how to children make so much muck and dirt?

[12yearsinazkaban]

When I moved in (less than a year ago, mind you) the walls were freshly painted and the whole place had a nice deep clean by a cleaner.
Well my kids have fucked it up. Disgusting walls caked in dirt with the odd drawing here and there (how? the pens and pencils are literally kept under lock and key)
food found everywhere (same I lock it away in the pantry and only distribute at meal times and snack times. how do they get it?)
the floors are just covered in mud every single day, unless I mop 3 or 4 times over (so would take hours which I did on week 3 or 4 to try to keep up with the mess) I'm basically just mopping dirt around... I don't get it. I always clean, all day every day. But I turn around and food has been smeared in the doorframe or somewhere I didn't even know existed until they smash banana in the cracks.... I am so sick of living in squalor. thats what it is. a hovel. I can't relax and they some reason live going under my bed and taking all the fucking shit out in the process.

I haven't recovered from the last time we all had sickness. the washing from a million gallons of sick all over every bed, carpet, towel. I don't think I'll ever get it done. even in this beautiful weather.

I can't be the only one.

And puzzles? lego? games with pieces or god forbid cards. why bend the cards? I just can't keep up. how could I? there are 5 of them and 1 of me.

To make it worse I'm a sahm with a dh who actually pulls his weight at home and I still can't manage to keep it looking not like a shit tip.

how do people do it? I certainly can't. I could have maybe 2 children ago. it's so depressing.

also every time we paint or fix something or decorated something it just gets fucked. I am at my wits end. I don't remember running round like a Tanzanian devil when I was a child but maybe I did. I had 5 brothers and sisters so similar size family. absolutely shattered.

I don't know but if you find out I'd like to be let in on the secret!

I'm slowly accepting that either the house looks great but I spend all of my free time doing (and redoing) it or it looks less great but I have some free time. I honestly think people with cleaner homes (with children) just spend more time cleaning or have hired help.

I'd be furious. My kids have never drawn on walls or stuffed food into cracks.

Given that they can't be trusted not to behave like animals, you need to get tough. You're already locking up the pens and the food, so find out where they're keeping any extra. Utterly ban shoes indoors and supervise them coming in and out.

Any transgression must have a consequence. Mud on the floor, drawings or food on the walls - loss of privileges. No games, TV, phones or fun. If they suffered consequences for their actions, they wouldn't do them. They don't draw on the walls at school, and they won't at work one day, so they can learn not to do it now.

Do you think part of it is actually that you are a SAHM and therefore the children are in the house more? Mine are a bit older now but even so I have noticed that the house just can't stay tidy/clean during the holidays as we're in so much more than usual. Its things like having every meal at home and all the related washing up etc and time to get toys out, play in the garden etc.

Not a solution by any means but you might need to be more forgiving on yourself and count the days until they are at school!

Disgusting walls caked in dirt with the odd drawing here and there (how? the pens and pencils are literally kept under lock and key)
food found everywhere (same I lock it away in the pantry and only distribute at meal times and snack times. how do they get it?)
the floors are just covered in mud every single day, unless I mop 3 or 4 times over

How old are the kids? I would not accept this at all. If mine traipse mud in, I stand over them whilst they clean it up. Strangely enough, they've learnt to clean their shoes outside and take them off at the door.
Same with anything else really. Whilst they were really small, I made them sit and wait whilst I cleaned up the mess or drawing on the wall/furniture. Since around aged 8, I've expected them to do it under supervision.
I also expect them to help clean and tidy when asked. Do your DC do anything to help around the house?

SAHM with 6 kids and a shedding dog, dh works away for long stints so no help. Food I do not allow out of the kitchen, though the teen is pushing that boundary atm. We have the odd bit of pen on furniture but I give them a bollocking and they don't do it for a while, until they forget as kids do. I have them tidy their rooms so I can hoover, anything not moved will be disposed of swiftly in a bin bag. Shoes off as soon as they come in, no running in/out all day as that would drive me insane. You've got to be mean sometimes to keep order, they will always keep pushing the boundaries and that can be exhausting.

Better hose em down before entering the house. (joking)
At least their dirty or wet clothing and boots can be left in one area to dry properly. Don't let them out of the kitchen until they washed and put away their dishes and place at the table is clean. 5 kids? I'd never do dishes again, get them in a dish washing kitchen tidying team like a professional kitchen. With a chart and pencil on the wall as to who's turn it is to do what. Check off time and sign when done.