Paying for childminder while child has Covid

[Curiosity101]

I'm really interested in the general opinion so AIBU seems the best place for this.

My DS 2.5 currently has Covid. He's Day 6 right now, no negative LFT in sight anytime soon but he's perfectly well bouncing off the walls with the odd cough and the odd sneeze. Maybe a handful of coughs/sneezes across the whole day.

Initially the childminder suggested he stays off until he has a negative LFT - I explained how unreasonable that was given they're not a measure of how contagious you may/may not be. Plus mine was still clearly positive at Day 10 so if he's anything like me then it'll definitely be awhile yet.

So we've settled on 10 days after his first positive LFT. I do think that's being overly cautious personally given that no one else seems to be following the previous advice anymore. 7 days does feel much more reasonable - although pre pandemic it would have been as soon as their temperature was gone as we didn't actively test to see if kids had Flu/RSV/a cold etc

However for full disclosure... Our childminder has mild asthma and one of the children she minds is a 9/10 weeks old baby.

On the one hand I totally understand her cautiousness and in all honesty I don't want anyone else to get unwell. On the other hand I'm frustrated that I'm having to keep DS home and pay for the privilege. I wouldn't mind but they still go into shops, toddler groups etc, which with rates as high as they are is probably just as risky if not more risky right now given there are no enforced restrictions. Realistically I think I'm probably just frustrated with the whole situation... But still curious what the general opinion is right now...

AIBU to feel frustrated?

Just tell her he’s negative. A week is fine if he’s well and not coughing/temp/sneezing.

The childminder should have a COVID policy which states how many days the kids need to isolate for, if they need to have a negative test before returning and so on. Then you would have known the consequences of a positive test and wouldn't have had to go back and forth negotiating.

I don't think you're unreasonable to want him to go back after 7 days but if her policy is 10 then that's the way it is.

Pay her for first 3 days after positive
and then dont
Although my pee relationship up the wall

Obviously say your approach to payment to her!

I think she has a duty of care to the other children - particularly the very young baby.

I think the majority of parents have had to go through paying for child care, clubs etc that can't be attended because of having Covid.

If your child infects your childminder none of you will have childcare while she is off.

10 days sounds sensible and reasonable to me.

And then start very quickly looking for new childcare when she gives you notice for non payment.

Hopefully you have a lot of childminders where you live because most child minders know each other and don't take on children from parents who have not been reasonable or have not paid.

I used to be a child minder.

You can refuse to pay her. She might withdraw your child's place as a consequence, of course. How about you could pay her now for this round of covid and ask for a review of her covid policy?

You don’t need to test though surely- you did so because you wanted to ensure your child didn’t unknowingly infect anyone, and now it’s an issue?!

We had to pay our nanny in the same circumstances earlier in the year (and also when she had covid). We did this until they had negative LFTs, but next time I think we would agree on after day 10.

Paying when your child is ill is just one of those things. If her policy is still 10 days, that’s what it is. You definitely need to keep paying.

I'll certainly not be with holding any payment, that thought had never crossed my mind. It's rare that she's ever been off sick but in those instances we have chosen to pay her despite the contract stating that we don't have to.

Also she doesn't have a Covid policy. This is the first time any of the kids have had Covid in the while length of the pandemic. Both DS and one other child is currently off with Covid - both caught it independently over the Easter weekend.

Just pay her. You understand she cannot fill your child’s place while he is isolating ?

Why should she be out of pocket ? It is your loss, I am afraid. Just like if your child was infected with D+V etc

10 days does seem excessive now but her business, her rules. Pay up and go elsewhere if you don’t agree.

I think childcare providers should be broadly in line with schools which I think is currently 5 days off from first positive lft.

i voted Yanbu because although staying off for 10 days or until negative lft is sensible,
there is far less testing going on and I’d put money on one of the CM’s other charges going in while positive, whether knowingly or not. When my young child got covid I only tested as school insisted on it for a short time due to an outbreak. I have no intention of testing them again unless they are actually poorly. So you are being penalised for doing the right thing. Beyond 5 days if the CM doesn’t want your child in she should not charge for the days IMO. Not sure what your work situation is but for
some people covidy child staying at home = not paid for days off.

Honestly OP, at the end of your day you have to weigh up the relationship your child has with her, the care he receives and then decide what your bottom line is.
Childcare is eye wateringly expensive, so it's easy to look at it from a financial perspective- but this is also the woman who is acting as your child's caregiver in your absence. She cleans up his scrapes, and hugs him better when he's sad, teaches him colours and counting and manners and and sharing. Despite the cost, you can't approach it as a 'service to be delivered', like a plumber or a builder doing work for you. So quibbling about the charges that she imposes for absences etc (which are all pretty standard I think to charge when child is off poorly) will have much greater and far reaching consequences than just the financials.
It's just one of those things we have to accept, because the care provided is worth so much more really than the cost.

It's standard practice to still pay when your child is sick, you're paying to keep the space reserved for them. She will have some covid policy, it's a requirement now, you could ask to see it so that you're aware for future.

you wanted to ensure your child didn’t unknowingly infect anyone, and now it’s an issue?!

He's had these exact symptoms maybe 3 other times throughout the pandemic. Raised temperature, occasional cough/sneeze. Previous to now he's always shown negative but for all we know it was something else unpleasant that we just don't test for. I think that's where my frustration comes from, cause in those situations we'd have sent him back by now.

10 days just seems a very long time given he seems perfectly well, and given we're imposing a much higher bar that the majority of the rest of the population. Taking time off work to look after a child when legally there's no requirement to isolate is also tricky. Which is why I guess I probably am more frustrated at the situation as a whole.

How did she get through the whole pandemic without a Covid policy? Especially if she has asthma!

You’re not unreasonable to feel annoyed.

She’s not unreasonable to want to limit chance of infection.

Ideally you’d come to an arrangement about 50% payment for the ‘extra’ isolation days.

But good childminders take a HUGE weight off your mind and it’s not forever (tho it feels like it at the time!) so if you can afford to prioritise the relationship rather than worry about losing the money that’s a good choice.

It's just one of those things we have to accept, because the care provided is worth so much more really than the cost.

You are right of course. And all the responses are helping lower my frustration with the situation! So keep them coming 😊

I'll certainly not be with holding any payment, that thought had never crossed my mind

Aye right it didn't that is exactly why you titled your thread

Paying for childminder while child has Covid

Given current government advice for young children is 3 days of isolation after a positive test, I'd be a bit annoyed about 10 days too...

Think I'd just suck it up for now but learn from it. Don't bother testing any more.

The same process will apply if your DC gets chickenpox. there are some cases where you need to suck up and pay because your DC is contagious. With Covid, the complication is that the government have withdrawn tests etc. but setting like this and most employers are still keen to have some level of restriction in place so everyone else doesn't get it.

How did she get through the whole pandemic without a Covid policy?

Up until now it's a case of just following the law/guidance as opposed to a specific policy.

@MrsRobinsonsHandprints I'll give you that the title is poorly worded. I'd hope my post makes it more clear that it's frustration around the situation (including paying for it). I absolutely hadn't considered literally not paying - I was just going to be frustrated for awhile about it.

@PineappleWilson I accept your point. But we did actually get DS vaccinated against chicken pox. To avoid him getting sick and to avoid the inevitable 7-14 days out of childcare.