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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Work woes - too sensitive?

4 replies

flourned · 19/05/2022 18:26

So I've been at my current company a year.
When I was there around 3 months, another lady joined in a different department but still within the office I'm in.. if that makes sense.

Anyway, she's completely shifted the entire dynamic. She's catty and very, VERY fake. She's sickly sweet, even uses this girly child like voice when talking to people - but behind their back she's vile about them. I say this with confidence because I've been the listening ear to her rants, not willingly but I've been in the room.

I've noticed the last few weeks that there's been a huge dynamic shift in the office. She's been trying to tell me how to do my job, when she doesn't even work in my sector. She has tag teamed with another member of her side of the business and they are both acting (in the only way I can describe it as...) very strange towards me. Short, snappy.. ignoring me when I ask a question (work related) it's really strange.

She has also spoken badly of the lady she's suddenly tag teaming up with.. so I don't doubt for a second that she speaks badly of me, to her.

When it comes to leaving time, they will both hang around doing 'odds and ends' in the office, and tell me to 'leave, go home now' when I'm packing away. So they are left alone in the office. It may well be me overthinking, but I always feel like I'm being spoken about as soon as I leave the room.

If one of the women aren't at work, they will happily talk to me like nothings happened and are friendly and approachable, so I don't know what's changed.

I'm going away soon and one of these ladies is going to have to cover my work. Last time I came back from time away, the first hour I got back into the office; she collared me and was very passive aggressive with me telling me of several points within my job that I don't do correctly. I have been doing my job the exact way I've been taught. She has had very little, but some experience in my roll, but I don't appreciate her being so patronising in front of a full office.

I just feel like the whole dynamic has changed recently and I don't know what to do. I don't ever ever stand up for myself. But I'm coming home feeling upset and anxious, wondering what's been said about me. And it's really effecting my life outside of work. My relationship with DP is rocky as he has said he can't take any more of me coming hone withdrawn and upset.

I just don't know what to do. I just needed somewhere to vent.

OP posts:
flourned · 19/05/2022 18:35

Forgot to add, this woman has also told management that she's concerned about me when there's nothing wrong, I've not said or done anything to make her feel that way.

She's also told my manager before that she thinks I'm leaving, when I've never ever expressed that! It's just very strange. She's very very involved in my role for some stupid reason when she doesn't need to be.

OP posts:
theemmadilemma · 19/05/2022 18:35

Where is your Manager in this? Have they noticed anything?

flourned · 19/05/2022 18:41

Manager is off this week, she isn't a great manager to be honest and is more like a friend to everyone. She doesn't really have any authority. The woman being horrible was a manager in her previous role and even talks badly of our manager now. I think she's used to being too dog?

OP posts:
flourned · 19/05/2022 18:54

Top dog* BlushGrin

OP posts:
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