Anxiety about becoming a parent

[Alwaysanxiousmum2be]

DP and I are thinking of trying for a baby. This is something that we have talked about for a while. However, I have ADHD (which I take medication for), Dyspraxia and dyslexia as well as Ehlers–Danlos syndrome (hyper mobility type), I also get very severe migraines.
DP was also diagnosed as an adult with ADHD.
On top of this, I was a sick baby, and suffered with a urinary tract reflux, which left me with kidney scarring, which I am worried about my baby inheriting.

I am worried about managing parenting with our own mental/ chronic illnesses, especially if our children inherit any of our own behavioural issues.

DP doesn’t seem especially concerned about any of this, and often when I bring it up he gets very touchy, and says that none of this should stop us from having children and that we will find ways to cope.

I am not sure if I am being unreasonable, I do really want to have children, has anyone else had any similar worries? Any advice?

PS sorry for the long, rambling post, I hope this all makes sense.

How well do you cope with life right now?
Does you both having ADHD mean you find some aspects of life a real struggle, or do you have coping mechanisms?
If life gets stressful, do you cope or does everything get too much?
Do you have family support, practical as well as emotional?

Thank you for your response, I would say we both have coping mechanisms that have been refined through adulthood. It can be hard for me to cope with stress at times, often I would get a migraine through stressful times, this normally means i have to be in a dark room until it passes, I know this would be difficult to do, especially with young children. I have very supportive family, but i am worried about relying on them too much.

I have ADHD and a couple of chronic conditions. I have one child and it has been hard but you make your own coping mechanisms and structure and you adapt and manage. I actually found things a bit easier in some respects as the baby becomes your priority and creates some structure and organisation in your life.

My boy is an absolute joy and having him is honestly the best thing I ever did. If my conditions had allowed it I would have had more children.

Thank you so much for sharing this- very reassuring😀