About kids harassing my dog

[Madmaxxy]

I see so many posts on here about people being pissed off about dogs running up to their kids (Understandable) so here's a reverse, if you will.

I was standing in the queue outside a cafe with my dog (terrier mix about the size of a border terrier, for context, and a very dog friendly area, type of place they have a jar of treats at the till)

Mum and two kids approx aged 6/8 join the queue behind me. Mum is absolutely engrossed with something on her phone. The kids are obviously interested in my dog and the younger one starts flapping a leaflet in his face. I say quite clearly 'please don't do that, he's a bit nervous'

Mum obviously hears me, glances up from her phone and continues to ignore her kids. The kids then start really crowding him and chanting 'hot dog, hot dog, hot dog' a few inches from his face. He's now cowering behind my legs, and the younger one poked him on the back. Again I asked the child to not do that, and absolutely no acknowledgment from the mother. Luckily our turn to go in so we got away from them after that.

AIBU to think that after the first time I had to ask them to stop the mother should have reinforced the message and pulled them away... And after the second time it would have been a good time to teach the kids about dog safety, not to pet other peoples dogs without asking first etc. And certainly not to poke a dog in the back when it's not looking!!! My dog wouldn't have bitten them or anything but he was quite clearly bothered by it, and one day they might just pick the wrong dog to harass, and we all know who's fault it would be if anything happened.

AIBU to think it goes both ways and that kids need to be taught how to behave safely around dogs. And to think regardless, if kids are bothering a stranger the mother should have said something to them.

This happens a bit too often for comfort.

I have a 3 and a bit year old Bull Terrier. He is soft as anything but is also easily overexcited. So much as he loves attention he will start to bounce, twirl and grab at sleeves very quickly. So I do what any responsible owner does, I explain all of that to anyone who asks if they can pet him.

But so many times I have had toddlers pushed in his direction, to cuddle the "bunny dog". I mean they aren't called the bloody Land Shark for nothing, they do look all teeth when they have their ears back, smiling (which is very often!). How stupid can some people get?

Obvioulsy just commenting for yet another shamless plug of the breed
This is him in grubby Land Shark mode

I agree with you. There needs to be a reasonable amount of responsibility for the parents and children when it comes to dogs in public.

I had a little girl (3 or 4 years old) once grabbed and throw herself onto my dog from behind. Parents thought it was funny because it looked like she wanted to ride on the dog ...
Luckily my dog was on the lead and used to small children ... she actually loves them a bit to much!
But imagine the outrage if my dog had defened itself?
I often ask people who don't understand dogs questions like "how do you react if a stranger pats your head or pulls your hair when walking by?" As this is the most annoying and common thing kids seem to do to my dogs. (Mine have long soft flowing hair, very tactile and tempting! They are sadly used to this type of treatment from strangers. The averagehumanwouldn'tput up with this.)

Im not keen on EBT (it’s the head), but she is a cutie

1. the adult with the children clearly doesn't know boundaries and how to educate the children around other people's dogs and clearly couldn't give a shit about what the children get up to but would soon scream bloody murder if your dog had turned and bitten/snarled/growled at them; 2) the children aren't educated/disciplined appropriately and are allowed to get away with their bad/poor behaviour. Poor doggie.

My small, very cute dog doesn't like children and is scared of them. Its not them being small human beings, it's their unpredictability, running, being loud.

I'm actually surprised how good most kids are. They look, I can see they find my dog very cute but do nothing.

Occasionally kids will want to approach and yes, most will ask. The problem is that they expect a 'yes it's ok' so don't even wait or listen to the answer and go to touch them. My dog recoil and we have to move away whilst I say, my dog doesn't like children, sorry. Some are more insistent than others, but in the majority, I find kids well behaved (as are dogs) where I live.

Of course she's a shit parent. I expect it isn't a regular thing for children to harass your dog and parents do nothing, so more Chat than AIBU.
I once told a child throwing stones that the dog doesn't bite, but I do. He ran away.

I would have bloody well told them off!

Oh they are very much a marmite dog.

I just wish more people were more careful of him, for him, and didn't just assume he would be up for some rough housing - I say people, I mean men, obviously!

Come and ruffle his ears, Put you hand in his mouth. Give him a push, a bit of roughhousing, expect him to love it and play. SOD OFF!

(And he is a he, very much intact!!)

A little girl came bounding up to my JRT once and she was startled and barked. The girl was scared. I apologised to her dad and he replied, firmly “No problem, she has to learn”.

The mum’s a shot parent and you’re not much better as a dog owner if you’re allowing these brats to torment your dog to the extent that your poor thing is cowering. You should have told her in no uncertain terms to parent her bloody children!

Of course I agree that children should be taught to leave strange dogs alone, though all mine have been happy to receive a friendly pat or cuddle from a child the introductions need to be done. We had an elderly but quite ferocious looking Staffie a few years back, the kindest dog you could meet and some people crossed the road when they saw us coming. It really made my day when a small child toddled over to him and kissed him, he deserved that. o;f course with hindsight it might not have been my lovely old chap she approached.....

This annoys me so much! I have a miniature dachshund and the attention is almost constant. People (not just children!) run after us in the street shouting “sausage!” To be fair, most kids are really lovely and well behaved and my MD absolutely loves children so there’s no problem with them having a little stroke but there’s a significant minority who don’t ask and some who can be actively really rude. One day I was running late for school pick up and a boy and his grandmother appeared in front of us blocking the pavement, I said “excuse me” and tried to quickly walk around them and the grandmother started shouting at me that her grandson had come over especially to see the dog and how dare I just walk away. I said “sorry but I’m in a hurry” but she was fuming. She really just expected me so stop whatever I was doing so my dog could entertain her grandson! She never even asked if it was ok for him to approach the dog, just assumed!

I have two little dogs that kids adore

My bigger girl is very much “don’t touch me” with strangers. It’s all on her terms.

My smallest girl is a little tart and will lay belly up with a circle of kids around her fussing her. She loves it.

I will block people from touching my big girl unless she initiates it first.

I still occasionally get children try to fuss her. I have to say “don’t touch her. Just fuss the little one”

The kids usually listen. If they don’t, I will pick my big girl up so they can’t touch her

I wouldn’t have been so polite. Can you stop your children now, I’d hate them to get bitten.

YANBU. My DD loves dogs and has grown up around large breed dogs from birth. As such she isn't scared of dogs and always wants to say hello to them. However we have always had the rule that you never just approach a dog you don't know and always, always check with the owner if it's OK to stroke the dog - as some dogs are nervous, not used to children etc. Plus not every owner has time/wants to stop and chat etc. Fortunately as she's grown up with dogs she generally knows how to be gentle, not get in their face etc but if there was any sign of the dog being uncomfortable/having enough I'd move her away. The woman and her children were definitely BU. Hope your poor dog is OK x

My dog wouldn't have bitten them or anything My dog WOULD have... the second time I would probably have spoken to the mum and said 'you need to stop your kids from doing that'

They sound like really annoying kids who were harassing your dog. Doesn’t make annoying dogs owners any better. It isn’t kids vs dogs. Many people have both.

We used to have a Springer spaniel, who viewed children very much the way some people view Marmite - but who used to enjoy walking my then primary-aged son to/from school. The number of times I had to physically peel toddlers from around his neck, or detach from his (admittedly very soft and beautiful) ears was ridiculous. And the parents didn't appreciate my asking them to please control their offspring, because if they suddenly threw themselves around my dog's neck it frightened him - and a frightened dog can be a very dangerous dog. The number of times I was informed "he's a spaniel - they all love kids!" was horrifying. As though a breed's definition means that there's no individuality. Now, my old dog was a bit of a softie, who'd simply look at me as if to say "please unpeel this sticky creature from me, Mum!"... but he was nervous of children because he was badly teased/harrassed by a group of kids in our street, in our garden, as a puppy (think woofing at him, hammering fists on the fence and throwing things at him). He worshipped the ground my son walked on because they'd grown up together - and some of my son's friends whom he'd also pretty much grown up with (known them since he was 5/6 months old sort of age). But random toddlers? Not even the younger siblings of my son's friends, just random strange small children? They were very fortunate that he was as soft as he was (had he not been, there's no way I would have had him anywhere near to a school... but he enjoyed watching my son walk up into the classroom, making sure he didn't come back out, and then pottering on home for a lengthy nap in my son's favourite bit of the sofa).

Our dog now, on the other hand, is a neurotic rescue who adores small children (and is also fluffy). Rather scarily, my now hulking teen of a son was walking her one day, she heard a screaming toddler in a buggy... hurtled off to investigate and got into the buggy with the toddler! Fortunately, the parents thought it funny (I didn't when my shamefaced son came home and admitted he'd let her off the lead and what had happened), and all she did was snuffle at the toddler's wet cheeks and chin, but it could have been a hell of a lot worse! But we do have to be careful with her, because she doesn't like "mouth noises" which children like to make (raspberries, etc) and shrinks back if they suddenly lurch into her space. She has a yellow vest, though, which helps and is keen on being distracted by a biscuit if needs be, so we manage. Both of my dogs were/are trained - but having said that, I think I'd be tempted to bite if some random adult (size comparison) attached themselves around my neck because they liked my hair, or made weird noises in my face because I was wearing a fluffy jumper... why should dogs react any differently to perceived attacks upon their personal space?

^ this sums it up perfectly

You should have said something directly to the mother.

I've had to pick my little dog up and hold her out of reach before as a Dad watched his toddlers try and grab her after I had told him she was not OK to touch. She's a rescue dog and wary with strangers but looks really cute so I often have to tell people they can't pet her. The vast majority, children and adults, are really good and do ask and accept when I explain that she's a rescue dog and is scared of strangers.

I do think it is important to teach children how to behave around dogs, even if you don't have them yourself. Dogs are a fact of life and so children need to know how to be safe. Much the same as we teach them how to behave around roads, or not to go off with strangers. Children who scream and run when they see a dog are much more likely to get chased.

YANBU

I get sick of this too. I have a cute dog, she is very friendly and loves a fuss but she can be quite nervous so you have to approach her gently - she’ll then flop down, flat on her back on your feet for fuss, but if you go blasting up to her, it frightens her.

I get so fed up with the number of kids who are allowed to run up to her and try and fling their arms around her. I always step in, but I just want to walk my dog in peace.

I was playing with her on the beach last night when a kid came running over. I stopped them, but they told me their Dad said it was ok so I had to let them. Er…No. I don’t care what your Dad said.

I always taught my children to never approach other people’s dogs.

I think dog owners ( and I'm one) get all defensive about their dogs and love to blame kids. Mine is a little cute dog but she's big to a toddler. I've had more dog owners letting their dogs get to my kids than kids come up to my dog without asking.w

YANBU. Sick to death of random kids thinking it's ok to prod, poke and even try to pick my dog up whilst their parents just carry on oblivious. After failed calm attempts to tell kids to stop I just shout to the parents now 'hi can you get your kids please!'

My dogs are friendly, they wouldn't hurt a fly. But they're not toys.

They do need to be taught and that's why you should not have ASKED them to stop. You TELL them, in a clear firm voice "DONT DO THAT. If you want to make friends with a dog, always ask the owner first. Say "Please can I stroke your dog? "
If they then ask you, you say " Yes, if you are very kind and gentle; but ask your Mummy first "
Living on an island, my dogs and I spent many many hours on the ferry, teaching children how to behave as nicely as a well trained dog.