To think that I could actually leave the fecking house to attend a funeral

[Kneehighinnappies]

With out the whole bloody place falling apart.

I left Dh at home incharge of the kids today so i could attend my aunts funeral, obviously taking 3 under 3 was just not a option.
It is not the first time he has had to look after them on his own and he knows their rountine:
Dt breakfast 9.30/10am
dd1 breakfast 8.30am

dt's milk 11am
dd1 milk after her breakfast

But what the hell did I walk into when I returned at 12.45

The Dt's sitting there (still in their p.j's) screaming the house down, dd1 wandering round the house with a soaking wet nappy on (still in her p.j's).
When I asked him why the dt's were screaming he said he ad forgotten to give them their milk .

When I asked dd1 what she had for breakfast she said ginger bread men

So now I have had to change the dt's feeds around as they didn't want dinner at their dinner time and then they wouldn't have it at the other time because they aren't used to it, so i am left with a house of screaming sodding babies while dh is off for the rest of the night

And al because my DH can't follow simple instructions

Sorry to hear about the funeral KHIN. I think the looking after children issue is par for the course for most men - bless 'em they just can't multi-task! YANBU!

I'd have been furious too! DH did something similar recently when I had to go out in the morning. Didnt change DS's nappy or give him breakfast or get him dressed etc and kipped on the sofa while DS watched tv
I vented at him for a bit and then the next weekend I went out shopping for most of the day on my own (a well deserved break!) and told DH that it was because he obviously needed the practice at looking after DS PROPERLY! He stepped up and tried hard to do everything properly then!

No of course your not. and i don't think 'looking after the children properly' is an issue for most men! because they can't multi task!If that were true you would never see any male mursery nurses/nannies/teachers ect ect!
I think its even worse that you've come back to find chaos when you've been out to go to a funeral, just not what you need when your upset and could do with some support, not more to deal with immediately on arrival.

Message withdrawn

he did it on purpose so he wouldn't have to do it again

go out all day on Sat or Sunday this weekend and again every weekend until he gets it

Agree.

Go out more often. And for longer.

Sorry about funeral.

I'm telling him he needs more pratice as he obviously hasn't quite got the hang of it yet, gets me some much needed me time

he shouldn't need instructions, they're his children aren't they?

Yes, you are being unreasonable. Looking after children properly doesn't mean following your timetable to the second, and none of them will suffer lasting trauma because they - horrors - had their milk a bit later than usual.

You're probably just upset by the funeral. Relax. Have a gingerbread man.

Bad things happen to people who make themselves indispensable

i dont think you are being unreasonable. 3 under 3 need a routine to help them function properly, and if this is upset for any reason then sometimes kids can get grouchy and more impossible to carry on the day as usual
yes i would be fuming too

I'm amazed by some of the responses people get on here sometimes I really am.
A mum goes to a funeral leaving children in the care of their dad, she comes back to upset,hungry children in soaking nappies. Her OH then buggers off immediately and shes told 'yes you are unreasonable??'
Ubergeekian would you be happy to come back from a funeral probably feeling upset and needing a bit of TLC to find your children hungry and soaking wet? Yes looking after them properly doesn't mean following a timetable to a second, but it DOES mean doing their basic care!

She doesn't say they were hungry. She says they hadn't had their milk yet (horrors) and that they hadn't had their usual breakfast. And where did this idea that the chap immediately buggered off came from?

Yes, anybody would feel fraught after a funeral, but gingerbread for breakfast isn't the end of the world. Quite yummy, actually.

Must rush, nappy needs changed.

Hi kneehighinnappies, I don't think you're being unreasonable. I would certainly be furious and possibly have just headed back out again and left HIM to cope. What you have done is taken on too much of the looking after and let DH off the hook.

You DO need to go out more, and get him to come up with a plan/routine for looking after them in his own way. After all, he is their dad, and in this day and age, the childcare and household responsiblity does need to be split more fairly. I mean, not changing nappies and not giving the children their milk is negligent.

He needs to remember that your family of 5 is made up of 3 kids and 2 adults and not 1 adult and 4 kids.....

I don't think I am being unreasonable at all, after I signed off from here the Dt's were to say the least miserable, they cried for the rest of the evening and then I had real trouble getting them to sleep as their feeds were all out of order and they didn't want dinner or thier milk as it was all at the wrong time for them IYSWIM.

Ubergeekian- when you have 3 Dc's to look after all day by yourself, the only thing that keeps the whole thing going is the rountine and mine were taken out of theirs yesterday and it all went horribly wrong, but was it dh who had to deal with it?
no it was me.
The Dt's were hungry that is why they were in such a state when I got home and from then on they didn't settle for the rest of the day which makes life very very very hard when you have a 2 year old running round under your feet aswell, and just so you know they didn't settle for most of the night last night aswell, and was dh at here to deal with it NO!