings · 20/05/2022 05:46

Three years back I gave away a coffee machine on a Facebook group. A couple of months later I got a really nasty message off the lady who had the coffee machine telling me I should be ashamed of myself and that I am a vile 🙁shocked I messaged back to ask what her messages were all about and what had I done wrong. Basically after around 9 weeks of having the coffee machine it stopped working and she said her husband had to go to work without his coffee and she had around £35 worth of coffee pods and no machine and I should contribute towards a new one. I was flabbergasted. Since then I have never given anything away on Facebook.

EinsteinaGogo · 20/05/2022 12:40

Blimey, @SunnySundayMornings - that's proper CF territory 😳

Tessasanderson · 20/05/2022 14:35

I once advertised a bed for sale on facebook. It didnt sell so i had a change of heart and readvertised as free to someone who needed it. I was very specific that it was not to be resold.

Person turned up, told me it would be perfect for her little boy. I had dismantled it and numbered all the parts so it was easy to rebuild for someone.

2weeks later i notice it up for sale under a different name to the one who got it off me. I messaged but they denied all knowledge of getting it off me.

I know that person may have needed the money etc but it really made me think twice about giving things away to try to help.

Tessasanderson · 20/05/2022 14:36

Oh it was one of theose raised bed/desk/wardrobe things

AstroSurf · 20/05/2022 14:52

Tessasanderson · 20/05/2022 14:35

I once advertised a bed for sale on facebook. It didnt sell so i had a change of heart and readvertised as free to someone who needed it. I was very specific that it was not to be resold.

Person turned up, told me it would be perfect for her little boy. I had dismantled it and numbered all the parts so it was easy to rebuild for someone.

2weeks later i notice it up for sale under a different name to the one who got it off me. I messaged but they denied all knowledge of getting it off me.

I know that person may have needed the money etc but it really made me think twice about giving things away to try to help.

Annoying, but still, you couldn't manage to sell it, so let someone else try.

Funkyslippers · 20/05/2022 15:53

SunnySundayMornings I'd be pretty annoyed if it stopped working and I had loads of pods that I couldn't use but I'd be polite about it

emuloc · 20/05/2022 16:09

Tessasanderson · 20/05/2022 14:35

I once advertised a bed for sale on facebook. It didnt sell so i had a change of heart and readvertised as free to someone who needed it. I was very specific that it was not to be resold.

Person turned up, told me it would be perfect for her little boy. I had dismantled it and numbered all the parts so it was easy to rebuild for someone.

2weeks later i notice it up for sale under a different name to the one who got it off me. I messaged but they denied all knowledge of getting it off me.

I know that person may have needed the money etc but it really made me think twice about giving things away to try to help.

Once the bed is out of your possession, I would not have thought that you could stipulate what can be done with it.

Sloth66 · 20/05/2022 16:48

Helped a friend A - by putting her up at our house for up to 6 nights at a time while she was working nearby. This got to be fairly regular. Then one day whilst meeting another friend, she told me that A was coming down again next week. A hadn’t bothered to let me know, just assumed it was fine. A favour became an expectation.

Sleepyquest · 20/05/2022 16:50

Funkyslippers · 20/05/2022 15:53

SunnySundayMornings I'd be pretty annoyed if it stopped working and I had loads of pods that I couldn't use but I'd be polite about it

Are you joking?? It was free, the first owner didn't know it would break down in 9 weeks!

WhereTheLightningBugsBlaze · 20/05/2022 16:58

Funkyslippers · 20/05/2022 15:53

SunnySundayMornings I'd be pretty annoyed if it stopped working and I had loads of pods that I couldn't use but I'd be polite about it

You are a CF then?

Newestname002 · 20/05/2022 17:00

Sloth66 · 20/05/2022 16:48

Helped a friend A - by putting her up at our house for up to 6 nights at a time while she was working nearby. This got to be fairly regular. Then one day whilst meeting another friend, she told me that A was coming down again next week. A hadn’t bothered to let me know, just assumed it was fine. A favour became an expectation.

Did you tell friend A that, unfortunately, you didn't have the space free again for a while? Eg: family staying, etc... it's so annoying when your kindness to them is taken as their right. 🌹

Sloth66 · 20/05/2022 17:06

@Newestname002 yes I did. Enough was enough! She’s not happy, but it’s not my problem.

SunnySundayMornings · 20/05/2022 17:54

@Funkyslippers it was free. My DH brought it as a fad used it no more than 15 times. It was in perfect working order when she had it hence it being fine for the 9 weeks she had it. I genuinely couldn't believe she thought i should contribute to a new one she is definitely a CF.

Whooshaagh · 20/05/2022 18:02

SunnySundayMornings · 20/05/2022 17:54

@Funkyslippers it was free. My DH brought it as a fad used it no more than 15 times. It was in perfect working order when she had it hence it being fine for the 9 weeks she had it. I genuinely couldn't believe she thought i should contribute to a new one she is definitely a CF.

It probably just needed cleaning .
My dh has to run his coffee machine through with hot lemon water every few months.

Newestname002 · 20/05/2022 18:06

Sloth66 · 20/05/2022 17:06

@Newestname002 yes I did. Enough was enough! She’s not happy, but it’s not my problem.

Excellent!

knowinglesseveryday · 20/05/2022 18:10

In my first marriage my mother in law replaced her bedroom carpet the month after we married, and offered to sell us the (very) old one for £30. Which was a lot in 1990.

NickyNora · 20/05/2022 18:19

Friends of a friend...

They won a life changing amount of money. Bought 2 houses

Kept their council house.

LampLighter414 · 20/05/2022 18:35

Someone was selling item on Facebook and I bought it and asked them to drop off which they did. After they had gone I realised it wasn't very good value so asked them to come back 20 mins later for a refund and they said no. I was very poor at the time and it was a gift my DS and wasting the money on this was ruining his birthday but they didn't care. I gave them a peace of my mind so they blocked me. My partner sent some messages too and they blocked them as well.

Cheek of it!

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