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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think teachers should not come to work when sick?

73 replies

Yorkie88 · 19/05/2022 13:34

My DH is a teacher in a large secondary school.

DH and both DC have got a horrible tummy bug. Vomiting. Bad nappies (DC, not DH. 😝)

I am actually fine and haven't caught it somehow but obviously have 2 DC with me at home while I'm trying to work which has been really difficult and my boss is getting v. pissed off

The thing is - DH has gone to work all week. He was literally being sick at 5am and in the car at 7am driving to work.

Firstly - he's left me in the shit. Quite literally. Secondly - isn't it immoral to go teach a bunch of kids when you know you have a contagious tummy bug?

BUT - he tells me that it's so so frowned upon to be ill when you're a teacher, and that it's just 'not acceptable like it is in other jobs' and I don't under teaching. It's a new job and I get that it isn't great to be sick in a new job early on, but also - if you are actually sick - stay away. It's immoral. But he insists he would go down awfully if he called in sick all week and that he has to plough on.

?

OP posts:
PAFMO · 19/05/2022 16:54

Gymnopedie · 19/05/2022 13:44

BUT - he tells me that it's so so frowned upon to be ill when you're a teacher, and that it's just 'not acceptable like it is in other jobs' and I don't under teaching. It's a new job and I get that it isn't great to be sick in a new job early on, but also - if you are actually sick - stay away. It's immoral. But he insists he would go down awfully if he called in sick all week and that he has to plough on.

Sadly, in the majority of schools, he's not wrong. Teachers are damned if they do and damned if they don't.

As can be seen from some of the comments.
I had a vomiting migraine yesterday and took my first day off this academic year, and with 114 kids sitting exams next week felt wretched all day with guilt.

howtomoveforwards · 19/05/2022 17:11

It’s how it is.
a) phone in by 7am so the school can get cover. Often at 7am you might not be feeling great but with a cup of coffee and a quiet few minutes, you might rally, yu might not. Teachers usually decide they’ll rally and if they don’t, it’s too late to do anything about it.
b) set cover which can take a while, depending on your HOD, year group colleagues etc. I wouldn’t set cover because I know my HOD would sort it and that the teacher I teach parallel classes with would know where we were up to but if you are feeling shite, it is literally easier to go in than diet cover,
c) having to make up lessons with exam classes. Every lesson counts.

d) school budgets have been cut so far that buying in cover is problematic. Which means your colleagues will have to cover which you really don’t want to happen because you’re all under enough strain as it is.
f)we get 13 weeks holiday a year which we are acutely aware of. We try to limit time off on this basis alone.

noblegiraffe · 19/05/2022 17:16

Actual vomiting is something I'd stay at home for, mainly for the risk of vomiting in class.

Otherwise, it's normally easier to go in than set cover by 8am when ill.

frenchie4002 · 19/05/2022 17:56

Most schools are shitty with sickness and like pps have said sometimes it’s just as much hassle to be off. Having said that, there’s not much they can do if he’s genuinely sick. Much better he takes a couple days off to recover.

BananaShrimp · 19/05/2022 18:06

He’s right. He’ll get in less trouble for infecting pupils than he would for staying off. Also this probably doesn’t apply in your DH’s case, but lots of employers have started classing teachers as self employed which means they don’t get paid if they stay off sick.

PumpkinPie2016 · 19/05/2022 18:12

Unfortunately, as teachers, we do tend to go in when ill 🤒 because it's actually hard work being off. I am a head of department and if I am out of school e.g. at a meeting I still get emails/messages from me team that need dealing with. Same if I am ill.

Then there's the setting of cover - it takes time and effort and depending on the group it's hard to find something suitable. For example I have a lovely Y7 group of pupils who all have SEND so I'd feel awful being off because I know they would struggle.

Feeling enormously guilty because you know getting cover staff is a nightmare.

Playing catch up when you get back.

It really is just easier to go to work.

Floorandflooringme · 19/05/2022 18:12

Has he thought about the immunocompromised children and adults he'll come into contact with?
My dc could end up in hospital if he caught a sickness bug. We have to accept the risk of leaving the house and hope others are sensible and stay at home when ill and school is a daily risk without selfish behaviour.
What if the students who are taking their exams catch it, or some one takes it home to their vulnerable relative? It could cause disruption to multiple families. He also hasn't thought about the effect on you and your job either. Quite selfish behaviour on all fronts.

Cliftontherocks · 19/05/2022 18:25

RealBecca · 19/05/2022 13:40

Could it be that he doesnt fancy staying home and looking after dc and work is a good excuse

This

Watapalava · 19/05/2022 18:30

to be fair the fact he goes in and manages suggest he’s not that ill

2manycats · 19/05/2022 18:33

He’s right. You’d be better shitting on your headteacher’s desk than phoning in sick in most schools.

Trying2310 · 19/05/2022 18:40

He is right to an extent. Teachers are encouraged to come into work feeling all types of ill. The guilt trip we get from senior leaders about phoning in sick and the labourious task of setting detailed cover means a lot of the time it is easier to go in despite feeling like shit.

However, to go in with a sickness bug is not right. Taking aside the risk of having to leave a class to vomit or get to the toilet fills me with horror, he is risking giving this to vulnerable students and those sitting external exams. Not cool at all!

wishitwasaduvetday · 19/05/2022 18:45

RealBecca · 19/05/2022 13:40

Could it be that he doesnt fancy staying home and looking after dc and work is a good excuse

Haha! So you think he'd rather go to work and deal with loads of kids, try and teach them, deal with their behaviour, all while feeling ill just to avoid dealing with his own 2 kids and potentially having to clear up a bit of their sick?! Clearly said by someone who has no idea of teaching. It's not an office job where he can hide all day with his head in the desk.

LilacPoppy · 19/05/2022 18:45

Your dh is incredibly selfish. There are zero excuses. How dare he put his thoughts of career progression about others health.

MolkosTeenageAngst · 19/05/2022 18:48

I’m a teacher. I would go into work with a cold/ cough/ sore throat etc , my general rule is that if I feel well enough to work all day I will go in. But a stomach bug is probably one of the few exceptions where I think even if you feel ok you don’t go in as it’s so contagious; I’d also worry about being sick or having diarrhoea in the middle of a lesson!

Watapalava · 19/05/2022 18:58

His big can’t be that bad tho if he can manage actually being in work without shutting himself in class! No one that I’ll would last a day teaching

Watapalava · 19/05/2022 18:58

Bug
shitting
ill

moomintrolls · 19/05/2022 19:04

It's true, you can't just call in sick when you're a teacher, not like you can when you just work in an office.

Also, we vaccinate for rotavirus, and tummy bugs are a normal part of life. And contact with them is how we develop immunity. I don't think it's immoral but immorality is not absolute and is based on opinion so that's for you to decide on.

LilacPoppy · 19/05/2022 19:18

@moomintrolls nope if you are sick you don’t go to work teacher or not. It’s simply not true.

Beautifulmonster87 · 19/05/2022 19:19

Yeah he’s an idiot.

Wavygravy1 · 19/05/2022 19:21

I work in a school as a TA and had 3 days off recently due to an awful sickness bug. I don’t know how he’s gone to work with one?!

WGACA · 19/05/2022 19:22

Your husband is right. I’ve been sick all night and then dragged myself to work and I haven’t had a day off sick in nearly 20 years. It’s so much easier to go as colleagues are so impacted by you not being there e.g playground duty, clubs, meetings…

MmeMeursault · 19/05/2022 19:27

I was pretty ill last week (not D&V, contagious or similar, but enough to warrant staying at home usually) and had to choose between staying at home feeling sorry for myself or going in and conducting A-Level MFL speaking exams.

Had I not gone in, those kids wouldn't have had their speaking exam as there's absolutely no one else who could have done it for me.

Trust me, however horrendous I was feeling, it was better that I went in and those kids did their exam on that day.

Would PPs really have preferred that I missed their kids A-Level exam?

Underroad · 19/05/2022 19:27

That is not ok! I used to be a teacher and although there is a ‘soldier on’ mentality, the one exception to that in every school I worked at was D&V bugs. Every school I worked for had the 48 hour rule for teachers as well as pupils and the other staff would be furious if someone came in with a vomiting bug.

NoNameIdeas · 19/05/2022 19:28

Another teacher here, can honestly say I've never (and never would!) go in with a sickness bug, there's absolutely no need whatsoever, and so unfair on anyone it's passed on to.
I have, however, gone in and taught with no voice which was fun.
I'd be so cross if a colleague came into work knowing they had been ill

moomintrolls · 19/05/2022 19:32

LilacPoppy · 19/05/2022 19:18

@moomintrolls nope if you are sick you don’t go to work teacher or not. It’s simply not true.

Ridiculous and not how the world works.

Say you have a cold every few months, which people do, that's not a chronic illness but it would put you off work for days every few months.

You were always told to power through during my 20 years in the workplace.