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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think that this man was an utter twat?

111 replies

fgh · 05/05/2022 18:46

I took my 20 month old and my 10 week old baby for a walk today in a park, which is also a nature reserve. This park is very popular with dog walkers, but also popular for families with little children.

There are some signs that say that dogs should be kept on leashes. Anyway, noone sticks to it... Some dogs are on leashes, but a lot aren't. I don't really have a problem with this as I understand why dog owners want to allow their dogs to run a little bit.

I think some owners are also probably not aware of this rule.

Anyway, today a man came towards me and his big black dog came running to the pushchair and started sniffing my baby.

My toddler and baby are in the Joie double pushchair which means the legs hang low, so a dog can get a good sniff.

I don't feel comfortable with dogs running up to my baby or my toddler and sniffing them as I don't know the character of the dog and if it's friendly or dangerous.

The owner made no attempts whatsoever to call his dog back. He said nothing to assure me that his dog was friendly.

This annoyed me because people always call their dogs back and/or reassure me that they are friendly.

I then shouted "Can you call your dog back please". He answered in a rather annoyed tone "She's fine". I then replied:"I have a baby here".

He then said: "Don't walk in the park then". I replied :"You're supposed to keep dogs on a leash" to which he answered:"Where does it say that?".

I then pointed out to him that there's a sign outside the park that says so to which his reply was "utter rubbish!" and he walked off.

His face was really angry and red.

AIBU to think that he was an utter twat?

There was also nobody else around at the time of the encounter and I feel like he wouldn't have spoken to me like that if my husband had been with me.

My legs were shaking after the encounter and I feel like I can't go there on my own anymore.

OP posts:
Windywuss · 05/05/2022 18:48

Happened to me when my ds was a baby. I was fuming. Owner shouted at me. There are some truly dreadful dog owners around and too many dogs. And I say this as a dog lover.

It's just plain rude.

Antarcticant · 05/05/2022 18:48

He knew he was in the wrong - that's why he was angry.

420Bruh · 05/05/2022 18:50

He was a twat and in the wrong but there's no reason to not go back.

motherducker55 · 05/05/2022 18:50

Yep utter twat. People like this give dog owners a bad name. Entitled idiots who think everyone should love their pet as much as they do. Why does he have any more right to be there than you?

You sound like you were quite restrained. If a dog approached by baby like that I would go crazy. How are you to know how it will behave? Irresponsible dickhead. I would say report him but it's usually more trouble than it's worth.

LightningAndRainbows · 05/05/2022 18:51

I noticed an increase in this sort of behaviour during the lockdowns. People were getting dogs and then getting upset if you dared ask them to control them. It's scary being a FTM and having dogs approaching.

Vikinga · 05/05/2022 18:51

What an utter bastard!

DishyFishy · 05/05/2022 18:51

Some people who own dogs are dickheads and some people who don't own dogs are dickheads.

robocracker · 05/05/2022 18:53

This happened when my eldest was a toddler. He had a husky puppy and she was walking and it bowled her right over and she ended up with a scratch on her face. His other 2 dogs then encircled the pram with my baby in and I didn't know which way to go first.

I had raging PND and I just lost it. He had the cheek to tell me I should have my toddler on a lead!

My eldest is now 15 and hugely dog phobic. She was fine up until that point.

LaurieFairyCake · 05/05/2022 18:53

He's angry and red because he's embarrassed

You were right, he was wrong - some men can't cope with feeling embarrassed when they're wrong and leap to defensiveness

AllThingsServeTheBeam · 05/05/2022 19:01

Some people a just twats.

RollOnWinter · 05/05/2022 19:02

He's a piece of shit. Keep going there, though, don't let a twat like that spoil it for you and your babies.

TeddyTrucks · 05/05/2022 19:03

I have a "big" dog (golden retriever) and also smallish children. Obviously I'd love it if all children were brought up to encourage good relations with dogs, and also that other owners appreciated the importance of encouraging safe relationships with children. Sadly this seems to be unusual these days. My only current solution is to act as an "intermediary" - to use a kind voice and encourage both child and adult to engage with one another. It works pretty well I must say.

linerforlife · 05/05/2022 19:06

Yeah he was an idiot. I'm a dog owner and always keep mine on a lead now because since having my DD I can't figure out how I would intervene if the dog ran off / got into an incident with another dog (even though she's very well trained). I just think it's safer for the dog and I! I feel sure of my decision to do this every time a dog runs up to the pram / up to me when I have DD in the carrier and jumps up at me and the owners do nothing!! Too many thoughtless owners around!

Allywill · 05/05/2022 19:08

We frequently walk round a local reservoir which also has very clear signs that dogs are not allowed. The amount of people who totally ignore this is astounding. They also seem to believe that the rule is “ridiculous “ and people who wish to enforce this rule are in some way animal haters. We are not. The reason for no dogs is simple - there are ground nesting birds and other wildlife all around and even the presence of dogs on a lead can be very distressing and harmful. Obviously not all dog owners are so entitled but from my experience of walking here a great many are.

KeepYaHeadUp · 05/05/2022 19:10

Antarcticant · 05/05/2022 18:48

He knew he was in the wrong - that's why he was angry.

This!

TheWeeDonkey · 05/05/2022 19:12

He was a dick, I'm sorry it ruined your walk. Their is lots of green fields near me and I try to get out and walk everyday and like you I see lots of dog walkers with big dogs not on leads which makes me anxious, some owners are thoughtful and call their dogs back or put them on their lead if they see other people nearby, but one particular incident a rottweiler stopped me and wouldn't let me pass, his owner was yards away completely oblivious, I had to shout him to call his dog back and he seemed really annoyed. So I kind of understand how you're feeling, I hope it doesn't put you off

DangerouslyBored · 05/05/2022 19:12

He went red because he was embarrassed at his own bellend behaviour.

My dogs never go up to random children, they have been trained not to do so.

Georgeskitchen · 05/05/2022 19:16

He's a twat. Take a pepper spray next time your out

Original poster
fgh · 05/05/2022 19:17

Georgeskitchen · 05/05/2022 19:16

He's a twat. Take a pepper spray next time your out

I would love to, but I don't think pepper sprays are allowed in the UK?

OP posts:
Dailyfailcanfeckoff · 05/05/2022 19:22

There’s a certain type of man who hates to be told anything by a woman. Like when they are being twats and don’t have god given rights to do as they wish in public spaces.
I’ve had a run in with a few of these recently.

sorry op - you have met one of these angry antisocial misogynists.

UnshakenNeedsStirring · 05/05/2022 19:24

I want to know who the idiotic 4 % who voted you are unreasonable are. the man was definitely in the wrong. I hate entitled dog owners

CloudPine · 05/05/2022 19:27

The type of dog owner that can’t control his dog and thinks everyone else should accommodate them? Twats, the lot of them.

Toseland · 05/05/2022 19:30

I think you did really well. He needed to be told and you told him. Men don’t like to be wrong, some, when they are ‘told off’ react badly. Still go to the park, it needs people like you in it - just think, you may have helped other mothers and children.

Scautish · 05/05/2022 19:31

seriously this is not about entitled dog owners, this is about a misogynistic prick who sees woman as beneath him and reacted accordingly. I would never allow my dog to do this - indeed I don’t believe that any of the dog owners I know would either.

The man is a complete twat.

Booboobagins · 05/05/2022 19:34

Some people think they have more right to do what they want versus others who just want to quietly enjoy the world.

He is a that, his dog thankfully was fine, but so many of these that's raise dogs that aren't OK.

We allow our shih tzhu to go to people but only if they are OK with it. Our bigger dog is always on a lead unless we find a lead free area to allow him to runabout and then he's muzzled. Every dog has a responsibility to make sure their dogs and other park users are safe. I glad that was the case for you.

Please don't let him stop you visiting the park. You and your DCs need to enjoy green spaces, it's really important for human well being.