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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To consider female sterilisation..

76 replies

SuziSecondLaw · 13/05/2022 21:00

Posting here for traffic really!

I'm so sick of birth control. Tried everything other than coils (I'm way too much of an anxious person to cope with always knowing there was this plastic thing inside me!). Currently on the mini pill, but have 4-5 week periods followed by a couple of weeks off. Been on it 15 months now. It's also killed my sex drive.

Any experiences with sterilisation/tubes tied?

OP posts:
Andariego · 14/05/2022 15:50

I was contemplating having this done at some point after I give birth and had no idea that it was so difficult to have done on the NHS. I had a coil before and it gave me the most horrific pelvic infection and hormonal contraception does not agree with me at all.

I just googled the CCG funding in my area and like OP, it’s not even listed, only the reversal (which it states isn’t offered) so I’m guessing it’s not funded at all here. Disgraceful.

Bumtum126 · 14/05/2022 15:56

I'm guessing it's not as widely available as the snip because of the wider range of contraception available to women v men .

poshme · 14/05/2022 15:59

I wouldn't ever risk it. I know someone who was sterilised (risk to life if got pregnant again) and they were pregnant 6 months later. Had to have surgical abortion (as didn't realise pregnant till relatively late) and then had hysterectomy.

GrapesAreMyJam · 14/05/2022 16:09

This reply has been deleted

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

Nat6999 · 16/05/2022 00:01

It isn't major abdominal surgery, it is done keyhole. I had an ovarian cyst, one ovary & both my tubes removed which is similar surgery, I went in for 6.00pm & was home by 10.00pm all done

Blimeyherewegoagain · 16/05/2022 00:16

I had it done when I was in for another procedure years ago. I was very definite about going ahead. The male surgeon tried to talk me out of it “in case I got divorced “ but I knew I wasn’t going to have more children.
It makes me cross that we aren’t allowed to have control over our own bodies in this way. Why does someone else who doesn’t even know me that well try to persuade me to change my mind? I stood my ground and luckily they went ahead.
I did get ovulation pain for a few months after and then it settled.

Notaneffingcockerspaniel · 16/05/2022 00:48

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn at the poster's request.

AcrossthePond55 · 16/05/2022 01:47

Had my tubes clipped when I was 39. DS2 was 5 and in Kindergarten. We had a pregnancy scare I realized afterwards that I absolutely didn't want to 'start over' with a baby.

It was easy peasy. Called the doctor and he set it all up as 'day surgery', I was in at 7 and home by 1. They used 'light' anesthesia so I knew nothing. No pain and easy recuperation.

I'm in the US and insurance paid for it. No questions and no 'qualifications'.

It is considered permanent, although I know they can be reversed. Insurance doesn't pay for that, though.

Vikinga · 16/05/2022 02:02

Use condoms or why doesn't your DH get the snip?

ThinWomansBrain · 16/05/2022 02:27

It's (local NHS Guidelines) not on there for some reason, they have female and male sterilisation reversal listed as not funded, but not the actual procedure

won't be area specific, but have you tried looking for nice guidelines on the subject? they can be helpful in pushing for what you feel you need.

Aquamarine1029 · 16/05/2022 02:35

I was sterilised at 27, privately, a year after my second was born. One of the best things I've ever done. I'm 49 now and have never once regretted it. My doctor told me that tubal ligation should never be done at the same time as childbirth, as that's what overwhelmingly causes the instances of failure.

bozna · 16/05/2022 02:38

Sayana press inject yourself every 13 weeks and haven't had a period in a year. Had other injections and implant and for years had 2 periods a month.

Pyewhacket · 16/05/2022 02:48

I had it done when I was 28 after my third unplanned pregnancy but I had to have it done privately ( I elected to have my tubes completely removed - salpingectomy ).

It was all very straight forward and I was in and out the same day. Never had a problem since.

Reallyreallyborednow · 16/05/2022 03:43

Not necessarily. Mine was a minor op, more like keyhole surgery these days, and I was out the same day, with a few days at home for recovery.

it’s not the procedure itself, it’s the risks.

every time you go into the abdominal cavity, even for something very simple, the risks of complications are high. Infection, bowel perforation, bleeding, etc etc. things that can be very serious, even life threatening.

compared to a vasectomy which is pretty much superficial it is very high risk for complications.

this is why they will do it if they’re already in there for a section or whatever. But the benefits must outweigh the risk, and for abdominal surgery in most cases it won’t. Mainly because there are other long term options for women, whereas men vasectomy is the only long term option.

Jadefrances · 20/04/2023 21:05

Hii 👋

Did you get anywhere with your sterilisation??
I am 30 I have been for the consultation and the pre op so I am now just waiting on a date..
I have 2 kids, youngest has brittle bone disease hence the need to get sterilised to avoid having another child with the same condition ect.
I prepared myself to have a week off of work and then a week of light duties. I'm a senior housekeeper in a care home so can be lots of heavy lifting ect. However when telling my boss she told me that she had an employee in her old home who had it done and was then off for 4 weeks 😮. This has scared me massively as with cost of living crisis I don't think anyone can afford 4 weeks off of work.. Just curious to know people's recovery time please. 🙏
Thanks
Jade

SterilisationQ · 20/04/2023 21:36

Hi @Jadefrances I was sterilised (tubal ligation) around a month ago. I was unable to work or walk around much for the first couple of days, and slept a lot. The pain was like moderate period cramps, and ibuprofen kept it under control - they gave me codeine but I didn't take it. I could shower on the second day (carefully!). By about day 4 I was feeling much better, and by the second week I could work, although I have an office job. The stitches dissolved and the ends came out by the end of the second week. I'm at 4 weeks post-op now and would say I've been pretty much normal for the last couple of weeks apart from being a bit more tired than usual, which has cleared up in the last couple of days.

Bitconfusedhmm · 20/04/2023 23:46

@Jadefrances can your partner not have a vasectomy?

Yellowcakestand · 21/04/2023 00:13

I had mine done last year. Took over a week for the bloating to go. I was in a lot of pain the first few days, but I'm so glad I had it done.

QueenBitch666 · 21/04/2023 00:42

I was sterilised at 30 whilst single and childfree on the NHS
Best thing I ever did. Go for it

ISpyCobraKai · 21/04/2023 00:45

I was sterilised age 30, single with a 5yr old.
Absolutely never regretted it and I'm 45 now.

Anotherparkingthread · 21/04/2023 02:45

Sterilised at 25 on the nhs with no children. 35 now and very happy with the decision.

Jadefrances · 21/04/2023 05:49

He's refusing to get it done.. He had a consultation with a gp over the phone and ever since then I've had no luck with convincing him. If he had the same gp as me then I'm not surprised to be honest she was vile and actually asked for me to bring my husband along to one appointment because clearly women in the UK still cannot make a decision without the husbands in the room. 🙄Xx

Jadefrances · 21/04/2023 05:50

@Bitconfusedhmm He's refusing to get it done.. He had a consultation with a gp over the phone and ever since then I've had no luck with convincing him. If he had the same gp as me then I'm not surprised to be honest she was vile and actually asked for me to bring my husband along to one appointment because clearly women in the UK still cannot make a decision without the husbands in the room. 🙄Xx

Jadefrances · 21/04/2023 05:53

Thanks all this is making me feel more relaxed about it again now, I know I'm making the right decision for myself and my family. 😊

Mummadeze · 21/04/2023 05:56

I tried to get it done but on the day, the surgeon talked me into having the coil inserted under general anaesthetic instead. It worked great for me. I had it in for 5 years and it never bothered me in the slightest.