Bit of a background - I’m 26 and have been off work for 10 weeks now after being in and out of hospital and finally diagnosed with a serious autoimmune disease that has left me weak and in a lot of pain but above all - attacked my eyes and I now permanently wear an eyepatch / struggle to do anything. I’m not looking for any sympathy etc but I have naturally become very depressed about this as ten weeks is a long time to sit in a dark room on your own and dwell on things, very lonely, bored, ‘why me?’ , and generally just having a shit time. I live with my partner who is also my best friend and he is brilliant and cares about me very much, he really is a gentleman. However, over the last couple of weeks I have told him how I wish he would do something for me to look forward to , or set up a little movie night or say ‘if I can’t take you out for dinner then we will pretend and have one here’ or a spa night or plan just something to break up my week as every day is the same and I dread the next. He hasn’t seemed to listen and is quite happy to just let me sit and watch Netflix all day as though The lack of quality of life is ok despite me being very open about how depressed I get recently.
ANYWAY, yesterday I had a particularly bad day with the pain and the mental side of it. He had to work in the day , he came home and was here for an hour and then went to football. Then he came home from football and went out to the cinema. And I was just sat like a part of the furniture waiting for him to come home. I know he is still entitled to his social life of course and I would never interrupt that. when he got home last night he told me ‘I’m off tomorrow and not going anywhere so will be with you all day baby!’ …
so I was sooooo excited about today and I got up and struggled to make us bacon bagels for breakfast as a treat and I was sat watching Netflix and he came in and sat beside me for about 20 mins whilst he ate his bagel and then turned around (to his desk) and put his Xbox on and has sat on it since.
I give it 15 mins or so and said to him ‘I thought we were going to spend the day together today?’ His response was ‘yeah we are I’m not a million miles away am I’ ..
I have stormed into bedroom and been in here upset since. He’s not been in.
AIBU to be really upset by this? maybe I am over sensitive atm but I really needed some cheering up and I’m just not getting it and I know if the shoe was on the other foot I would be going above and beyond every single day to keep his spirits up and make his life fun again..
at the same time I want him to WANT to cheer me up and shouldn’t have to beg.
I guess I just want to know I’m not thinking irrationally and you would feel the same too?