Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To cancel on "friend" to catch up on sleep?

8 replies

tweettweet33 · 02/05/2022 07:52

I used to be best friends with this person however since covid she has changed (selfish, awkward, sulks when doesn't get own way, makes plans and doesn't turn up and a bit bizarre in her behaviour). She has always been these things apart from the not turning up but before it was just the odd time but I've distanced myself over recent months as it's become all the time and the lovely part of her has disappeared. She is not anxious about covid I must add - she's the opposite, doesn't believe in restrictions, masks, jabs and didn't follow any rules as she didn't want to but that's her choice she's an adult.

She asked me to do something today however I am still annoyed at the last time we met in the Easter hols (she was a nightmare and spoke to one of my DDs like crap). Me and DH taking kids to a festival and I said she could join us to which she said yes. Anyway last night was horrendous - baby has a cold and barely slept, DH snoring was incessant and I've had a couple of hours Kip at most.

Previously I would never dream of cancelling on her because she would sulk and be difficult but I really want to just send my DH off with the kids and try and catch up on sleep and it's something she could still go and do with her kids. Just to add the only reason I've tried to remain civil with this friend is because I work with her and know how difficult she's made it for others she doesn't get on with.

AIBU to cancel and expect her to not kick off? I feel ridiculous for asking as someone cancelled on me yesterday (bbq because weather was a bit dull) and I am fine with it but I know some would be annoyed.

OP posts:
BattenburgDonkey · 02/05/2022 07:55

Your baby is poorly and you’ve had no sleep, YANBU. No idea if shel kick off or not though…

carefullycourageous · 02/05/2022 07:56

In this situation I would lie and say I was unwell. If they kick off it is their problem.

One thing I will say is you said She is not anxious about covid I must add - she's the opposite, doesn't believe in restrictions, masks, jabs and didn't follow any rules - many people very anti restrictions are in fact extremely anxious about COVID and struggling with it - that is why they went to complete extreme of no action needed. Very worried about COVID and completely in denial about COVID are two sides of the same coin. Dealing well with COVID is usually in the middle ground.

londonrach · 02/05/2022 07:57

Cancel as you had no sleep. I've done that and mum friends done it on me for same reason...no Biggie you need sleep. A friend understand

Onlyforcake · 02/05/2022 07:57

You absolutely would cancel on anyone reasonable. Don't allow her strop to make you behave differently. Cancel, switch off your notifications and get some sleep for your sake and to focus on your family.

Then, when you're rested, if she did/ is kicking off deal with her then. When you're fresh and good to go.

Toponeniceone · 02/05/2022 07:58

Just say you're ill, it's not worth the hassle blaming it on dh etc.

NotSorry · 02/05/2022 07:59

I’d tell her you’re ill. Lack of sleep makes me feel ill so I’d cancel for that reason

tweettweet33 · 02/05/2022 08:02

carefullycourageous · 02/05/2022 07:56

In this situation I would lie and say I was unwell. If they kick off it is their problem.

One thing I will say is you said She is not anxious about covid I must add - she's the opposite, doesn't believe in restrictions, masks, jabs and didn't follow any rules - many people very anti restrictions are in fact extremely anxious about COVID and struggling with it - that is why they went to complete extreme of no action needed. Very worried about COVID and completely in denial about COVID are two sides of the same coin. Dealing well with COVID is usually in the middle ground.

I personally don't think this is her but would obv never know for sure unless she said it. It all started in covid because obv most people followed the rules which meant she couldn't go out, have parties, meet people etc and she would fall out with us for it, and it's just carried on after.

OP posts:
PatientlyWaiting21 · 02/05/2022 08:26

Sometimes you need to put yourself first. Today is one of those days

New posts on this thread. Refresh page