Looking for some perspective here please.
I came out of a long term toxic relationship in January last year, to the point where I changed a lot about myself and compromised a lot. Since leaving I promised myself that I would never, ever let someone stop me from doing something that I wanted to do.
In the last few months of the relationship I started thinking about visiting another country on my own - it was my escape. I dreamt of getting up when I want to, eating breakfast, lunch, dinner watching the world go by and walking alone in nature. When I eventually left my ex I started thinking about going on this trip away - only for 2/3 weeks but on my own, walking and enjoying the sites of a new country.
Unexpectedly a few months after the separation I met someone. We hit it off so well. To the point where I didn't know I could feel this level of desire, passion, and emotional connection with anyone, as well as having the same interests and hobbies. The last few months have been amazing and I am excited for the future with him.
I still would love to do the trip. I know that I would love his company and know we'd have a great time together, but in my head I keep thinking I should perhaps do it on my own, just for 2 weeks (to get this escapism and dream out of my head). I think going from one relationship to another within a few months I still think I should go on my own.
I mentioned it to him, and whilst he hasn't said don't go, he isn't supportive. He says he thinks he would find it strange if I went without him but would never stop me. He feels that if it were him he would want me to be there and experience it together. We haven't argued about it, just had a discussion about this.
I get his point and see this, but I'm not going to escape him, it's to experience this for myself. And just to add, he isn't able to have 2 weeks off work at a time.
What do you think? Now that I am with him would it be strange to do? I've not long turned 40 and don't need any drama in my life. I don't know whether I need to suck this up, or make him understand. I worry what he would feel, or what others would say if I did go. I am very happy in my life but I can't seem to shift the thought of just doing it and getting it over and done with.