To be tired of DH turning everything into a game?

[Merryoldgoat]

I know IABU but it’s exhausting.

I’ve brought DS4 up for bath. As soon as we’re up here he’s running from room to room and I can’t get hold of him.

This is because when DH does bathtime he turns it into fun chaos.

Everything is the same.

getting him off the trampoline; getting into the car; taking him up for bed.

I know it’s lovely but I just sometimes want to bathe him and get on with the evening.

rant over.

Yep, that would drive me insane.

Honestly it’s ridiculous.

I love they have such fun but I just want to get it done so I can what I need to.

Send Daddy to do the bath?

Even quite young children can understand that eg bathtime with Dad is fun and splashy, bathtime with Mum is calm and relaxing

Have the confidence to do it your way, and let DH do his way

It’s done now. I’ve sent DS downstairs and can hear YouTube lullabies so hopefully we’re on the home straight.

DH did bathtime last night.

Or, divide chores eg ĎH always does bathtime, you do bedtime story

I think DH feels like this about how I do things but with my DC I often find a game way of doing things is easier and quicker although my games are more strategic like “who is going to be quickest to take their clothes off for their bath”

@notanothertakeaway

the key missing info is DS is autistic, non-verbal and a complete wrecking ball. Any attempt to calm stuff down is met with shrieks and splashes.

most nights it’s fine but I’m just feeling done in today.

Tell your husband that he needs to behave like an adult most of the time, have fun some of the time, and have the brains to know when the fun is appropriate. Him being a fucking party clown is not helping you or your child.

Tell him. Tell him the next time he does it you're turning over bath time or whatever to him. He'll soon get the message when you suddenly abandon him and leave him to it.

@Aquamarine1029

thats an odd reaction - he is an adult most of the time… I don’t think I implied otherwise…

I have a DH that is like this. It can be annoying but tbh if she is reluctant to do something he can always win her round that way. I pick my battles, we are good at different things. I'm the queen of bedtime! But I definitely have sympathy!

@gamerchick

yes. I’ll tell him when I go downstairs.

I think the issue is that he doesn’t get as much time with them and wants to have fun and enjoy them when he can which I understand.

its just tiring when not in the mood.

@Chiwi

thank you.

This is my thinking. If they have such fun doing it and it drives you up the wall, perhaps DH always does the bath and then you do the calming bedtime story bit? (Although calling them down after full on Daddy Wind Up Time can be fairly tricky, I know...)

We ended up doing this permanently- it started because I had a back injury so couldn't do the bending and lifting of DS to bathe him, but was ok to sit and read to him. But then it just stuck as we both found that bath / reading was our preferred bit of bedtime (and my back was dodgy for ages).

I genuinely think stuff like this is really unfair to the kid. Bath and bedtime should be relaxing and winding down, not a frenzy until the adult decides enough is enough.

@CorsicaDreaming

we could but DH isn’t always home early enough.

I think I’ve just had a hard day and wasn’t loving it.