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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to be annoyed at my colleagues?

14 replies

user6251662 · 06/05/2022 20:15

I have a chronic illness that resulted in me having 6 months off work at the end of 2020. Since then I have tried my best not to let it affect my work, I haven't had any time off ill since and always have my hospital appointments on my days off.
The only way it has affected my work is I now work less hours and I don't work any overtime. I never speak about my illness at work and only two of my colleagues know about it.
We had a new manager start this week and these two colleagues took it upon themselves to fill her ill on my illness, explaining my illness and that I don't work overtime. I feel so upset its my illness and it should be up to me to tell a new manager about it.
AIBU?

OP posts:
Illstartexercisingtomorrow · 06/05/2022 20:18

Did they do it out of spite or to be helpful so new manager doesn’t overload you?

Gliblet · 06/05/2022 20:20

YANBU, it was not their information to share and they should have more respect for your confidentiality. Have you asked them what they were thinking?

LoudingVoice · 06/05/2022 20:21

It depends why and how they did it?

If they said, don’t put @user6251662 down for overtime because she’s been I’ll so doesn’t do extra hours out of kindness to save you having to explain they did it from the right place?

Yarboosucks · 06/05/2022 20:21

Did they explain fairly and sympathetically or complaining about the injustice?
If the first, YABU
If the second, YANBU

TibetanTerrah · 06/05/2022 20:22

Doesnt matter why they did it, the manager should have been filled in by HR when they started the role surely?

Cakecakecheese · 06/05/2022 20:23

They could have meant well, it could have been them trying to help, but it really isn't their place to do that.

Iamnotamermaid · 06/05/2022 20:26

New manager should have also been aware that getting medical information about an individual from a third party is not exactly the way to go.

Georgeskitchen · 06/05/2022 20:28

YANBU They have no business telling anyone your private business

ButtockUp · 06/05/2022 20:29

They might have been pre-empting a comment about your shorter hours/ no overtime.
They probably felt that they were looking out for you.
If you complain, you'll have to accept the resulting frostiness from your colleagues.

Isitcake · 06/05/2022 20:30

Depends, if they were doing it to try to protect you or if they were gossiping.

Obviously it is your info to share but they know most people dont know so maybe they wanted to tell new boss in case you didn't.

BaaMoon · 06/05/2022 20:32

HR should have filled them in. Or yourself when you met them.

user6251662 · 06/05/2022 21:45

ButtockUp · 06/05/2022 20:29

They might have been pre-empting a comment about your shorter hours/ no overtime.
They probably felt that they were looking out for you.
If you complain, you'll have to accept the resulting frostiness from your colleagues.

@ButtockUp I won't be complaining its not worth the hassle.

OP posts:
FairyCakeWings · 06/05/2022 21:49

YANBU, but they probably did it with good intentions.

user6251662 · 06/05/2022 21:49

Isitcake · 06/05/2022 20:30

Depends, if they were doing it to try to protect you or if they were gossiping.

Obviously it is your info to share but they know most people dont know so maybe they wanted to tell new boss in case you didn't.

@Isitcake I'm not sure the reason they did it. I just feel annoyed because they are not up to date with my condition so don't see how they can share my medical info with her.
I would have spoken to her about it but didn't see the need in her first week in the business.

OP posts:
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