AIBU to cancel a date

[LonelyInAutumn]

On a previous thread I talked about how hard I find it to date, especially online dating/dating apps. A few people said it would be better to meet someone organically e.g out and about shopping. Well the other day, I was approached by a guy, we spoke for a bit and exchanged numbers and asked if I wanted to go on a date. I said yes but I let him know that I'm not sure what I want. I've been single for a year and I'm still very guarded and cautious. He told me that he wants something serious which has made me feel very anxious and overwhelmed. I thought I wanted to start dating but this sudden feeling of being overwhelmed has me confused, maybe I'm not actually ready? He's texted me this afternoon asking if we're still ok for the date (next week) and I haven't replied because I'm honestly not sure I want to go. WIBU to cancel it before even giving him a chance? I think I shouldn't have gave him my number in the first place or agreed to the date, but at the time I didn't feel this way 😰

YNBU as long as you tell him and dont string him along.....however I do feel that YABU to yourself for not giving yourself that chance. Have you considered speaking to someone regarding your anxiety around dating. I wouldnt worry too much about what he has said I think he is just trying to put across that he isnt interested in 'playing the field' that's all. Maybe try going for a coffee as friends first rather than a date if he is interested.

Good luck

YABu

you we’re clear you weren’t sure, he accepted this and still wants to go on a date. Self sabotage all you want but you’d definitely be unreasonable and most likely shooting yourself in the foot

As hard as it sounds, try not to overthink it. Give it a go - Make it a short date, like a coffee with a clear end point (have to leave by 3pm because you have an appointment or something), and the worst outcome is a boring hour. I get that it’s nerve wracking but it will always feel this scary at the beginning, and if you can push through it, it will be easier in future. Go in with low expectations, and if it goes well then great, and if not then nothing has changed and you can try again with someone else.

Thanks for your help all :)

He may have said 'something serious' to let you know he's not just after sex.