PMS ruining my life?

[Flois]

I had a baby last year - baby almost a year old.

I thought I had PND but I was fluctuating so much between feeling fine and feeling horrendous that I wasn't sure.

Now I've seen a pattern - it's my period. This is my monthly cycle now.

Days 1-7 heavy bleeding but manageable with usual period pain. Generally feel OK emotionally

Days 7-14 feel great, full of energy, balanced, love spending time with my baby, get loads done, am a great Mum

Days 14-21 mood starts to fluctuate. Start becoming tired, irritable, lose patience, constant negative voice in my head, think about divorcing my husband because he didn't put the bins out etc

Days 21-28 headaches, hot flashes, ridiculous bloating, constant hunger, tiredness I can't shift, dizziness. Putting huge amounts of mental energy into balan

Thank you so much for everyone sharing their experiences. It's really helped at least in terms of me being more sure that I don't have PND.

I've done a bit more reading on PMDD and I can identify. I think because I can 'bottle' it, I never labelled myself as 'severe', it didn't seem to apply to me but actually I just think I'm very good at 'acting'. PMDD applies to the way I feel inside not the way I present externally - but the feelings feel like an absolute reality and are so all consuming and awful.

I'm a day out from my period now and I feel no positive, loving emotions towards my baby or DH at all. They seem like strangers to me that I could quite honestly walk away from. I feel empty. Outwardly though, you wouldn't really know. I shut down and perform the duty of a mother. My DH will say frequently- you don't seem yourself, you OK? To which I can placate with 'yeah just tired'. I don't pick fights, I just silently seethe while equally feeling like a monster.

It will be interesting to see how I feel in a couple of days. But given previous months that rush of warmth hits like a truck and feels blissful. I look at my baby and can't imagine how I could possibly have felt anything other than an all consuming love.

You've all helped me understand that this is actually quite serious and I shouldn't be spending half my life feeling like a monster.

I'm just not sure what I do. I'd go back on the pill in a heartbeat but I had pre-eclampsia in pregnancy, aura migraines and I'm over 40yrs so I guess thats why the doctor said they weren't right for me (I used the lowdown website and equally got a you shouldn't take them result). HRT might be an avenue to explore, likewise the sertraline.

Have a docs appointment booked in a week to discuss!

Thanks again though, you've all massively helped xx

Good luck op, I hope the appointment goes well x

Think about the Mirena, OP. I had it put in 6 months ago and it's been life changing. I would range between raging and suicidal and you could mark those days in advance on a calendar. A small minority suffer various side effects with the Miren but most, like me, do not. Much smaller dose of hormones so older women can have it too. Just get it done with a GP who does this a lot or privately for a better experience- it's quite painful so you need someone 1) empathetic and 2) competent.

Its sounds like it is linked to the hormone change that occurs after ovulation.
Does it resolve as you come on yr period straight away ?
.i had a condition called period dysporia .. it was like severe pms post ovulation( it did not happen during preg.. in fact it went away)
It made my life hell and no matter what i did myself at home did anything to.help.please see your gp .. if it is that it needs management and you wont have to put up with this!

I started suffering with insane pms also after turning 40. Apparently our hormones are up and down in our 40s, perimenopause and all that. Like you Im still regular, but a week to 10 says (sometimes 2 weeks ) before period I'd get anxiety, terrible mood swings, rage, my boobs super painful with stabby pain, just feeling so awful and not myself.
I tried all sorts vitamins etc. Then I did a blood test to see if I have any deficiencies and to check my hormones.
Turned out i had high estrogen.
Looked into symptoms of estrogen dominance , i ticked every single one of them.
Started researching things to balance that out , found a supplement called DIM.
Now, I normally don't rave about anything, but this thing changed my life. I've been taking it probably 7-8 months now, in combination with evening primrose oil, and magnesium which are all good for this kinda stuff.
My symptoms have either gone or seriously minimised. I don't even notice getting my period now. My boobs feel fine, I don't have anxiety my mood is more stable . I feel so much better and wouldn't go without it now.
I order mine from Focus Supplements online, take one a day. Look it up it's basically made from broccoli, cauliflower and that sorta vegetables- totally safe. It's good for other stuff too apparently ,lots of health benefits.
It's seriously given me my life back.
I also sleep so much better since I started it ,like proper deep good sleep. And my libido has perked up which is a bonus !
Try it 😃

Hi @Flois how are you doing ? Just to let you know I saw my GP and she suggested an anti depressant for the 2 weeks before period starts she said it's worked for many of her patients and it's all so common! I've never had anti depressants before but I think I need to try it?