Pranks

[OrlaOrchid]

As a kid, I used to play pranks, sometimes on friends or my sisters or cousins. They all pranked me too, it was fun and everyone did it. Ds seems to take after his me and loves to hatch an elaborate plan for a prank. AIBU to think that planning and playing pranks is a pretty normal part of growing up and harmless?

When my elderly DM was a child she was left at home with her three siblings while their parents went to church. The youngest was about 6. Her brothers made a vaguely life sized stuffed child made of old bits of clothing and the 6 year olds clothes on top. As the parents returned and were walking down the street the naughty bothers threw the fake child out of the upstairs window.

sorry, I know it was a horrible thing to do but we still laugh about it 70 odd years later.

There have been several family pranks over the years mostly quite elaborate but never malicious. There is a fine line though from reading some examples on here.

The issue for me with pranks is that it's having fun at someone else's expense. I find them really mean spirited.

This!

I don't think your son is funny with those pranks.

The boys involved (names changed obv.) all take part in planning various pranks that they play on each other, they find it funny and spend ages planning these things although my ds is probably the one who is most into it. It's like they are bonding over these pranks or maybe they're just killing time. But they all find it hilarious. The boy who said ds is weird is not part of this group but hasn't been pranked either. I really wouldn't know how to get him to stop, if he and his mates are into it.

The problem is that pranks, even "harmless" ones, always make someone feel stupid.

Have you not read the boy who cried wolf? He risks not bring believed when something is really wrong.

That example is classic boy who cried wolf territory. Maybe you should teach him that story and explain if he actually gets badly hurt one day no one will believe him.

Well that's a drip feed! That sounds more to me like a private drama club than pranking.

No way, he doesn't want Ollie to get upset, he wants Ollie to find it funny.

The kids who play pranks are generally not popular with their classmates, my son has a few in his year at school & they are not well liked

Im on the Fence about pranks but having said that i usually find things like Ant & Dec's pranks funny. When they dress up and go undercover to prank other celebrities. Do people not consider thi s the same?

Then what happens if Ollie calls 999 because Max has hurt himself?

I honestly thought it's completely normal and common for kids to prank each other . There is so much of this on TikTok and YT too. Ds doesn't have a phone yet but his cousin who is a year older does and shows him lots of funny clips and memes.

And it's not like the boy who cried wold, he is not a lier! He's pretend playing.

Well, it is basically lying, isn't it? It is very elaborate lying, getting someone to believe something that isn't true.

I can't understand why it is so funny to make someone believe something that isn't true. DH's family are a bit like this without the elaborate set up - someone will come in the room and they will say something that isn't true but could be, accompanied by winks and grins to the other people in the room. I mean, if I am told something I tend to believe it as I don't go round thinking people are lying for no reason, so I don't think it's a huge gotcha or hilarious to be "caught out".

I was thinking about Ant and Dec, except I can't watch that kind of thing, I just find it so cringey and awful. DS laughs like a drain though.

I loathe pranks. But I guess if you are amongst consenting friends....
I don't prank anyone since I don't appreciate it.

It's not ok to play a prank where the purpose is to humiliate or degrade someone else.

I don't think the fake injury prank is particularly nice, even if he doesn't mean harm by it, because it only really serves to amuse him and the other boy involved. Doing that kind of thing all the time will annoy other children and may cost him friends. I also don't see that it's particularly funny to see someone worried and concerned over a child apparently injured. It's a childish thing to be amused over, and yes he is a child so it's understandable and natural for him to be amused by it, but it probably shouldn't be encouraged by adults.

Joke/tricks where everyone ends up laughing, not just the prankster are ok, in moderation (people who are constantly joking around and playing pranks can become really tiresome though they might not realise it).

This is making me feel bad but I can see everyone's point of view. Any ideas how to get DS to stop his fixation on pranks? I'd hate I'm to become unpopular or annoy his mates. I honestly have no idea how to explain this to him, his confidence isn't the best at times, he's not into football like most boys in his class and this is maybe a way for him to feel 'big' and part of a friendship gang. Because he's not harming or setting out to embarrass, I'm not sure he'll see what's wrong with it. All this paints him as a bit of a joker / fool I guess he's quite silly.

When you discuss the latest prank, you can say that it was very creative etc, and also gently introduce the concept of how others might have felt. Then gradually build on that, and that it’s good to think about that before carrying out a prank.
Introduce more hobbies - tabletop games, card games, video games (in moderation), building and painting models, also look for hobby clubs in your area.
Also things like scouts, young cadets etc?

I think you need to encourage him to see that if someone is made to feel anxious, scared, upset or small and humiliated, even though they later realise it was ‘just’ a prank, they have been harmed, albeit temporarily. This doesn’t feel nice, and while they might laugh along when they realise, they probably won’t feel all that well disposed towards the person that made them feel bad.

When my son was in primary, my family had a habit of saying daft things, which my own kids knew were nonsense, and found funny. Like, I don’t know, there was an elephant sitting in grandma’s tree the other day. (You probably had to be there 😄)

My son made friends with another child whose parents were very strong that they would never lie to their children, and included jokes in that. The first time we said anything silly in that child’s presence he believed us utterly, and was horribly confused. We, of course, never used that kind of humour again around the child once we understood that. To have carried on would have been cruel.

When I first ever worked in a bar I was sent to a neighbouring bar to borrow "ice solution". They gave me rubber gloves and goggles and a container of water but told me it was a special solution. Had to carry it back to our bar like a complete numpty.

They did this with all new starters, or send them to get tartan paint, a cordless extension etc.

Whilst it was all in the name of fun, it was awkward enough to be completely new to the industry let alone that group of people.

As a teacher I wouldn't be impressed at all if he was in my class and I would be having words.

I can tell you that kids don't like being pranked, and to be made to feel stupid and taken in.

He might enjoy it but he will end up getting in trouble, it is lying really by pretending someone is hurt etc.