Council worker urinating in full view of kids at our back window

[Yummymummy2020]

Without drip feeding or leaving anything out, I was in my sitting room (whole wall is basically giant window) and my two year old asked about a man out the back. There is an estate behind us and some railings close to our window. The man was full frontal facing us urinating against the railings in full view of my kids. One is a baby but obviously the two year old noticed. I went out and asked him what he was doing despite it being obvious but I was caught off guard and wanted to say something. He asked was I alright and I just came back inside a bit stunned. Now I’m really annoyed because I am weirded out and didn’t want my kids to see anything like that. But I don’t know if I’m being dramatic about this. He knew the kids were there so I feel it’s basically flashing, my husband thinks it was a foolish choice to make(there are more secluded areas seconds away) but that it’s not a huge deal. I think it is, it’s obvious the kids were there and I think it’s being a creep to deliberately do that in front of people. No idea if he had a medical issue, but again, there are secluded areas near by so why do there. The kids were in and out the back area (giant window is partially a sliding door) so I think it was really obvious we were there and also the back is littered with kids toys and a big play table . Basically there is no way he was unaware of kids. I complained about it but I’m being made feel a bit like I’m over reacting and feel a bit bad if I am in fact being dramatic. I didn’t call the police but had considered it. Then thought well maybe that’s too much. I do get medical needs to go toilet in a hurry but I had this bad feeling about his place of choice that he could have been a creep and also I obviously interrupted him and he didn’t seem embarrassed or apologetic. His back was to the estate he was doing work on but full frontal to us if that makes sense.
not really sure in a way why I’m posting here I guess just to get other feelings on it, I suppose since it was a wee it’s a bit different to flashing alone but I kind of feel it’s not with young kids especially, and I feel I should say I’m not a prude!

You're definitely not overreacting! I understand that if there are no public toilets to hand, and someone urgently needs to urinate, then needs must....but surely a hidden and more discreet place would be better! And as he's a worker that is out and about, rather than in an office/fixed place of work, he'd prepare for these situations by getting in a travel urinal or something that he can use in his vehicle.

FWIW, I do a lot of camping with my kids, and I found some fab travel urinals that are unisex and that you can use in the car or in a tent. I always keep some (along with antibacterial wipes) in the car. Means that we're never caught short!!

@Babdoc yes you are hitting the nail on the head. I think there is a double standard around here anyway to an extent, in that in the local park nobody bats an eyelid as such as it’s sadly a common enough thing, although granted in the bushes but you would see men emerging out quite often. Especially if there are matches on or running clubs in particular seem to do it a lot here. I completely agree it’s not as common with women to do and certainly more frowned upon if they did round here.

YANBU. My husband works for the council outside and sometimes he or his colleagues get caught short and we don't have many public toilets but they will go in to a wooded area or secluded bushes, not in view of children or indeed anyone.
I'm not sure about calling the police. Sometimes flashers move on to more serious crimes I believe but he'd probably claim he just needed a wee and without knowing his name I'm not sure if they'd be able to do much.
You were right to report to his employer though.

He was exposing himself and used peeing as a way to excuse this

please report

if someone really really needs to go they can always find a place where they shall not be seen/would try to hide themselves he didn’t

@TicTac80 yes I completely agree and there really are more discrete areas for sure which makes me more suspicious of him. I didn’t realise you could even get travel ones, they should sell them in my area ha ha. There are no public toilets near by, so he could have been caught short alright but I do agree with the previous poster that said there should be a plan in place for them to avoid these situations. I just am amazed someone in uniform as such would risk their job over something so silly to do that’s also got me scratching my head and wondering was it sheer arrogance as someone has suggested (also not ok of course!)

If you were to report do you have enough details to identify him? i.e. for them to identify him?

Sorry meant to write please report to the police

I understand you were shocked and feel conflicted he has done this deliberately pushed a boundary this often leaves us confused and questioning did I read the situation wrongly

the police can decide to take the matter further.

He's a flasher. No question! Report him to the police as well.

@Rosebel yes I kind of felt the police might be too much in the sense it would really be a huge thing for a person if it was a stupid lack of judgement and potentially ruin their life if they say ended up with a record when maybe a telling off from the job would make them cop on and think next time.
i guess though, If it happened again of course I would be ringing them immediately then because any benefit of doubt would be gone. Surely he will get in a lot of trouble over this by complaining to the council in itself. On the other hand of course I don’t want to be not taking it far enough if he is a genuine sinister flasher as opposed to some arrogant person not bothered about having any decency.

@VladmirsPoutine i think the council will know he is by what I told them, but perhaps it’s not enough detail for the police. There were not many of them out at the time it happened and so my admittedly poor detail would probably still stand him out a mile to him if that makes sense.

@HRTQueen yes this is exactly how I felt and do feel. I suppose I always considered a flasher as the stereotypical waving their bits around (not weeing) so I feel this is a bit of a grey area in that regard. And I also am used to my local park men often go into the bushes so I suppose I am a bit desensitised to it until it was my own back garden as such!

Yummymummy2020 he asked you if you were alright

he knew what he was doing

I was once flashed at on the tube (it was quite busy) I he was sitting opposite me in the seats that are very close together (they are not on the newer trains) was so shocked it took a while to process i remember thinking poor guy probably wasn’t aware his flies were open (he was very discreet he moved his jacket slightly as he got my attention by apologising for our legs bumping when he moved so I would see) it took a while to realise the intention

He'll get a bollocking from his boss for this possibly even dismissed although that probably depends on what council it is and what his record is like.
I wouldn't feel bad about it though at best he's an idiot and at worst he's on the road to becoming a rapist. Neither of those things are your fault.
If he does loose his job it might make him think twice before being so disgusting again.