Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Help just bought a maltese puppy 13 weeks old coming home with us on friday

81 replies

Deereemer · 19/04/2022 22:44

Help! This is a much wanted pet and will be very much in the family forever, bought from a reputable registered breeder, met mum and all the pups it was great. Hes coming home in 2 or 3 days, any advice on a new puppy welcomed. Do i wear him in a doggy sling to bond? Buy a crate? Got the food ordered. He has already had his second vaccination so can we start going on day trips with him? Thank you!!

OP posts:
IthinkIsawahairbrushbackthere · 19/04/2022 23:18

My pup was only 8 weeks when we got him so I used a sling a lot. It was also handy if we went out to a cafe or for a longer walk. It's not a ridiculous suggestion, just not a necessity.

Ohilovetorave · 19/04/2022 23:18

Why didn't you get him at 8 weeks? That's the normal age, 13 weeks as PP said is very late, past the window of ideal weaning

StillMedusa · 19/04/2022 23:19

Day trip.. no.. too much too soon.
Having said that, our puppy had a 5 hour journey home from the breeder.. we stopped twice for a pee as far away from other dogs as possible and it was fine.
You don't need a sling if he's had his jabs.. just nice tiny walks.
We used a soft crate in the car til ours was big enough to go in the boot.

I slept on the sofa downstairs for the first 10 days.. next to pup, so when she stirred I could take her straight out for the loo... she was completely clean and dry by 11 weeks (got her at 9) so it was worth it.

Just remember.. he's a baby, taken away from his mum.. you are Mum now and he needs you , to be with you .

Personally I hate crates.. they are cages. We never used one and our dog is chilled, and happy to be wherever we are, but others like them.

Good luck.. the puppy early months are hard work but also fab!

Sofasogood1 · 19/04/2022 23:22

@Happenchance

We crate trained our puppy from day one. First night basically ignoring him was hell but he's been perfect ever since. Please don't leave your puppy to cry. If you do, you increase the chances that he'll grow into an anxious dog.
He's six months now and is fine! Not anxious at all. Or rather, yet. Very confident with other people and dogs - possibly a little over friendly! Follows me round the house but settles quickly when left alone at night or when we go out, although he's rarely left alone and never for more than a couple of hours. If anything we need to leave him alone more often! Could be the breed though.
WeddingFavour · 19/04/2022 23:26

@Sofasogood1 Just cos it seems like it worked for you doesn't mean it's the right thing to do. A puppy that knows he can rely on you is a secure puppy. All you trained him to do was learn that crying doesn't work. It doesn't mean he was happy from night 2. Sorry if that's hard to hear.

@Deereemer Was this an impulse buy? Why is the puppy 13 weeks? I think you're in for a massive shock tbh, you sound really unprepared. I'd think twice about this or there's a good chance you'll be returning the puppy to the breeder in two weeks.

ThisisMax · 19/04/2022 23:26

Its not a reputable breeder ifyou are getting it at 13 weeks. You should do a bit of reading before Friday as you sound clueless about puppies.

ThinWomansBrain · 19/04/2022 23:27

@Deereemer

Aww dorothea thats so lovely to hear!! We have quite a territorial rescue cat so thought crate would be best at first. Would a day trip about 90 mins away be ok from next week?
If you have a cat who has established his/her space, you'll enjoy Malcolm the Cat on twitter twitter.com/Malcolm_theCat Malcolm or Babydog "post" daily - the joys and trials of a puppy moving in to live with a mature cat. Baby dog, the puppy, has grown up a bit - I think he is two now. Can be very Funny
WonderfulYou · 19/04/2022 23:30

Surely if it’s a much wanted pet then you would have done all this research by now and not left it 2 days before to think about these things, let alone buy them.

You’ll find your own way of doing things but a reputable breeder should be able to tell you lots of information and things that Kim uses so puppy will probably already be used to it.

You definitely don’t need a sling, it’s not a human baby.

WonderfulYou · 19/04/2022 23:31

Most breeders don’t sell puppies until they are 12 weeks now.

I don’t know if that’s new law or if it’s just more beneficial for the puppy.

WonderfulYou · 19/04/2022 23:32

Same with kittens.

ThisisMax · 19/04/2022 23:36

@WonderfulYou

Most breeders don’t sell puppies until they are 12 weeks now.

I don’t know if that’s new law or if it’s just more beneficial for the puppy.

No thats bollox. 8 weeks to 12 weeks is a critical experiental period for puppies. 12 weeks is too late, particularly for larger breeds.
Mariposista · 19/04/2022 23:40

Congratulations on your new family member!!!!
Socialise him as much as you possibly can while he is tiny. Expose him to lots of different situations and people (we were actually given a list for ours 🤣). We took our lab to a cafe or pub at least once a week to get him used to being around crowds and behaving nicely in public - he can be taken anywhere now and this was important to us as we go out for coffee a lot especially on holiday and wanted to be able to take him without him being embarrassing.

iloveruby · 19/04/2022 23:42

Congratulations on the puppy OP! And it's good you are looking for advice on what to do when he arrives.
There is lots of valuable information in the thread and definitely agree that a 90 minute trip is too long - he is essentially a baby so think about little short walks and trips out. It is definitely important that he is socialised and becomes used to different environments but it is also important not to overwhelm him as that will make him more anxious.

For his first weekend I would concentrate on getting him settled at home - it is a big move for him and he needs to learn he is safe and secure with you.

Good luck and have fun!

jytdtysrht · 19/04/2022 23:44

I think that crate training is important for a maltese. He will always be small and will need a safe place, particularly if you have a cat. I like mine to sleep in the crate (in our room) so that I know where he is and that he isn't going to be stepped on etc. If you have children, they need to be careful with such a little dog under their feet.

You should not wear him IMO. He will be very attached to you anyway. You can take him in a dog bag if you are out and he has walked far enough or if you need to carry him for some other reason - but there is no need to create the attachment - maltese love their family.

I'd get some puppy pads. They are especially useful for little dogs. They can be notoriously difficult to housetrain, but not all of them are.

Wineat5isfine · 19/04/2022 23:59

Crate training, toilet training, possession aggression training…lots of food in and lots of 1 on 2 time to settle pup in

WiddlinDiddlin · 20/04/2022 05:16

Along with the facebook group DTAS, I can also recommend the dog training app Zigzag - its a subscription (not a lot and you can have a look for free first) but it gives you daily stuff to do, articles to read, and you get the option to contact a trainer/behaviour consultant via whatsapp/phone/email any time for one to one personalised support (and they're all qualified with recognised bodies, all force free, science based stuff).

Please ignore the people talking ignorant bullcrap about leaving puppies to cry, or that bonding isn't important - it is, if a sling helps you do tasks like school runs or whatever, before puppy is old enough to go on the ground, great, as long as pup is comfy in the sling thats fine.

Btw for the clever pants suggesting that 13 weeks is too old and that this means the OP has bought from a dodgy breeder or on a whim - not so. Good breeders of toy breeds will hold them to 12/13 weeks rather than let them go at 8, at 8 weeks some of these breeds are just TOO tiny to go home.

FleurDeLizz · 20/04/2022 05:40

ThisisMax · 19/04/2022 23:36

@WonderfulYou

Most breeders don’t sell puppies until they are 12 weeks now.

I don’t know if that’s new law or if it’s just more beneficial for the puppy.

No thats bollox. 8 weeks to 12 weeks is a critical experiental period for puppies. 12 weeks is too late, particularly for larger breeds.

you didn’t read the bit where the op says it’s a Maltese?

Andouillette · 20/04/2022 05:53

ThisisMax · 19/04/2022 23:26

Its not a reputable breeder ifyou are getting it at 13 weeks. You should do a bit of reading before Friday as you sound clueless about puppies.

Nonsense, where on earth did you get that idea from? I have never had a problem bonding with a new dog at any age from 6 weeks* to 5 years and nor has anybody else I know. Also I would much rather OP asked questions than not. Far better a new dog owner asking than thinking they know it all and messing up.
*too young, very glad it's now 8 weeks minimum.

SlashBeef · 20/04/2022 06:26

The lack of research is worrying..

RedHelenB · 20/04/2022 06:37

Happenchance · 19/04/2022 23:15

We crate trained our puppy from day one. First night basically ignoring him was hell but he's been perfect ever since. Please don't leave your puppy to cry. If you do, you increase the chances that he'll grow into an anxious dog.

We did the same, had him 5 years now and he's quite happy alone and is very sociable with other dogs and people. It's a dog not a baby.

Whetheryouthinkyoucan · 20/04/2022 06:40

Many very reputable toy breed breeders keep pups until 12/13 weeks when fully vaccinated. What works for toy breeds doesn’t necessarily follow for other breeds, mine are best if they go at 9/10 weeks.

anyway, the real concern and indicator that this breeder isn’t that reputable is that they are selling a puppy seemingly spur of the moment to unprepared owners.

WeddingFavour · 20/04/2022 06:57

@RedHelenB We did the same, had him 5 years now and he's quite happy alone and is very sociable with other dogs and people. It's a dog not a baby

It's a baby dog... As above, just cos you got away with it doesn't mean it's the right thing to do. Some people get good results with choke collars, absolutely doesn't mean it's acceptable.

@Whetheryouthinkyoucan anyway, the real concern and indicator that this breeder isn’t that reputable is that they are selling a puppy seemingly spur of the moment to unprepared owners.

Agreed. Very concerning, as are the posts about 'awww enjoy your new puppy' fgs. It's a massive commitment, not a teddy.

Tumbleweed101 · 20/04/2022 07:00

A sling might be used to go out for walks for early socialisation prior to vaccinations but you don’t need one for bonding. The best way to bond with a puppy is to play, train and feed them, be the person meeting their needs. Puppies are generally sociable and want to interact.

I used a little dog car seat when mine was a puppy. Like a dog bed but with harnesses. Kept him on the front passenger seat where I could see him but he couldn’t jump about. He’s never been sick in the car, I took him for short rides every day from when I got him. I don’t see a problem with a longer journey so long as you are prepared for mess if he is sick and can clean up ok. He might need a wee stop at that age.

User0610134049 · 20/04/2022 07:02

Sorry don’t want to derail but interesting about the car journey thing. Surely LOADS of people buy their puppies from more than 20 mins drive away so they have to do a longer journey when they first get them?

WeddingFavour · 20/04/2022 07:12

@User0610134049 Yes as a one-off, needs-must sort of thing, but you wouldn't then voluntarily do long journeys straight away. Mine was fine in the car from day 1, I was all set for lots of training but she was grand, never vomited or peed in the car at all. We still did loads of short journeys (to good walks with new smells so she associated the car with Good Things) at first. Mine is a spaniel so tbh it was a long time before she could even sit still for 90 minutes.