Really stressed out - bruising and school worries

[justamumseekingadvice]

My child has autism and very regularly throws themselves off furniture onto the floor, throws themselves onto the hard floor, hits themselves in the face and throws things up in the air which ultimately then falls back down on top of them. Over the Easter holidays their behaviour has been quite challenging so all of these things have happened quite a lot which has lead to quite a few bruises - including one on their shoulder where the iPad fell back down and caught them. I am honestly so stressed out about sending them back on Monday and having to explain all of this I just want to burst into tears… the school knows that they hit themselves because they regularly witness it in school… but I feel like I’m constantly having to explain injuries and I feel sick with fear about social services 24/7.

I just feel so at the end of my tether with it all…

Bump

I am sure they will understand. Just be open about it. Send an email ahead of DC arriving back at school. Is DC at a special school?

I am a special needs teacher and sometimes have problems the other way- kids get bruises kneeling on crates, bumping into the corner of playsheds etc and the occasional parent is really difficult about it- so I get the sense of dread!!

I get the fear. Both my kids have asd/adhd and both struggle with awareness of space. Running full pelt into each other is a common occurance, of course DD announces to her teacher her brother hurt her without the full story (the latest was a game of the floor is lava and a head clash). DS is also the throwing himself off everything sort and always brusing himself. Sometimes la ds on DD.

Last bruise (floor is lava one) had 3 seperate questioning sessions from school. I feel like I'm failing them not stopping them being hurt but I don't know what else to do and it's very very rarely either being malicious to the other.

I 100% get how stressful it all is

You shoukd already have a social worker from children with disabilities team or been assessed by them for respite and support. Call the duty social worker children with disabilities team.
They are gatekeepers to support such as respite. Get his issues recorded . Including that he hurts and falls . Ask what support you can access.

I really empathise with this as I felt exactly the same when my ds was still at home. I used to be so paranoid about his bruises. The approach I took was to factually record them in his home school book. If I knew the cause, I put that in too. If I didn't, I used to say that too. He is now an adult and has many more injuries and bruises than when I was in charge. The carers note them but are in a similar position. However, interestingly they do not have the same angst as I used to have. It is shit. My ds's school was a specialist one and were understanding. However it doesn't take away the fear. It is just another example of the increased pressure of caring for a child with disabilities. I remember ds hurting his arm and I had no idea of the cause. I felt so stressed in a and e as they kept asking me how he did it. Keep flagging up his dangerous behaviour and try and stay calm. My ds was so careless and would climb, jump and run so close to the walls I feared he would bang into them.