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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Not sure whether to continue these lessons

22 replies

Saveittillthemorningafter1 · 20/04/2022 20:17

It's a woman who is paying me £20 an hour for maths/English/science for her son. Stupidly didn't check the going rate for tutoring so I accepted her £20 request.
It's a 30 minute journey each way on public transport.
I've been offered a drink once or twice in 3 months, she's never really shown any appreciation either or made positive comments.

She used to be flexible with the time, it was ok for anytime between 6 and 7 as she understood buses weren't always on time and sometimes I finished work later. Now it's 6pm or nothing. I had texted saying I would be there for 6:30 and she replied, "You need to be on time next time."

She occasionally asks how her son is doing. We use a workbook and I mark it so she can see what he's got right and wrong. I annotate and leave notes too, always set homework, mark it etc.

I ask him what areas he struggles with. I'm sure my lessons are not absolutely amazing but I feel that I'm making an effort and I can see progress from him which is great. He gets the majority of questions right.

I'm focusing on grammar exercises as requested.

Tonight she came over at the end of the lesson and asked about his progress etc. I said he was doing great and that we had nearly finished the book. She just said, "Perhaps in the next lesson you can try to introduce X topic and do X first, so that you can 'teach better".

Not sure if it was a language thing as their first language isn't English but i thought that was pretty cheeky of her. i wouldn't tell her how to do her job 'better'.

Don't want to leave the boy in the lurch, it's not his fault. Maybe stick it out for this term, or ask for £25 an hour instead? Not really sure.

OP posts:
BungleandGeorge · 20/04/2022 20:21

£20 for 2 hours. And you’re paying to get there? Are you a qualified teacher?

Quartz2208 · 20/04/2022 20:21

You need to stop this. You are being taken advantage off and her son will be fine

Saveittillthemorningafter1 · 20/04/2022 20:22

No £20 per hour sorry.
Yes i have a PGCE and I've a few years experience (not currently working as a teacher though)
I could perhaps find him another tutor before I leave or try to help

OP posts:
TulipsHere · 20/04/2022 20:24

Sounds like you aren't gaining anything from this?

FabFitFifties · 20/04/2022 20:28

Let her find someone who can "teach better".

Saveittillthemorningafter1 · 20/04/2022 20:40

Yes maybe I should!
The £20 pays the cost of my weekly bus fare I suppose

OP posts:
MasterBeth · 20/04/2022 20:44

How much is your bus fare?

You're being paid £20 minus your transport cost (and any other expenses?) for two hours of your time...

How much is an hour of your time worth?

BungleandGeorge · 20/04/2022 20:46

So she’s paying you £40 for one hour travel and one hour teaching? That’s not so bad, I’m not sure I’d expect full rate for the travel. It’s more usual to just pay for the hour tutoring and the child travel to
you. Is that an option? Or is teaching via zoom an option? You could get someone with years of experience and further qualifications for £40 ph round here. It’s impossible to say whether her expectations are off or whether your lack of experience is showing. If the child is primary age potentially you arriving at 6.30 and then not finishing until 7.30 is a problem with tiredness which is maybe why she wants you at 6? Not offering a drink is really rude. If you’re not happy you shouldn’t feel
the need to continue or find another tutor, parents can easily do that. Just maybe offer a couple of weeks notice?

ClaudiusTheGod · 20/04/2022 20:50

Tell the woman you are now exclusively working from home.

You should also be charging a minimum of £30 an hour.

Value yourself. There is plenty of demand for extra tuition. You are a trained teacher and you know what to teach and how to teach it. Start your home tutoring career tomorrow and see this episode as a lesson learned (pun intended).

Good luck!

Saveittillthemorningafter1 · 20/04/2022 20:52

No i am not paid travel time, I am paid £20 in total, that's it. I don't get £40

OP posts:
NotSorry · 20/04/2022 20:53

I voted YABU for putting up with this OP. I teach (sport) and would have binned them
off ages ago. Why are you feeling bad? She’s not feeling bad about you

Saveittillthemorningafter1 · 20/04/2022 20:53

I have around 10 years of experience.

The boy is 14, but I don't think she would send him on his own really

OP posts:
Saveittillthemorningafter1 · 20/04/2022 20:55

I'm going to give my notice and send them a link for potential new tutors

OP posts:
TooManyAnimals94 · 20/04/2022 20:58

Put your hourly rate up to what you think your time is worth and see what she says. She'll either say no and you lose the hassle or she'll agree and you'll feel like your getting paid enough to make it worthwhile.

BungleandGeorge · 20/04/2022 21:07

What subject did you teach? I think she’s being unrealistic wanting one person to be able to tutor a 14 year old in English, Maths and all 3 sciences! And for only an hour a week! Tutors are generally quite subject specific for teenagers, You must be doing a lot of prep work. Definitely sounds like not worth your while.

RedskyThisNight · 20/04/2022 21:08

You are undercharging and the commute time makes it not really worth your while.
Expecting you to be on time and asking you to cover particular topics are not unreasonable requests.

Saveittillthemorningafter1 · 21/04/2022 09:37

It's understandable that she expects me to be on time, however there is zero flexibility offered with the lesson time. As i said it used to be ok between 6 and 7pm, now it's 6pm or nothing.
She's allowed to ask me to cover certain topics, however that's not what she did. She tried to tell me how to teach so that I can be a 'better teacher'.

OP posts:
Saveittillthemorningafter1 · 21/04/2022 09:39

I feel bad asking them for more money as they seem to live in a very dire housing situation, the living room also doubles up as a shared bedroom for the pupil and his brother.
We did the lesson with all the lights off, presumably to save on electricity.
I think this thread has helped me realise the best thing is just to quit

OP posts:
LegMeChicken · 21/04/2022 09:42

Their dire housing situation isn’t your problem. There are plenty of charities that can help. You’re not a charity are you?
Put up your prices. Who knows she may even come back after realising what other tutors actually charge

MadKittenWoman · 21/04/2022 09:50

You are massively underselling yourself. I charge £35 ph for a maximum 15-minute drive away and £32 for a lesson at my house. I am the professional; if a client criticises my teaching they can find someone else.

RedHelenB · 21/04/2022 09:54

Saveittillthemorningafter1 · 20/04/2022 20:17

It's a woman who is paying me £20 an hour for maths/English/science for her son. Stupidly didn't check the going rate for tutoring so I accepted her £20 request.
It's a 30 minute journey each way on public transport.
I've been offered a drink once or twice in 3 months, she's never really shown any appreciation either or made positive comments.

She used to be flexible with the time, it was ok for anytime between 6 and 7 as she understood buses weren't always on time and sometimes I finished work later. Now it's 6pm or nothing. I had texted saying I would be there for 6:30 and she replied, "You need to be on time next time."

She occasionally asks how her son is doing. We use a workbook and I mark it so she can see what he's got right and wrong. I annotate and leave notes too, always set homework, mark it etc.

I ask him what areas he struggles with. I'm sure my lessons are not absolutely amazing but I feel that I'm making an effort and I can see progress from him which is great. He gets the majority of questions right.

I'm focusing on grammar exercises as requested.

Tonight she came over at the end of the lesson and asked about his progress etc. I said he was doing great and that we had nearly finished the book. She just said, "Perhaps in the next lesson you can try to introduce X topic and do X first, so that you can 'teach better".

Not sure if it was a language thing as their first language isn't English but i thought that was pretty cheeky of her. i wouldn't tell her how to do her job 'better'.

Don't want to leave the boy in the lurch, it's not his fault. Maybe stick it out for this term, or ask for £25 an hour instead? Not really sure.

I think working through a workbook is very basic and not using your teacher equals to the and so yabu. How you get to the job isn't get problem. Howevet, if you don't think it's worthwhile quit but I wouldn't pay you more.

Brefugee · 21/04/2022 10:15

that is way too little, and with transport (that you are paying yourself) it is really far too little.

i used to teach (EFL) and i only did 2 hour chunks (in Germany, and in this instance "hour" = "School hour" which is 45 minutes) and expected either a fee for transport (I drove) or they came to me. I expected, and received, the full fee for the time i taught. Books etc paid for by the student/family.

But it sounds as though they can't afford it. I did offer different types of lessons though - so 2 pupils at the same time would pay about 70% of the usual fee, 5% discount for siblings etc. You also need to factor in that if they come to you, it uses your electricity etc so you need to think about that too.

Not being offered a drink is neither here nor there. But only working from a workbook doesn't really sound much like teaching to me. You need to use a workbook as a base but vary the lessons and so on (I guess you know this as a teacher, sorry)

In short: sack it off and if you want to carry on tutoring you need to research the market.

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