Can I ask how you make things easier for yourself?

[OnTheGoAlways]

I'll try and be as short as possible and let me caveat this by acknowledging that I am.a f**k up in some ways. I'd just really like help with where In my life I can make improvements, especially regarding work and children.

I have 2 sons, 7&11, ds1 I had with a partner of 6 years, we bought a house together but I left after he was violent. Ds2 with a partner of 3 years who left after he cheated. I have been (for above reasons) single since and know having another partner may cause unnecessary stress to ds. I've been single 5 years. Ds2 has struggles with emotional regulation and is on CAHMS waiting list for suspected tourettes, he has had ticks for 4 years.

After ds1 / violence I left England to Scotland to be with Mum. I have private rented since. Since I moved back here I have completed honours and postgraduate degrees, the latter In Human Resource Management. I also did a student nurse stint for 1.5 years.

I work in HR at entry level in a university,I did this at previous uni for 2 years before leaving to do nursing (which I left largely due to childcare), so I felt I had to start at entry again. The post involves mainly admin, which I do not feel passionate about, and have to write down everything because I would just forget.

I work full time and my take home is 1.4k, which doesn't cover my bills. I Am topped up by UC credit but this weekend I will be eating weetabix.

I need to pull us out of this pit, I'd like to earn more, but my confidence, exhaustion, and circumstances hold me back. I am exhausted by the Time work starts. We are renting privately and have been here for 7 years, but there have been murmurs of selling. I feel so vulnerable and Insecure. How can I climb any career ladder.like this, working alongside married (lovely lovely) woman in the senior posts and my counterpart is a (lovely lovely) young woman who's partner js a software engineer.

I don't know, I feel like I'm in a hamster wheel

I don’t have any advice tbh but you don’t sound like a fuck up at all. You sound like despite really awful difficult circumstances you have powered through 💐

If you work for a university what staff development do they offer? The one I used to work at offered 'career chats' where you had a 1:1 with a career coach which I found really helpful for working out priorities, what I needed to do when around juggling childcare and what opportunities I could pick up at work. Also look at jobs posted at the university - what skills do they require? What could you apply for that would pay more?

I think my post is already pretty outing, but I asked about a course being run at the uni in mediation, it doesn't really apply to my role at entry level but management have agreed to let me do if I can convince them why it is of benefit in my post, which Is great. I was going to go along building confidence and communication skills line. It will be really helpful in more senior posts. I have also signed up to a short course in business analytics and data at another uni, it's fully funded module from a degree programme...just been difficult to find time to do it!

I don't think it's outing at all - there are loads of universities out there and they all have HR depts and entry level staff .

You've got a postgrad qualification in HR which presumably means you'd be qualified to do more senior posts? Will these courses help you fill gaps in your CV to get a post like that? When you have your next performance review/appraisal could you ask to shadow someone more senior perhaps, or talk about career opportunities you're interested in?

I don't have advice but you sound like the opposite of a fuck up - you're trying to make life better and easier for you all, that's not a fuck up at all in my book 💖

I think you’ve done amazingly well!!
For work - ask the person in the more senior post if they would be able to mentor you, I was mentored by someone at my previous work for 1 hour per week and we covered soft skills, career progression etc. Generally I find that if you ask then a lot of people are willing to help.
For housing, is it worth joining housing association or council waiting lists? Not sure about Scotland but in England a lot of HA’s do part rent part buy and initially you can own quite a small percentage that you can then increase over time.