To not go out for dinner with these people

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I've been invited for a meal tomorrow with my partner's family - there are five of them going altogether.

The problem I have is that out of five, only one of them has any table manners. Think loud chewing, slurping, talking loudly with mouth full - the last time I had to make a fort around my plate with menus and a potted plant to catch the particles flying in my direction.

This would be unpleasant enough for anyone but I have extreme anxiety, misophonia and ocd - I'm particularly funny about food (people touching it, breathing on it etc). Another consideration is that our relationship isn't great and we're in talks about possibly separating if we can't make things work, so I'm not sure there will be any benefit from putting myself in this situation again.

AIBU?

People have a duty to not be disgusting while others are trying to eat. And if they can't manage that they shouldn't be allowed out 😤

Don't go, life is too short to purposefully put yourself in uncomfortable positions.

We had some friends around for lunch a while back, and the extremely beautiful elegant “lady” slurped, slopped, spilt, chewed lowly, spat, left food all over the table. It was unfuckingbelievable! My husband and I couldn’t make eye contact as we would have completely lost it. I thought she was joking at first! 🤢

Oh god... That would have given me the rage. I just don't get it. In my partner's case they were never taught it (hence his mum being the worst) however you'd think that an adult, having been around other adults socially for a long time now, would have figured out that they eat like a farm animal and should probably stop 🤬

Yes. Stay at home. Everyone will be happier.

There's a lot of this goes on my in my H's family so I can absolutely sympathise - my cat has better eating habits than most of my in-laws!

H blames boarding school for not teaching table manners - however having seen how his Mother eats it's come 100% from her, absolutely disgusting.

My own Mum eats like a 'normal' person and she looks so prim and proper next to MIL at the dinner table, it's hilarious to see them side by side - I'm sure my Mum is disgusted too but she's never said a word.

My cat likes to take her food out of her dish and eat it off the floor. Yep, still better manners 😆

Boarding school! You'd think if you're paying all that money they'd come out with basic manners. Maybe it's hereditary 😌

You sound quite judgemental. No-ones perfect.

Some people are just totally oblivious aren’t they.

my mum had my nephew around for lunch last weekend. She taught him how to use a knife as he has only ever used a folk and hands. He is 8!!!!

this thread reminded me of a work lunch out. My very lovely colleague who I adore left me very shocked with her table manners.

Knife and fork in wrong hands. holding knife and fork like they were say a hairbrush for example. Pulling food apart on the plate instead of using the knife. Big huge amounts of food shovelled up, mouth as wide open as possible. Food in very full mouth and trying to fit even more in. Chewing with open mouth and chomping very loudly. Doing all the above like it was a race.

it was so strange as she is so lovely and timid. I was so shocked

You must be feeling a migraine coming on.

🤣 are you the partner

It's quite sad in a way that obviously some parents don't care to teach their children these life skills. It's completely antisocial.

Shit, rumbled!

DHL’s dad and one of his brothers can be a bit like this, but they otherwise are lovely people, I just make sure I sit away from them at mealtimes and due to covid it’s not been a problem for a while

No way I’d go if I were you